From: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org (The Rockford Files) To: rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Subject: The Rockford Files V1 #194 Reply-To: rockford-files@smoe.org Sender: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk The Rockford Files Saturday, July 25 1998 Volume 01 : Number 194 Today's Filings: ----------------- did i ever tell you i want to be like Courtney? Losing Power Sucks Various RF Posts (OK, Really Only Matthew's!) FANatic Tip o' the day. Katie's hipper tip of the day -Reply ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Fri, 24 Jul 1998 17:10:04 -0400 From: Jessica Brandt Subject: did i ever tell you i want to be like Courtney? Well, i do. Thanks for the BFF tv-schedule. i think it was FL that posted it. okay maybe someone else, on some other BFF mailing list. ah well. i got contacted to send some stuff to BFF...video footage. Me so proud. Of course, all they want to give anyone in return is monetary reimbursement...no hearty thanks from the band. no free passes. just my $3 in S&H. *sigh* I'm on the alt.fan.conan-obrien ng and they are having a problem over there with 14 and 15 year old teenyboppers who are really annoying and cause trouble and piss everyone off. Huh. sound familiar? hmmmm? i interviewed Chuck Folds for the new Shrubbery. bet you can't wait till August 1 to read it, eh??? Jess **************************************************************** I'm not just naked, I'm Naked for Jesus!!! * --+-Read The Shrubbery-+-- * http://www.theshrubbery.prohosting.com --New Every Month- -Humor, News and More-- * Ben Folds Five International Fans Page * http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Backstage/6814/fans.html --Get a "Ben" Pal- -Now Spans 11 Countries-- **************************************************************** ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 24 Jul 1998 09:10:03 -0400 (EDT) From: Eric Patton Subject: Losing Power Sucks Yeah, Kristin, I feel your pain. I haven't had power since Tuesday, and all the food in my fridge is dead. Well, not that there was much food in there to begin with.... Oh yeah, for a little bit of Bentent, I'm starting a small recruiting drive for the COF. Last Friday I had an impromptu party and a couple of my friends crashed at my place (i.e. they were too intoxicated to make it safely out the door. ;> ) I woke up, made them the World's Best French Toast, and made them listen to Satan Is My Master and For Those of Y'all That Wear Fanny Packs. By the end they were just grooving along with it. I have them in the palm of my hand. I just hop my bottom doesn't start to itch, 'cause that's a good way to lose members. (No double entendres meant, I assure you!!!) Anyway, play hopscotch with Eris, my children. She's fun that way. Laters all! ERIC _______________________________________________________________________________ "Reality is retroactive, retrospective, and illusory." -Malignowski _______________________________________________________________________________ ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 24 Jul 1998 07:43:11 -0700 From: "Kamp, Marcus S" Subject: Various RF Posts (OK, Really Only Matthew's!) Matthew wrote, "i accidentally beat to death some half-starved, slightly burnt looking burglar who was crawling around in the real world house attic, with an aluminum baseball bat." Matt, why was he crawling around w/an aluminum baseball bat? And he wrote, "i heard markus whispering something about 'excessive force,' into anne's ear the other day." Hey, so Anne likes excessive force, what can I say?! But wait, there's more..."gossip has anne and markus nude in a tub of peanut butter." WOO-HOO! I love gossip! It always makes my life sound so cool! God, if I lived 1/2 the life gossip says I do, well, I'd live a life resembling my ex-girlfriend's!!! (BAAAAAMMMMM!) I would've responded to more posts, but there were only 4 (that weren't mine) & none of the others fulfilled their obligation to mention my name! What's wrong w/you people?! Do I no longer command the respect, attention, and sexual fantasy that I 1ce did?!?!?! Yeah? Well, forget you, man! All I need to be happy is my dog, Shytehead. And this paddle ball. All I need is my dog, Shytehead, and this paddle ball. & 2 40-ounce bottles of Johnson & Johnson Baby Oil. All I need is my dog, Shytehead, this paddle ball, and 2 40-oz bottles of Johnson & Johnson Baby Oil. And a stuffed frog. All I need is my dog, Shytehead, this paddle ball, 2 40-oz bottles of Johnson & Johnson Baby Oil, and a stuffed frog. And a Shrinky Dink of Anne nude (w/accompanying peanut butter). All I need is my dog, Shytehead, this paddle ball, 2 40-oz bottles of Johnson & Johnson Baby Oil, a stuffed frog, and a Shrinky Dink of Anne nude (w/accompanying peanut butter). And the respect/admiration of all Rockford Filers. OK, OK, that's enough, Nathan. Go away now & let me use the computer again. Since you asked for more advice...well, not really, but I'm givin' it anyway, so LISTEN UP!!!...If you suddenly realize that your ex-boy/girlfriend's a semi-promiscuous, self-centered smoker, then ya prob'ly did the right thing in dumpin' him/her. Have a good weekend, all! ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 24 Jul 1998 12:02:34 EDT From: Keyserdan1@aol.com Subject: FANatic >>"Erik C. Lyons" WRITES: << Don't ask me. Just watch vh1 24-7 until you see it if you are that eager to see it. THEN, I will personally fly to mtv, camp outside until someone sees me and lets me explain to them how BIG of a FANatic you are. >> Bit too late for that. It's been recorded already. - -dan ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 24 Jul 1998 14:26:27 -0500 From: "Scott Schneider" Subject: Tip o' the day. Avoid people with shotguns who are roaming around in your office parking lot. :P Scott ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 24 Jul 1998 16:39:36 EDT From: ILuvRobS@aol.com Subject: Katie's hipper tip of the day Katie's advice: Avoid Scott Schneider in general. He is a scary young man. Yes he is. I am frightened from him. And when I say young, I mean young that my mom goes: "He's 20?! I thought he was 14!" Sandi's life really sucks. You may think it rawks, but I feel sorry for ya Sandi. :) I love sandi, and I send my sympathy. Dan, was it really necessary for you to post a one line post about fanatic? Not even stating you were the one who taped it? I think Erik was just having his FL fun. FL for president? Hmm.. Markus, I will mention you in my post. There. Wait, you use cool abbreviations, like "1ce" that kicks ass by brutha (with a u.. I feel a song coming on...) Mongolian Funk kicks your ass, and mine as well. As and Ass, are very similar. Yes, they are. They sound alike too, is that a homonymn..? Tits and ass, Katie \ ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 24 Jul 1998 16:45:31 -0600 From: "Erik C. Lyons" Subject: -Reply >Katie's advice: Avoid Scott Schneider in general. He is a scary young >man. Yes he is. I am frightened from him. Yes. Scott is scaring me also. Just wait till he jumps out of the closet and scares everyone... >Sandi's life really sucks. You may think it rawks, but I feel sorry for ya >Sandi. :) I love sandi, and I send my sympathy. I, also, feel really bad for the ol' San....things always have a way of working themselves out though, and I see the outcome of this no different... >Dan, was it really necessary for you to post a one line post about fanatic? >Not even stating you were the one who taped it? I think Erik was just >having his FL fun. YES. Someone other than Anne, Markus, Matthew, San, Spencer, Courtney, Special K(athyrIn), etc......see the FL's rambling as nothing more than.....well......rambling.....and, yes, boy-o-boy, FL fun....nothing better or more delicious. >FL for president? Hmm.. Is that a Monica reference? I see you are wearing knee pads. How special. >Markus, I will mention you in my post. There. Wait, you use cool >abbreviations, like "1ce" that kicks ass by brutha (with a u.. I feel a song >coming on...) oh yeah.....markus is a dream, a soaking wet one.... >Mongolian Funk kicks your ass, and mine as well. and my arse! >As and Ass, are very similar. Yes, they are. They sound alike too, is that a >homonymn..? quit sniffin' Elmers. >Tits and ass, uh huh, uh huh, uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh..... pecks and buns - -FL ------------------------------ End of The Rockford Files V1 #194 *********************************