From: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org (The Rockford Files) To: rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Subject: The Rockford Files V1 #325 Reply-To: rockford-files@smoe.org Sender: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk The Rockford Files Friday, December 4 1998 Volume 01 : Number 325 Today's Filings: ----------------- I've got the answers! Look straight at the coming disaster... Tony Quote (& More!) also.. MUST...LOVE...KITH... would that I could circumambulate O H I O O H I O AAA! Whose a happy little bunky! I have pretty emerald nail polish with glitter on ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Thu, 03 Dec 1998 03:50:52 -0500 From: Jessica Brandt Subject: I've got the answers! Carrie: Hotel La Rut...mark's BEST moment in drag, i believe. Ginger concurs. Rufus: Being "in" on the KITH newsgroup, I get to know all about Rufus, and people are very proud of the fact that he's a gay canadian. I got to see "April Fools" on MM and i pointed and said "look! gay canadian!" and i laughed. tee hee. Jen: Louis Sakajalexis (oh dear lord, pardon my spelling) Go Tribe! John_oc: 107.9 pioneering? Excuse me? i think we shall exchange that adjective for "at fault" if they are influencing radio everywhere. 107.9 was the reason i quit listening to the radio. Oh, but i DO hear the radio, those 2 hours in the morning as I try to get up. They always play the same songs in the morning, they sometimes play the same songs 2 times in 2 hours, and they only play stuff that SUCKS. bah. Courtney: hello, New Shrub is up. Where is Courtney's kickass column? READ THE DECEMBER ISSUE OF THE SHRUBBERY. WE GOT MORE JESUS. AND PRINCE CHARLES. AND A PICTURE OF ME PRE-1985, AS WELL AS ME IN MY PROM DRESS. WOO! oh yeah, there's also an FoP review by a *gasp* non list-member! Jess *********************************************************** I'm not just naked, I'm Naked for Jesus!!! * --+-READ THE SHRUBBERY-+-- * http://www.theshrubbery.prohosting.com --New Every Month- -Humor, Music, News and More-- *********************************************************** ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 03 Dec 1998 09:22:31 -0500 From: shirak@umich.edu Subject: Look straight at the coming disaster... Realize what you've lost. You keep handing out horseshoes, Horseshoes have gotta be tossed... About that whole unhappy single vibe, does it still work if you just quietly resign to spending the rest of your life alone with about a dozen or so cats? ;) I did a very unwise thing last night, that fortunately had no ill results. I spent most of last night alone with my very drunk ex-girlfriend after getting drunk on my own Power myself. (SoBe Power and whiskey. Mmmmmmmmm! ;> ) As I said, nothing bad happened, but that didn't stop the thoughts. Anyway, I've decided I should go to a Shaolin temple or something instead of kicking around here. I mean, I'm already celibate (unwillingly, true, but I've learned to deal,) I shave my head often enough anyway, and I look good in robes. Plus, I just want the cool brands on my forearms.... No, wait, that's just the series... Two more things before I slink off into the night. 1) Jodie, there are FIVE elements, not four. Fortunately, Void doesn't require anything to represent it. It just needs to be acknowledged. 2) 20 Bonus cool points for identifying the song at the beginning of this drivel and giving me the band that performs it and another song by them. ;) Anyway, I'm off, laters all! Hail Eris! ERIC ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 07:17:59 -0800 From: "Kamp, Marcus S" Subject: Tony Quote (& More!) Carrie, your Tony quote comes from Kids In the Hall, and you know it! In other news, the CD has been delayed because the distribution company are a bunch of doss fecks. Looks like the end of THIS month instead. And I'm pissed. ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 10:36:27 -0500 (EST) From: Ginger Nance Subject: also.. Just a small shameless plug for my new story in this month's Shrub, too. :) It's based on a true story, and I'm sure y'all will see where I stole at least one character from real life! Ginger :) Ginger Nance gnance@email.unc.edu http://www.unc.edu/~gnance ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 10:36:53 EST From: FieryLox@aol.com Subject: MUST...LOVE...KITH... <<"Oh, I was just theenking of Tony, where he ees, what ees he doing, who he ees weeth, what ees he theenking of, ees he theenking of me?, and eef he will ever return to me one day..." Where's it from, people? Winner gets my highest regard.>> KIDS IN THE HALL!!! i miss those five gay/not gay boys...i don't know how many of you on this list like jump, little children (court and anoop...!), but the other night a friend and i matched all five of them up with the kids. guess who got scott? ;-) (hint: i think he's the sexiest creature to walk the earth...ever.) Carrie, know this one? "hecubus, pick a card..." "no!" "evil, evil, impolite and evil!" <> yo, count me in. it happens! and he said he's never had a REAL relationship...maybe he's just not peeking in the right doors... <<1) David Sedaris' Santaland Diaries(as a play) is showing in Boston, which hopefully is good. 2) possibly go to the rufus show the 14th, if god is with me. Insight-you know what? Lenoard Cohen , altho' I cant spell his name, is such a great poet.>> have you read Sedaris' Naked? the book had me rolling on the floor, seriously. yay elisabeth for recently joining up to the rufus mailing list! i think you should attempt to go to the show. you can always hang out near the back of the club and pray that you see Rufus, when you do, attack him with your vast knowledge of his music and politely ask if he could let you in...it works, TRUST ME! i love katie grace buckner, really i do. i wish she wasn't so angry all the time. tally ho! sara ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 03 Dec 1998 12:04:17 -0500 From: Dan Cohen Subject: would that I could circumambulate If anyone can tell me where that subject header came from, they win regard, a guest shot on my debut album, "Yo, Bitch, Gimme Summa That Fatburger", and the contents of my vest pocket (a Life Saver (tm), some lint, and a wadded-up hall pass from ninth grade). Ginger- Toes! Yes! "That hottie bass player Heath..." Heh. Despite the ending, which was a bit, um, shall we say, strange, I enjoyed it. And the return of Gingerfoot, even! Hehehe. Jodie- OK. I've got this weird Santa candle I bought at Big Lots last night, only 'cause I want to prove my theory that a melted Santa really freaks the kiddies out, my vaporizer, this psycho rock I got in the mountains once, and a paper airplane. No perceptible effects yet, and they've been there for about 16 hours or so. Marcus- Is it wise to post that from a company email address? They can and do monitor your mail, you know; it's not illegal and it happens regularly. There's nothing wrong with complaining about your company, but taken the wrong way... Matthew- Here now my complete list o' teams: College: Syracuse anything. Lacrosse is where it's at :) Baseball: I detest the Yankees, so I must root for the Mets. Closet Blue Jays fan, since they have their AAA club here in the Cuse, but patriotic responsibility blah blah go Mets. Red Sox if the Mets are having a bad year. Wait, the Red Sox don't usually have good years. Hmm... Football: Bills. Oh yes. Basketball: Well, if there's a season, ever, it's the Knicks and the Bulls. Gotta love the rivalries, and Michael, if he comes back, cannot be rooted against. Hockey: Rangers. They may suck, but dammit, they're the Rangers. Rub her slit on the bass guitar! And Courtney's abandoning the film industry. Well, think about it. You can either be a production assistant for ten years and/or wait tables in Hollywood or be a receptionist and suck up to some producer in the music industry. It's a win/win situation. Maybe you'll end up like Rollergirl in "Boogie Nights". Yes, m'dear, the porn industry is the key. "Are we going to fuck?" Don't forget that Loudon Wainwright III also wrote "I Wish I Was a Lesbian", one of the bestest songs of all time. And he's daddy to Rufus, who kicks with the other foot. Who plays for the purple team. Et cetera. Shit. Apparently, the dyn.ml.org service is shutting down, which means it's time to find a new host, or, better yet, register for a domain name of mine own. Ack. Shiver, even. So my never-functional server is now completely non-functional. Hmm. In a related note, suggest me a domain name, someone. I'm open to anything. - -- Dan Cohen Network Techni-whatever, Retail Flunky, Cable Modem Bee-yotch PC Solutions, Inc. Liverpool, New York http://emeraldsky.dyn.ml.org (no longer functional) UIN:13907258 "The feeling he got from feet was better than sex, but not really sexual." ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 03 Dec 1998 12:18:30 -0500 From: Barbi Subject: O H I O John, I'm from Ohio too. I have mixed feelings about the state; I mean, my cousin who grew up down the street has a job in Michigan and hates it. He is looking for a job in either Columbus, Cincinnati, or Dayton(where we're from). I'm like, "Why Ohio?" I swear, that side of the family thinks the world revolves around Ohio. I live in Columbus. I like Columbus, there's venues that get decent shows, a radio station that I think should get National attention (CD101), my school, OSU, and some stuff to do besides get drunk; so that sums up everything I care about in life (with the exception that my b/f doesn't live here and Ben Folds has never once shown his face to the city). So I guess I'm happy for now. I plan to move south eventually, where it's warmer. But my dream for the summer is to move to Cleveland and get an internship. That would rule. I love the music scene there. Could someone explain to me what the whole deal is with the rubber sled song? No, not the part about "rub her slit" but, wasn't there some weird meaning behind the song or something? Barbi icq 9254077 "Should I marry BFF? I mean I do love them..." -Barbi "You mean to say that you love BFF but only LIKE your boyfriend?" -Matt, Barbi's b/f ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 03 Dec 1998 12:18:30 -0500 From: Barbi Subject: O H I O John, I'm from Ohio too. I have mixed feelings about the state; I mean, my cousin who grew up down the street has a job in Michigan and hates it. He is looking for a job in either Columbus, Cincinnati, or Dayton(where we're from). I'm like, "Why Ohio?" I swear, that side of the family thinks the world revolves around Ohio. I live in Columbus. I like Columbus, there's venues that get decent shows, a radio station that I think should get National attention (CD101), my school, OSU, and some stuff to do besides get drunk; so that sums up everything I care about in life (with the exception that my b/f doesn't live here and Ben Folds has never once shown his face to the city). So I guess I'm happy for now. I plan to move south eventually, where it's warmer. But my dream for the summer is to move to Cleveland and get an internship. That would rule. I love the music scene there. Could someone explain to me what the whole deal is with the rubber sled song? No, not the part about "rub her slit" but, wasn't there some weird meaning behind the song or something? Barbi icq 9254077 "Should I marry BFF? I mean I do love them..." -Barbi "You mean to say that you love BFF but only LIKE your boyfriend?" -Matt, Barbi's b/f ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 03 Dec 1998 23:13:54 EST From: jaedonely@juno.com Subject: AAA! Whose a happy little bunky! Cool shit... 1) The Blues Explosion is playing a free instore next week- I actually was denied entry to one of their shows and the result was that me and my friends terrorized the patrons of RENT with our renditions of Rocky Horror. PERSONAL RETRIBUTION!!!! 2) Big Bad Voodoo Daddy played a free intsore, which was quite cool. And they gave me props since I had an old school album on Big Bad Records. Yay! 3) Rufus Wainwright is coming to town, and my inner pyschic is telling me that he'll do an instore. So much musical fun, I may explode but I got to do homework, its 11pm. My school life in a nutshell- Ive got eons of calculus, which Ive got to do, and a quiz tomorrow mornig, and I cant blow it off, I want the math award. Usually Im the best in math in my class, but a transfer girl comes along, senior year from hong kong, and she's already learned all this shit. Its so disheartening-I hate giving up my position of resident math nerd. And I love this girl, she's a total sweetie, but in math Im jealous of her. It fucking sucks, actually, Im having a hard time with it. Lastly, I have calculus for 80 minutes first thing tomorrow morning, AND the teacher is my mother!!!!! (This gives you some issues.) and I also have to make an 80s tape for school tomorrow. It could've been awesome, but my lush cousin isnt home and my other cousin wont lend me her cd for taping purposes. I live across the street! Im her cousin!! Thats a little anal, eh? Life is so great though!!! YEAH!!! Further emails about how magical today was will follow, just need to focus on school first. Love to love you! ~Elisabeth ___________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com/getjuno.html or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 04 Dec 1998 06:49:00 GMT From: "tavia -" Subject: I have pretty emerald nail polish with glitter on i've just realised that i'm gonna die without the free internet access that being a postgrad gets me jessica: canada .is. overseas if you live in australia but a drug smuggling story would seriously be excellent. in fact it's given me an idea... (*eyes get glazed i've eaten too much sugar look*) dan and jordan: very weird to see y'all on the ma. love that 'we-dont-give-a-shit' attitude anne: thanks v. much. always good to have a sounding board :) carrie: about russel crowe and i quote there being 'something in the water down under that makes for inexplicable sexiness' - -I have an irresistable urge to laugh I have the sad feeling only the sexiest make it into hollowood my pardon to all the very sexy ozzers on the rf. in fact being on the rf makes us all inexplicabley sexy immediately. it's a given. centrelink is a pain in the ass. watched some old (as in 80s) videos last night at a casual dinner party. damn it was funny ('the only way is up...', 'step by step oooh baby...' 'when will i, will I be famous...' etc) but I cannot believe I was so hooked on wham! oh the shame. Oh the white shorts and the hairy brown legs. oh the fluro. yes its 'wake me up before you go-go'! sigh. george michael really is a very ugly man. I was deluding myself for years there. liking fop a bit more. weird to hear it on the radio. go adam spencer off to wreak havoc elsewhere taves 'i get high when trouble arises something in me surrenders and falls I get high when trouble arises i smell trouble i look to the door' yeh tim's still the man. the whitlams there with 'I get high' ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ End of The Rockford Files V1 #325 *********************************