From: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org (The Rockford Files) To: rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Subject: The Rockford Files V1 #83 Reply-To: rockford-files@smoe.org Sender: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-rockford-files-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk The Rockford Files Sunday, April 12 1998 Volume 01 : Number 083 Today's Filings: ----------------- Irony in LA Fresh Air " Mulder, you've got to stop this "red thread" before it's too late!!" SMOE.ORG LIST MEMBERS PLEASE READ: fund raiser to keep smoe.org running :-) Ben Folds mention on Entertainment Weekly Online Yeesh. Have I posted enough? ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Sat, 11 Apr 1998 03:57:57 -0400 From: Carrie Subject: Irony in LA Hola, todos! I just got back from the late night show of "LA Confidential" - -- an excellent film, I've seen it before, but this time I kind of realized that the script was written on the premise of "How many ironic situations can we put into two and a half hours?" This is, of course, not to say I didn't enjoy it. Russell Crowe makes the whole thing. Smooth and intense as fuck, just like in "Virtuosity" (the most underrated pop film in history). Oh, Russell Crowe! When will you receive your dues? The girl down the hall and I spent an hour backstroking tonight (I mean in the POOL, Erik), and if I keep this up, I may need therapy. My weights class ended, so I have to figure out a way to stay buff for all the Case men (oh, and what CHOICE men they are!!) who are slaying each other by the dozen for the chance to take me out for an expensive wining and dining experience.* ("Oh where are the simple joys of maidenhood?" - Camelot reference) [Carrie's roommate's out of the country, as she's mentioned, so Carrie's a bit bored. Please forgive her meaningless faffing about (Anybody remember where we learned THAT word?? 20 points to the weiner.), and tell her to take her pointless postings to that *other* mailing list.] Oh, jeez. It's 4 am and I don't know where my cat is.** Carrie * - facetiousness. Case men are idiots, all. My goddess-like aura must be blinding them.*** ** - I don't have a cat. *** - again, facetiousness. Isn't it funny how this cycles?**** **** - I love footnotes, even more than I love Russell Crowe.***** ***** - lie ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Apr 1998 05:04:58 -0400 From: Kristin Klevering Subject: Fresh Air My Daddy left me the sweetest message on my voice mail at work on Thursday! He was calling from his car phone, letting me know that he heard "this interview, and a song even" from Ben Folds Five on NPR just now. He described Ben as a "reasonable character" (my Dad is really sarcastic), and said that he enjoyed the interview. Too weird coming from a 56 y/o man! I just think he's relieved I'm out of my death music/NIN phase. I don't know if anyone has posted about this yet, but the NPR's Fresh Air sight has the interview in real audio. It wasn't ready as of 7:00 last night, but I know it should be soon. Link on Frank's page, if anyone is interested. Squirrel Nut Zippers - I have a co-worker (middle aged fat bastard) who has kids who like them, and keeps asking me about BFF, since they're from the same town. I guess he thinks he's cool because he knows about the Squirrel Nut Zippers - NOT! Normally, I plunk a mix tape in the hands of any co-worker who shows the slightest interest in hearing BFF, but not this dude. He undermined what little authority I have when I took a sick day, and that made me mad (yes, I hold grudges). I work at a veterans hospital and adore everyone I've ever had the pleasure of working with, except for 2 people (this guy is one of the two), so I don't think I'm all that horrible of a person. It's so nice hearing the birds chirp in the morning again - spring is really here! Later - Kristin ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Apr 1998 06:23:07 EDT From: Snowwite67 Subject: " Mulder, you've got to stop this "red thread" before it's too late!!" Alrighty, I was in Tower today and I had two...that's two two two, Ben Folds Five experiences in one!! First off, I always look at the BFF section to see how many of their Cds are in stock and if there are any "misplaced" singles or something. Just your regular obessive behavior, nothing new. Anyways, I notice a sticker on all the first albums and NBP albums. It says " warning, this cd DOES NOT contain the song 'Brick' ". Okay, 'nough said about that. I'll leave you guys to ponder over this one. :) Okay so, then I go to the counter to ask for the Propellerheads cd, (they were hiding it from me, I swear!!), and what do I see concealed behind the cash register, but a WEAEA promotional display. It says all this stuff about entering to win an autographed poster by the boys. Okay this is cool, I enter, even though I already have one, you can never have too many, ya know. I also enter 5 of my closest friends, for selfish reasons of course. They damn well better give me that poster if they win! But I digress, that's when I notice that each WEAEA cd purchase comes with a free BFF " Brick" key chain and coolest of all, a BFF sticker!! Okay, Ive got to have this, but of course I already have WEAEA and I don't have enough money to buy another, plus that'd be kinda dumb. Not one to be easily defeated, I notice that a key chain and sticker are taped to the display. Now, keep in mind, that the Tower people have already been watching me, so I couldn't just take it, plus I would NEVER EVER steal! :) So, pointing at the sticker, I say to the guy at the counter "Can I have this?". He looks around, for his manager I suppose, and says, "sure, why not.". Deciding to press my luck, I then point to the key chain and ask, "Can I have this too?". He rips it off the display and hands it to me. Finally I point to the whole display, ( it was a picture of the cover of WEAEA), smile and ask, "Can I have this?". He just gave me a look. << They were ALL in red shirts, and Ben was writing "Ben Folds Five" on glass in front of them in RED paint.... I tell you this is getting really wierd!!! >> I knew it! I knew it! It All means something! And I think it has something to do with the final episode of the X-Files! l'm sure it will all be explained in the upcoming X-Files movie entitled " The Red Scare part 2." Okay, that's not that funny. I always think I'm being funny and then I read it and I'm like, "damn, I'm not funny." - -Lauren " In time the Rockies may crumble, Gibraltar may tumble, they're only made of clay, But Our Love is Here to Stay."- Gershwin ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Apr 1998 14:22:38 -0400 From: Mike Connell Subject: SMOE.ORG LIST MEMBERS PLEASE READ: fund raiser to keep smoe.org running :-) Hello everyone on the Ben Folds Five mailing list :-) Some of you may know me, most don't. My name is Mike Connell and I manage the Jewel and Patty Griffin lists here at smoe.org. My purpose for writing you today is to ask for your assistance in a project/fund raiser to help keep smoe.org up and running for many more years to come. A gentle bloke by the name of Jeff Wasilko owns smoe.org, and while he does have a merry band of smoe-elves to help him in various tasks in operating the system, Jeff has always paid the operating costs (NOT a small penny) and of course had paid for the expensive equipment it presently runs on. He's always offered this service for free since day one....no user fees....no list owner fees...totally free :-) Many of your favorite artists and their fans have benefited from this service as smoe.org hosts lists for such artists as Happy Rhodes, Paula Cole, Jewel, Patty Griffin, Tori Amos, Thomas Dolby, Poe, Susan Werner, Leah Andreone, Lucious Jackson, Maria Callas, the Indigo Girls, Shawn Colvin, the new Ben Folds Five list and many, many more. Some of these once unknown artists, and more to come I'm sure, had their internet presence begin right here at smoe.org :-) For a complete list of which artists have mailing lists hosted at smoe.org, you can go to http://www.smoe.org/lists At the present moment Jeff is looking into replacing the hardware smoe.org operates on with more modern equipment, as the present workhorses are a pair of seven year old SUN Sparc stations. Being seven years old is pretty much dinosaur age in computer terminology (smoeasauruses?), and these systems are acting older than their age. This replacement is necessary to get newer and better equipment in place before the present smoe.org falls down and goes boom permanently, leaving the lists at smoe.org temporarily without a home :-) As you might imagine, this replacement is going to cost a pretty penny. On other list servers this would be no problem, as money would be used from the user fees. However since such fees don't exist here at smoe.org, we are asking for your help in the form of donations. We are not asking for buku bucks here, just whatever you can give, whether it be $1, $2, $5, $10....whatever. You can send a check, a money order, or if a buck or two or three you can send cash (that is your choice) Money orders are a piece of cake. (At least in the USA) They don't have a large fee at all, generally less than a buck, sometimes as low as 35 cents....although money orders from banks usually carry a larger fee (go figure ;-) Your best bet for a money order (in the USA) would be from the US Post Office....all money orders there have an 85 cent fee no matter what the dollar amount of the money order is. *** All checks or money orders should be made out to Jeff Wasilko :-) FOREIGN (Non-USA) LIST MEMBERS: I'm not sure at all what is the best method for you folks. We are open for suggestions. I know that the USA Post Offices cash Canadian Postal money orders, so no problem there, Jeff can cash them there. Of course, any foreign cash sent in can easily be exchanged at a bank. From what he told me, his bank has a 15$ surcharge on any overseas money order cashed, so this option is out. If you have any ideas, please write me and I'll discuss the best ones with Jeff and mention them in a follow up post to all the lists next week. ********************** HOW TO DONATE: ********************** Simple :-) Just send what you want (no Monopoly money please) to me at Mike Connell PO Box 1206 Binghamton NY 13902-1206 and I'll tally up all the figures etc and send it all on to Jeff :-) In your envelope, please include a note that contains your full name, the list(s) you belong to, and your email address you use here at smoe.org Please help in this mission to give smoe.org a new home :-) If you have any questions, please feel free to write me and ask. I thank you all in advance :-) Mike "Once a bell ringer, always a bell ringer" Connell :-) ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 11 Apr 1998 16:55:07 -0400 From: Carrie Subject: Ben Folds mention on Entertainment Weekly Online Hey there! Just a quick note to say the Burt Bacharach thing was covered by EW Online, whose main article focus was on Ben Folds. They spoke briefly with him and about the rest of the bands involved. Here's the URL: ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 12 Apr 1998 00:29:48 EDT From: Lennonita Subject: Yeesh. I leave for a week and what happens? I get a box full of RF's I'll never fully appreciate with such topics as Kids in the Hall, which I happen to love. Some timing I've been cursed with...To incorporate every single thing into one sentence: I had a Dave Foley phase; Sausages is hysterical; I have had KITH dreams...I think that's all. I just deleted all my MA's. I'm sure I missed nothing. I did NOT get BFF singles from England. Wahh. I, however, did get to spend the night in a recreation centre (British spelling!)--kind of a gym/aerobics place with a mini food court, sort of...and no phones that worked. I had to deal with a million surly international operators to get five freckin minutes of airtime with my boyfriend-- that served as a temporary shelter in Stratford-on-Avon sleeping on tumbling mats under a scratchy reject army blanket when massive flooding closed all the roads back to London. (I also re-broke my toe last night. Such a fun trip...) To prevent myself from further hysterical breakdown, I, with a little inspiration from my newly Foldsdified (new word!) brother, wrote a song lamenting our condition to the tune of "Underground." Since NO ONE ELSE ON THE ENTIRE TRIP knew that song...this is really its first premiere for an audience who understands. Hope you enjoy: "Shelter" We were never dry all day. The rain just seemed to flow and flow. (Insert guy yelling, "Rain doesn't flow!") And now it's been three hours We're still wondering where to go. Though we're tired and lost We've got it sossed But now it looks like snow, oh no... Hand me my backpack! (Can we be warm yet?) Show me the snack bar... (Can we be warm yet?) We can be happy in the shelter! Who's got the mats? Who's got the blankets? Who's got everything? I got this pain in my heart, that's all. Hey you, with the wet and soggy pants Oh, there's gotta be something else And let me tell you something else There was a van that passed us by It was real dry, but we were sad And we cried real loud Don't you cry, no, no Go, go, to the shelter And now there's a place to go It's the kid corral It's a sleepover It's the only thing I dry my tears...and I sing: Shelter! Shelter! ooo... Everything's crappy in the shelter You feel kicked around Did El Nino bring you down here? We can be happy in the shelter... And we'll be decked in yesterday's clothes With nasty teeth and morning breath Every girl and every boy's got a mohawk from sleeping on their greasy hair Left my contacts in *ouch!* They're stuck to my eyes No heat (brr!) We're beat (brr!) Alright, England, you win... Repeat chorus, etc. Also in the news...yours truly scored 1590 on the SAT's. Know where I'm going to college? Any damn place I want to! Hah! *Ahem*. Sorry. Had to do that. And one final bit: on a whim we also wrote bad haikus today about the trip. My favourites are below: My toe hurts. What a fluke that I broke it again. Duct tape surrounds it. Lucky us. We lived. No hypothermia. Just cold mats on the floor. The boy who can make techno noises is envied by all. Such a thrill. Special guest appearance haikus: By Jolyn: Yay Megan! Fifteen hundred and ninety. She will be killed in her sleep. By Max: Testicachubie Testicachubalito So many names: love That last one's an inside joke with us, but it's fun to say. Thus concludes my monster post. It's good to be back, it's good to be back... Meg "The only real difference between 1590 and 1600 is the bragging rights. But I wanted those bragging rights!" --me ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 12 Apr 1998 00:40:55 -0400 From: Carrie Subject: Have I posted enough? I'm apologize -- I'm in a "my roommate's out of town and I have nothing better to do with my sorry ass than see movies and post to the Rockford Files" phase. I'll grow out of it. "City of Angels" - Horrendous puking tripe. Extremely well filmed, but the sickeningly pathetic excuses for character development and plot made me barf. Take every mooning puppydog achy look Nicholas Cage has ever emitted and pair it with every puzzled-yet-coming-to-some-realization flip of the head Meg Ryan has ever flipped and tie it together with an ultra-lame and frighteningly predictable eternal-love-really-does-exist-dammit story and you have the giant lump of steaming shit that I just paid six whole bucks to go see. I got several good guffaws out of it, though, so I shouldn't be so negative. ("Is he gonna eat all those pears in one night??") And, it's kinda fun to see the shameless product endorsements (Ben and Jerry's, Pepsi, American Express, Rolling Rock...). A genuine Ben Folds Five related question -- does anyone own the vinyl version of any of the albums? I tried to get the self-titled vinyl from CDNow, but they couldn't find it after 30 days and cancelled my order. If you do have it, could someone email me and tell me where/how you got it?? Thanks!! Carrie (Sorry for the film downer; I needed to vent, and the girls I went with cried. :-Þ ) ------------------------------ End of The Rockford Files V1 #83 ********************************