From: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org (The Rockford Files) To: rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Subject: The Rockford Files V1 #158 Reply-To: rockford-files@smoe.org Sender: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk The Rockford Files Friday, June 19 1998 Volume 01 : Number 158 Today's Filings: ----------------- I'm a dumbass Re: The Rockford Files V1 #157 Revved up like a deuce... Arses (What Else Is There?!) Boys on film... My Bff/Atlanta Experience Scott = Dawson Leery Chester J. Lampwick. BF5 Road Rules Re: Chester J. Lampwick. make one up Semitent... ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 06:56:22 -0500 (CDT) From: LaRubia@bigfoot.com (Carrie) Subject: I'm a dumbass Hey there! I know I haven't posted in a while. It's most likely that no one noticed, but I'll announce myself as if they had. "We live in a world of make-believe!!" My magazine job is oozing the life out of me. They call me "receptionist", but then suddenly I'm doing everything BUT receptionizing. Right now they have me doing ad design on Quark Xpress (which I've never used before) from ideas in the salespeoples' heads. "Uh, I think they want, like, the logo here... and then a line here about their, uh, promotional deal... and then, uh, like, how to get to their store. You can just make up something." I'm glad Spencer has become a regular poster. (poster?) He makes me laugh. Regularly. Jake: Don't worry about the Sandi thing. I've never seen anything like that on here before. People only ganged (gung?) up on you about defending the band because we take everything Sandi says with the grain of salt that she DOES love BFF. I think she's just hard on them because she knows they can do better. I feel the same way. In any other case, I think we'd all be in support of your givin' of the love. Plus, you're a damn good sport!! :-) I'm almost done reading the collected works of Jonathan Lethem. He is my hero. He is one of the greatest writers I've ever found. Someday, I will be Jonathan Lethem.... only different. I haven't been having a very BFFul life. For some reason, I've had no invaded dreams, no recent experiences, not accidentally run into anyone who's had recent experiences... It's weird. It's like the Twilight Zone. I'm off to see the Wizard. The wonderful Wizard of Oz. carrie ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 07:09:33 -0500 From: "Scott Schneider" Subject: Re: The Rockford Files V1 #157 >To Scott and other RFers: Does he or does he not look like the guy from >Dawson's Creek? I think he's in denial....Either that or the grits changed his >brain chemistry somehow. Nope. >Ginger: You are evil. Pure evil. Yup. Okay, now that THAT is all out of the way... Loved the script, Kathryn. And I keep lovin' the Atlanta shows... it sends me back to that happy little place every time another person writes a review. I do fear, however, that they're coming to an end soon here... Road Rules always looked like a ton more fun than Real World (from what I've seen of either of them)... they're both obviously scripted, but Real World is just annoying melodrama whereas the Road Rules kids are actually out doing crazy stuff while having all that annoying melodrama. Whoohoo! Fanfic? Oh yeah, I started that like a month ago and gave up on it. Maybe I'll have to check it out again... BENtent: That should be a new product. A big green tent with Ben's face on the side. Uhh, yeah, whatever. I need to get more sleep. Scott ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 09:34:41 -0400 From: Anne Lyons Subject: Revved up like a deuce... ...another runner in the night. Hey! You! I'm back! Not that any of you noticed my abscence, but I was out of the office for a few days and then yesterday I was back, but I had too much catching up to do to write to the RF (*gasp* Not enough time for the RF? Egads! What is Anne's world coming to!). So yeah... anyway... I'm back. And actually, I am wearing a black dress today, so apparently that would make me back in black. On a completely unrelated note: My fingernails are getting too long. I am clicking far too many keys as I try desperately to type fast. I need a manicure! Calgon, take me away! Or is that "Calvin! Take me to a BFF show!" And canIcanIcanIcanI pleeeease join the DSST? Did I even get the letters right? It's something I don't know about so it's just gotta be cooler than me! Well, of course, that's pretty simple to be (cooler than me). Hey! Can that be my anthem? 'Simple To Be (Cooler Than Me)'? Maybe I'll get some cool band, like Matchbox 20, to add the music to my lyrics and then all their fans on their maillist will ask "Who the hell is A. Lyons and why is she thanked on the latest MB20 album?" and then later, someone will complain that acronyms are stupid and what the hell does STB(CTM) stand for anyway? But I digress... To sum up: 1.) My fingernails need to be trimmed. 2.) Calvin, Em, and Sandi -- you guys make me laugh, even though I don't ever know what you are talking about! 3.) My anthem is now STB(CTM). Hmmmmmm... I just re-read that paragraph, and can I just ask one quick question... Does morphine stay in your system and affect your brain for, oh, I dunno, more than three days? Well, I read all the RFs over the past few days and thoroughly enjoyed them. I wanted to comment on a bunch of stuff, but am having trouble remembering everything. Last night I dreamed that my husband got me hooked on heroin by shooting me up while I was sleeping. And I think that the pretend heroin messed up my synapses. I don't think that they are firing at the right rate... But I digress... So... let me try to remember. Kathryn: Loved your video for Jackson! Which reminds me... RFRWH: Where do I send my audition video? I know that I have been tentatively placed in the house already, but since Tina gets kicked out after becoming impregnated by a cross dressing basketball star, I'm not quite sure of my status... so anyway. I taped myself in various stages of undress and I'm ready to send it off to the producers of the newest season of RFRWH. So who do I send that to again? Just to let you know... I would be fulfilling a multitude of roles in the house... I would be the naive dancer from the south/Irish renegade party promoter who passes out in the sand/happy-go-lucky doctor-to-be who falls in love with a housemate/young, cute playwright who can be your best friend/pampered cuban princess whom no one is sorry to see the back of (especially after that naughty shower-based threesome)/rugged opinionated lumberjack who hits on every girl he sees. So I would fulfill those house needs... Dreams: "It's only me who wants to wrap around your dreams..." Sorry that I have been so bad at dream annealysis lately! I need to go back and re-read. So I promise that my next post will include dream stuff, 'Kay? Skyrockets in flight: Oh yes, I remember that song! I actually kind of like it! But for me, it was inextricably bound up with the Brady Bunch episode where every time someone kisses, they show that film clip of fireworks. Ahhhhh yes... early evening Brady rerun watching was a must. Anyway -- back to the song -- anyone else catch the video for that? It must have been on VH1's 8-track Flashback (c'mon, listen to that baseline! I know it's going through your head!). Anyway -- they went with the "2 guys 2 gals, big bellbottom" video concept, which seemed to work for this song... BENcon: I like the shortening of it. But I do think that we need to have a tagline for each new ConBENtion... like, say, oh, I dunno... BENcon '99: The Fanny Pack Experience; or BENcon '99: What Tom & Mary don't know will hurt them. Anyway -- I like the idea of a tagline. Or is my morphine kicking in again? BENcon II: I agree with Matthew. Hawaii sounds good to me. Or Bermuda. Or jolly ol' England. Or Seattle (you can pay me for the plug later, Markus...). Or let's all road trip! We can get a bus and drive cross country... We'll be the Electric Kool Aid Acid Test II: Stop The Bus. We Merry Pranksters will have a grand old time! Whaddya think? AnnieRules: Shhhhhhhhaaaah! As if!!! Nawwwwwwww... you can just call me plain ol' Annie. Or LadySaw. Or whatever. Just not AnnieBananie or AnniePants. But thanks for caring FL! Bellydancing: To whoever said they were having a hard time seeing me dance... Kickstart that imagination, boy! And yes... I am going to start taking lessons... so to whomever offered me the finger cymbals -- Thanks! I already have the sparkly bra and panties... now all I need are the ankle bells and the seethrough skirt and headpiece! Kristin: Glad to hear you are OK! Eris must have been distracted by the potency of Matthew's new brew. I'm sure she is feeling bad, though -- so look for some good karma to be heading your way soon! Matthew: Ummmm... so like I bought a case of your beer, eh? And I drank it, and then at the bottom, I found this mouse, eh? So can I get some free beer? Well, that's all for now! Just Say No To Thugs. - -Annie ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 07:27:55 -0700 From: "Kamp, Marcus S" Subject: Arses (What Else Is There?!) Debra1495 wrote: "Oh, Marcus, I do give a rat's wet, soggy arse! But usually only at Halloween to the neighbor kids. (Who taste like cats!)"...The neighbor kids taste like cats?! And how would you know this, miss Dahmer? John Boyer: You aren't originally from Oklahoma, are you? I played soccer w/a John Boyer as a kid (whether or not we tasted like cats, I just don't know). A: Just a thought...Maple Leaf Rag wasn't the only rag by Scott Joplin, though it's the most famous w/the word "Rag" in the title. There may well have been a "Pineapple Rag", although I may not know what the hell I'm talkin' about. Daarrr! Jen: Joygasm props (do I sound as white as I think I do when I use that word? Oh well, doesn't matter...I'm still the p-hunky p-hat p-hresh bomb! Markus is for the childrens!) go to Eric "Hail Eris" Patton, the smartest Eric Patton in the whole wide state of Michigan, as far as I know. Kathryn: If Meredith Brooks is my puckinsian love child, who's the mother?! Any volunteers?! Clayton: Puck was in SF. There's been no LA cast yet, has there? Courtney, you game? Everyone: In case you've not heard the fun stories (& I don't know why you would since you're all in non-Seattle parts of the world), everyone here HATED the Real World cast. They're a bunch of fuck-stains, if'n ya ask me! There were all these articles about how to piss 'em off, great ideas like going up to the women & hitting on 'em obnoxiously so they'd leave. That woulda worked, but since we're not in KC (Mecca for Sportos who hit on women obnoxiously & women who apparently like it!) guys here don't know how to be truly obnoxious--except for me of course! I was too busy pissing off actual Seattle residents by hitting on them instead. @ any rate, I guess people would see the Real Worldians all over town. They were accompanied everywhere by the requisite camera crew, of course, but also were protected by a better security area than our fair President Clinton. Seriously, there were these huge security types forming a 200-ft perimeter around them everywhere they went, presumable to protect them from all the latte-toting, bike-riding, passive hippies we have here! Now THAT's the Real World! Yup, just like my life! I remember when Mtv paid to have a Pier redecorated into an apartment for me & 7 of the most pretentious people in the world, lined up cheesy midnight radio spots for all of us, & gave us our own Secret Service agents to accompany us rock climbing--that SURE was fun!!! Marcus Kamp TS Documentation Marcus.Kamp@PSS.Boeing.com 425.957.5122 m/c 7M-AT ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 12:51:53 +0100 From: Jay Reddick Subject: Boys on film... Hi y'all! Had this rolling around in my head for awhile, based on a post by the beloved Anne not long ago, and she FINALLY convinced me to go through with it... Favorite movies. We all have those movies that make us laugh, make us cry, that move us. For me, the one most moving film ever made is: Airplane! hehehe Just kidding...please, no flames. No, Anne got me going on Bull Durham, which is a big favorite, but The Princess Bride just has to be the end-all be-all (Have you the wing?) That film is the reason William Goldman is my favorite writer, and the reason I may someday get into screenplays. Others at or near the top of the list: Field of Dreams (which is SOO much more than a baseball movie), Contact, A Fish Called Wanda, The Shawshank Redemption, and Mr Holland's Opus (because I had to have one sappy film on my list). I could go on (and on and on) but I'd rather hear from you guys. Share your movie memories! :) Take care, Jay PS. Ohhhh, Bentent: The Truth About Cats and Dogs was cute, while Godzilla was mostly a forgettable film even though I had a good time seeing it. Oh, and I'm insanely jealous of those who went to Atlanta...you don't know how close I came to calling in sick to work and driving 6 hours for that. ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 13:11:36 -0400 From: Jaki Hsieh Subject: My Bff/Atlanta Experience Hehe, I feel guilty :P Okie I must confess to all those who were looking for me inside the concert and couldnt find me. There is a good reason why you couldnt find me... I wasnt there. *duck* As I sat in front of the Tabernacle at 5:00 and pondered at least two more hours of this 90 degree weather on my incredibly white skin, I had to leave. It was too hot and Mark wanted to run errands. So off me and Mark went, to the grocery store then to his dorm, where it was nice and cool and comfy. Time passed by, eventually, Mark and I both realized that we didnt really wanna go to concert anymore, we had met all the people and wanted to spend some time alone, we hadnt really had much time before then considering it took us 8 hours to move and 4 hours to set up the next day. So we ditched the concert and had a nice time eating dinner by candlelight and listening to mushy music :) It was sweet, I dont regret ditching the concert at all, even though benny played "Evaporated". And if any of you have caught me whining in #benfoldsfive on IRC about my relationship, you will know that we *really* needed that nite. It was great. My obsession for Ben has subsided quite a bit since then (notice no more Ben. anti-idle msgs?). Sorry to have ditched you guys, it was fun meeting u! And i did at least see Ben so it was all in all okie :P Jaki ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 14:24:24 EDT From: ILuvRobS@aol.com Subject: Scott = Dawson Leery To all the RFers out there - Hi, my name's Katie, and I'm an idiot. Yes it's very true. I'm not even sure if this post posted, that's how much of an idiot I am. There's much more to me though. I'm 16, and I've been to more Ben Folds Five shows than my age. My mom is my hero. My favorite Ben Folds Five member is Leo. The only reason he's my favorite (crew)member is because of his awesome new haircut. Anyway, there was so much use of my name on this wonderful little mailing list, I figured I needed to post. Anyway, I've been subscribed to this thing for quite a while now. I never post, because I'm shy. I also have this complex that wherever I go people leave. I didn't want to ruin the RF by coming and everybody leaving like I'm a carrier of the Bubonic Plague. Only it's a new strain of the the Bubonic Plague, it's like the SUPER Bubonic Plague. Yes.. as you can tell there IS indeed something wrong with me. I also needed to post about the whole Scott = Dawson thing. I am convinced of the fact that Scott (yes, our Scott) is Dawson Leery. Actually he's more of a Jim Carey/Dawson Leery hybrid. Only he has short hair. Scott use to have longer hair, and so did Dawson, but they both got it cut. It's almost the same style. (How the hell does she know so much about Dawson's Creek?) Maybe Scott isn't Dawson, but he sure as hell looks like him. Who wants to back me up on this one? (Kathryn? Ginger? Anyone?) Atlanta was awesome. Waiting in line was awesome. I have a question.. are any of those guys that were home schooled on this list? I would really like to e- mail the guy who looked like the kid from 7th Heaven. The resemblence was uncanny. (Yes, I'm being raised on the WB.. problem?) Ginger and I met this awesome biker security guy who had that best bike I've ever seen. It was classic. We got pictures of us with him and the bike. The security was done by "Polite But Firm." I think they do a lot of southern shows. I too was in the venue, but I wasn't stalking the band (:P) I was just getting cooled off, and amazon lady with the 3 inch heels, that made her look like she was 7 foot, chased us off. Politely saying, get the hell out of here. The show was very cool, I got to give Ben his tornado in a bottle, which made my day. The skank I could've done without though. I would just like to give mad props to Ginger, Sara (and all her friends), Lucy (even though I didn't meet her), Sanders, Kim, and anyone else that kept me entertained and happy in line. So that was my first post. It's quite possible I might post again. Oh, and anyone on AOL, we usually all go into a chatroom and make fun of each other for hours on end. We usually participate in this activity nightly at like 10 est. We would love it if you would join us.. we're running out of people to make fun of. (And no, I'm not "Bangli") - - Katie "Before I came along, all cartoon animals did was play the ukulele. I changed all that" - Chester J. Lampwick (If you tell me where that's from you will be my hero) ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 14:15:48 -0500 From: "Scott Schneider" Subject: Chester J. Lampwick. >"Before I came along, all cartoon animals did was play the ukulele. I changed >all that" - Chester J. Lampwick (If you tell me where that's from you will be >my hero) The Simpsons! Okay, where's my prize? Abusing loose-mail format like a mofo, Scott (read: not Dawson). ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 15:34:10 EDT From: Sandibrady@aol.com Subject: BF5 Road Rules Well, I actually have to leave to pick up the kid I'm watching (this is my last day and tomorrow starts my regular nannying schedule because we're picking her family up tonight at the airport, they've been in Spain for 2 weeks and she's been with me 24/7) from Tennis Camp.... BUT I just read the Files and had to say that I LOVE Jessica's idea of Road Rules...I especially love the part where she says I get to be the one who breaks a new boy's heart in every city. Woo-hoo! BF5 Road Rules, here I come! More later.... Oh, and one more thing: Chips Ahoy for sure Emily! ha! I laughed when I read that! Betcha bite a Chip...or at least, I bet that I bite Chip. San **for those who might get pissed off because they don't get that last part, it's in reference to a boy named Chip, who I might add lives right here in Kentucky. Giddyup!** ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 12:41:11 PDT From: "Courtney Knopf" Subject: Re: Chester J. Lampwick. > >>"Before I came along, all cartoon animals did was play the ukulele. >>I changed all that" - Chester J. Lampwick (If you tell me where >>that's from you will be my hero) > >The Simpsons! Okay, where's my prize? > >Abusing loose-mail format like a mofo, > >Scott (read: not Dawson). Dammit Dawson--er, I mean Scott!! You beat me to it. But I'll have you all know that I went to the same high school that Matt Greoning went to, so yeah me. my journalism teacher (Mr. Bailey) was the inspiration for Mr. Burns, and Matt's sister Lisa's name is still on her in-box in the journalism class. Oh yeah, and I heard that Elliot Smith went to my high school too. I KNOW i have more to say, but I can't think of it to save my life. Maybe later. ~Courtney The Sultraness of Swing "George? She's toast." ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 18:05:50 -0400 (EDT) From: Ginger Nance Subject: make one up Kathryn: you may think I'm evil (only allowed to be said in the MC Simon Milligan voice, though), but you don't even know the truth! I think Dawson, I mean Scott, is starting to figure it out, though. Anyway, your video was so freakin' awesome. I bow down in humble awe! Jay: how dare you get me started on movies?! Okay, I'll give a short list of some of my faves: Breakfast at Tiffany's, Say Anything, Pulp Fiction, Shag, Swing Kids...okay, I'll stop now. To end the prop-i-ness that has been going on: props to anyone who has given me props recently. Love y'all, mean it! And Sara, you'd better send me a tape of that Semisonic LiveX session! Random thought: I love bands that are still so small that one of their members sends you e-mails, and the mailing list has like 20 people. Everyone remember Picture Pages? I'm thinking about doing BFF picture pages. I got bored at work the other day and started doing a picture version of the lyrics to Kate in publisher, it looks really cute! What do y'all think? RF on MTV shows..that would kick ass! We'd show this country what it's all about! Okay, time for me to go bye-bye. Ginger :) Ooooo Ginger Nance ( ) ginger_nance@unc.edu ) ( http://www.unc.edu/~gnance (o) GO HEELS!! ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 19:08:10 EDT From: FieryLox@aol.com Subject: Semitent... Doesn't that sound...dirty? That's my point...sorry for the decidedly non- Bentent, but for anyone who's seen Semisonic live, don't you think that they've got to be one of the most sexually charged bands ever? Sheesh! Dan Wilson does that sexy little dance when he's playing the guitar, and Jon (despite that -shudder- moustache of his!) has a rather...um, rousing voice. Come on! My friend didn't understand what "Completely Pleased" was about...until Dan explained it--very revealingly. (is that a word?) Toodles! Sara ------------------------------ End of The Rockford Files V1 #158 *********************************