From: owner-good-noise-digest@smoe.org (good-noise-digest) To: good-noise-digest@smoe.org Subject: good-noise-digest V9 #26 Reply-To: good-noise@smoe.org Sender: owner-good-noise-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-good-noise-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk good-noise-digest Wednesday, September 13 2006 Volume 09 : Number 026 Today's Subjects: ----------------- Re: a few more chord files ["steven mcgraw" ] St. Peter joke [] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Tue, 12 Sep 2006 08:56:00 -0400 From: "steven mcgraw" Subject: Re: a few more chord files Disgusting, Gina; how could those priests be so disrespectful?! Steve >From: Gina Golde >Reply-To: good-noise@smoe.org >To: good-noise@smoe.org >Subject: Re: a few more chord files >Date: Mon, 11 Sep 2006 14:40:51 -0700 (PDT) > >Holy Cow! (BTW, have you seen the mini cows for pets?). Greg, that is >quite an effort you put into that site. I have never seen it. Since I >don't even know how to spell gutar, it was probably something that I would >never have known about. At the concert the other night, John pulled out >his binder of songs and I wanted to go right up there and make him promise >that he had made copies of everything in there. I heard that he once lost >his music that was in a binder and couldn't remember a lot of it. > > OK. I have decided to tell my joke at the risk of being offensive, >although some of you might find it a rather loose association to my >previous posts. > > Three priests are going on a train trip to Pittsburg. One priest walks >up to the ticket window and finds a buxom, female cashier in a low cut, >tight blouse. He says, I would like 3 tickets to Titsburgh. He >immediately realizes what he has said and leaves in and embarrassed rush. >So, the second priest goes up to the window and says, I would like 3 >tickets to Pittsburg and I would like my change in nipples and dimes. He >turns several shades of red and walks away and asks the third priest to >please get the tickets and warns him not to make the same mistakes as this >is their last chance. The third priest walks up to the window and says, I >would like to buy 3 tickets to Pittsburg and I would like my change in >nickels and dimes. He then adds, Young lady, if you dont start dressing >more appropriately, Saint Finger is going to shake his Peter at you. > > Ba-dump-bump! > > > >Greg Steele wrote: > Just a note to folks who have asked, I've added the balance of the songs >from Old Futures Gone to my site: >http://www.gregorysteele.com/index.php?section=25&cat=3 > >You might want to save that link, since it is a little different from the >link on gypsylife and other sites. > >I haven't had a chance to hear the new CD yet, so give me a little time on >that one... :) >Greg ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 13 Sep 2006 00:13:57 -0700 From: Subject: St. Peter joke Forgive me folks, I am posting another St. Peter joke. If you don't want to read it, don't. While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you." "No problem, just let me in," says the man. "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity." "Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator. "I'm sorry, but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises... The eleva tor goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him. "Now it's time to visit heaven." So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. "Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity." The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell." So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above. The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. "I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lo bster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?" The devil smiles and says, :Yesterday we were campaigning, today you voted. ------------------------------ End of good-noise-digest V9 #26 *******************************