From: owner-fegmaniax-digest@smoe.org (fegmaniax-digest) To: fegmaniax-digest@smoe.org Subject: fegmaniax-digest V7 #395 Reply-To: fegmaniax@smoe.org Sender: owner-fegmaniax-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-fegmaniax-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk fegmaniax-digest Tuesday, October 20 1998 Volume 07 : Number 395 Today's Subjects: ----------------- For Squeeze fans (-100% RH) [tanter ] Re: More Meat [dlang ] List sucking [dlang ] Re: Beeb & drugs [dlang ] Re: Hoo [dlang ] This list sucks so much that I travelled 300 miles to meet some of the members [Natalie Jacobs ] all about my drugs [LORDK@library.phila.gov] Quadrozepplia [John Irvine ] More drugs [LORDK@library.phila.gov] Re: 100% Hoo [Michael R Godwin ] Drugs last word [LORDK@library.phila.gov] Re: This List Sucks! [RPI] [lj lindhurst ] Re: This List Sucks! [Ross Overbury ] This Sucky List (1% RH, 0% Firesign Theater, RPI) [Ethyl Ketone ] Re: This list sucks [Stephen Buckalew ] When I Was Dead [Mike Runion ] Re: This List Sucks! [Ross Overbury ] Re: This Sucky List (1% RH, 0% Firesign Theater, RPI) [Gary Assassin Subject: For Squeeze fans (-100% RH) DOMINO!!!! INTRODUCING SONGS FROM THE FORTHCOMING ALBUM BE A PART OF THE CELEBRATION AS SQUEEZE KICKS OFF THEIR 30-DATE UK TOUR WITH A VERY EXCLUSIVE one-off warm-up show at The Amersham Arms in New Cross. We are pleased to announce a very exclusive warm-up gig for SQUEEZE before they set off for the forthcoming 30-date UK tour. It will take place on FRIDAY, 6 NOVEMBER at THE AMERSHAM ARMS in New Cross, SE London. This will give hard core fans and local people the chance to see the new set & line-up in the intimate surroundings of a South London pub! We hope that many fans will travel far and wide to get to the show - which, for most of you, will be the first live sightings of SQUEEZE for two years. As this is a warm-up show, it CANNOT BE ADVERTISED on national radio/tv or in the press - so we are relying on local press coverage and most importantly word of mouth. Fan Club members will receive details in the very near future - but if you know of anyone who would be interested in going - & does not have access to the Internet - please let them know. The evening's details are as follows: DATE: Friday, 6 November 1998 VENUE: The Amersham Arms 388 New Cross Road New Cross LONDON SE14 TEL: 0181-692 2047 TICKETS: ｣8.50 in advance (must be collected by 8pm) ｣10.00 on the door DOORS: 8.00pm - 2.00am SQUEEZE are currently working at their studio in Blackheath putting the finishing touches to 'Domino' - their first studio album for three years. The album will be out in time for the tour and will be on sale at all shows. 'Domino' has been recorded in six weeks with the new SQUEEZE line-up including Hilaire Penda on bass and two more local lads - Ash Soan on drums and Christopher Holland on keyboards. This exclusive show will give local people a unique opportunity to see the new set and line-up before they take the show to the four corners of the UK. The night will feature a mixture of material from the forthcoming album, all the old favourites from their early days such as 'Up theJunction', 'Cool for Cats' and 'Pulling Mussels' and more recent hits such as 'This Summer' and 'Electric Trains'. ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 21:56:03 +0930 From: dlang Subject: Re: More Meat Dani piped : >Mr Godwin (for some reason you demand more respect than the rest of this rabble): Thats because he's older thats why, mein gott, he's even older than me!. You SHOULD have respect for your elders ......myself excepted of course, my daughter is constantly telling me how stupid I am and I believe she's an excellent judge of character-(although I think its the Robyn lyrics I've taken to singing out loud around the house that are influencing her opinion of late). Dani then floored me with her opinion of Mr Loaf >Actually, you know, he looked pretty OK in the Spice Girls movie. Dani ,what were you on when you saw that movie ?. I thought you said you didn't do any drugs ? dave ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 21:56:19 +0930 From: dlang Subject: List sucking I think we all ought to thank Roger Jackson for getting everyone all worked up and defensive about our wondrous list . Especially since there were only about three posts the whole weekend, its stirred everything up quite nicely . I vote we make him a life member or better still , he can take over cult status from the Quail and Carl Palmer. This list is definitely the best I've encountered,from the point of personalities and content. Looking through the old posts , I'd say its a much more interesting list than it was around three years ago, when there was far more of the navel gazing re tapes, discography , etc.Others may disagree , but in general I believe this is a pretty healthy forum and it holds my increasingly vapid attention span far more than the other lists. To mis-quote an old lager advert some Brits may remember ' Fegmaniax refreshes the parts that other lists cannot reach " ! dave ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 21:58:18 +0930 From: dlang Subject: Re: Beeb & drugs James wrote >it's pretty clear from most indicators that alcohol falls behind >LSD but ahead of the others in terms of long term direct damage. I find that very surprising . Can you elaborate ?.Do you refer to physical damage , psychological consequences , or both ? I have known one or two people to have lasting damage after using acid , but IMHO booze is far more damaging , especially if you factor in car crashes, its propensity to lead to violence and long term damage to major organs, not that I'd recommend any drugs really,they all have downsides in the long run. dave np Patti Smiff, fillmore 98-nice! ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 22:06:14 +0930 From: dlang Subject: Re: Hoo Eb sed >I mean, Tommy is a damn wanky >story, when you isolate it apart from the cool tunes.. Hey , I agree with Eb for once !I sold Tommy years ago. However, Tommy could be bloody great onstage and I must admit the Who were a wonderful live outfit, especially late 60's and early 70's. Best gig I saw , Albert Hall, same day as the Stones in the park, we ran to the Albert hall from Hyde park to catch the full set and the Who just blew us completely away. One of the finest shows I've ever seen, especially after the rotten show the Stones gave that day. However , the Chuck Berry fans in the audience ( Chuck shared the bill ) hated the Who and they pelted Roger with pennies, such ingratitude !.... Ah memories dave . ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 09:10:27 -0400 From: Natalie Jacobs Subject: This list sucks so much that I travelled 300 miles to meet some of the members It's a five hour trip from Ann Arbor to Chicago. The train stops in such noted places as Battle Creek, Kalamazoo, and... Dongwiac (sp?!). I was planning to immerse myself in Mircea Eliade's "Studies in Comparative Religion," but of course I ended up just sleeping and/or listening to Brian Eno (essential train-listening music), Olivia Tremor Control, and, as the train pulled into Union Station, "Underwater Moonlight." Ed Doxtator met me at the station - though "met" may be a misnomer as I walked right past him, paused uncertainly, and walked back again, in the classic mailing-list meeting-for-the-first-time manuever. Perhaps "blunder" would be a better word. We were soon joined by Kristy, aka Zloduska, who offered descriptions of her home town of Madison that sounded so much like Ann Arbor that I started to wonder whether they were actually the same city. Most of our afternoon was taken up with record shopping - fortunately Ed's knowledge of really good record stores made up for the fact that it was pissing down rain and we were all soaked. I bought records by Gorky's Zygotic Mynci, the Verlaines, and the Bats, mining that Wales/New Zealand angle of which James Dignan is so fond. Then it was on to Susan's house, where we drank EB beer, went through Bayard's box of party favors (that tinfoil Oscar Wilde is looking *very* mangy - I'll have to make a new one), ate very good, cheap Mexican food, and talked to Terry Marks, who seemed unnerved by us. (Hell, I would be...) Susan and Terry's description of the conversation is accurate, though we did differ on our favorite Monkee, and I stuck up for Paul McCartney a little bit by pointing out that he wrote "For No-One." And yes, we (the female Fegs) did agree that Rufus was easy on the eyes, though Kristy found the revelation of his sexual orientation to be somewhat distressing. I think she's gotten over it, though. :) Terry, by the way, has never laughed and gotten beer up his nose. I feel this is important somehow. Ed had to leave at around 11:00 so he could catch the train, and after that, we talked to Randi for a long time. It was generally agreed by Randi and Susan that Robyn is a good-looking fellow (though they didn't use *quite* those words :). I was fairly neutral on the subject. Then it was time for bed, and the next day I went and hung out with my high school friend Kim, who turned me on to Tom Waits and the Velvet Underground when I was fifteen. He showed me around Wicker Park a little bit and urged me repeatedly to move to Chicago. I'm definitely starting to think he's right. On the way home, I read "High Fidelity," which was OK but a bit dreary. It needed more bite to it somehow - I can't put my finger on it. I also listened to "Invisible Hits" and found that I still don't like a lot of it. And that's all that happened. So: thanks to Ed for the record shop tour, to Susan for being an excellent host, to Susan's SO for all his help with navigation and maps and things, to Terry and Randi for tolerating our babbling, to Bayard for the goodies, and to anyone else I've forgotten. God, I hate this list. ;) n. p.s. I finally picked up a copy of "Glass Flesh" - it rocks! Mark, you sound so... so normal. Um. That didn't come out right, did it? Anyway, I like it. ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 08:12:27 -0500 From: "Bret" Subject: Re: This List Sucks! >Greetings Fegmaniax, simple solution my friend; don't read the list. - -b ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 9:24:37 -0400 From: LORDK@library.phila.gov Subject: all about my drugs I am completely ambivilent about what drugs do to you. If one could take them in a discipled way, alittle mesc here, pot here and there,and my old favorite, concoctions of amphetimines,opium based pain killers, with alchohol and pot to smoothe out the edges--then all might be almost well. Because of drugs I was able to shuck off my conditioned identity . But to make a new self which will stand on firm foundations, far firmer than your original close-minded self--you need to be staight. This is harder than it seems, because most people who have used drugs sufficently to be changed by them--end up with an addiction problem of one sort or another. Often alchahol. UTM K ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 09:32:00 -0400 From: John Irvine Subject: Quadrozepplia Quadrophenia is a great film, but I must agree with Michael Godwin as to the shoddy period details. To his list I will add the prevelance of '70s model Vespas used, not to mention that Jimmy, rather than riding a "GS scooter with my hair cut neat", was on a Lambretta Li150 in the film. Speaking of which I really do need a cylinder for a Vespa Super Sport and the Zeppelin list has let me down so far, come on guys... Speaking of Robyn, was his K-records single a one off deal, or does he have plans to work with the label in the future? I thought those two songs were the best of the recent bunch. Also is there a decent FAQ which has so far eluded me? John Irvine My life's as good as a Zeppelin song, my life's as good as Stairway... - -Muriel's Hoof, er wedding. ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 9:52:53 -0400 From: LORDK@library.phila.gov Subject: More drugs So what will I advise my daughter? Unhinge thyself delibritly? I wonder how Robyn worked this out? Does he believe in judicious drug use, full out escapism, or abstinience. Based on nothing more than listenning to his music, I would guess he advocated the first choice, but has more actual experience of 2 and 3. Does anyone know how his daughter has handled this conundrum.? So--let me get this staight. A partisan of a list made up of Zep fans call s the Hitchcock list stupid. Now thats a good one. I must admitt that, not being a stoned student, there is much here I skim. Somedays I just delete my digest before reading--dont have the time or space in my mailbox. Sometimes Im in the mood and savor it. I like having abit of Susan and Quail and Ross and Bayard and Miles and flying Hedlades in my life. |I like the divirsity of this group, and that it makes room for me. Damm it all Jackson(by the way-do you play an instrument? Have you ever thought of joining a band?), of course we're eccentric and cant keep to the topic. We're fegs of a feather. Deal. Under the Mercy K ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 14:53:02 +0100 (BST) From: Michael R Godwin Subject: Re: 100% Hoo On Tue, 20 Oct 1998, dlang wrote: > However, Tommy could be bloody great onstage and I must admit the Who were a > wonderful live outfit, especially late 60's and early 70's. Best gig I saw , > Albert Hall, same day as the Stones in the park, we ran to the Albert hall > from Hyde park to catch the full set and the Who just blew us completely away. > One of the finest shows I've ever seen, especially after the rotten show the > Stones gave that day. I was there! I did almost the same thing - watched Alexis Korner's New Church, Pete Brown and Piblokto (or was it Battered Ornaments?) and King Crimson, but missed the Stones because I dashed straight along to the Albert Hall to catch Bodast (featuring Steve Howe), Chuck Berry and the Who. It's the only time I ever saw Pete do his famed guitar-trashing act - he smashed a fine-looking Gibson completely to bits... > However, the Chuck Berry fans in the audience ( Chuck shared the bill ) hated > the Who and they pelted Roger with pennies, such ingratitude !.... Rockers are very intolerant. You should have seen the way the Everly Bros crowd treated Loudon Wainwright at the same venue a couple of years later (they particularly didn't like that number where there was a list of various things "on the plane" - I mean, who needs it when you're wating to hear "Bird Dog" and "Let it be me"?) > Ah memories > dave . Who says drugs impair the memory? Now, where did I leave the car ... - - Mike G. ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 9:57:15 -0400 From: LORDK@library.phila.gov Subject: Drugs last word There is the occult idea that if you arouse the Kundili energy before you have the discipline and knowlege to use it(instead of having it use you)-you'll be a mess unless you can close down the chakras, which acholhol does--which is why, perhaps , you find old heads drinking in excess. Now Ill shut up K ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 09:59:53 -0400 From: lj lindhurst Subject: Re: This List Sucks! [RPI] 1.) who is this "roy harper" that you speak of? 2.) roger, will you marry me? (I'll give you slot #76, right after the fat guy from Blues Traveler and right before TGQ) 3.) Super Ultra Scientific Threadcoding Additions: TC= Tree Content (why does he want us to talk about trees though?) RPI= "Roger, Please Ignore" MI= Miserable Insipidities SS= "Stoned Student" GAWLOL= Led Zeppelin content 4.) Speaking of TGQ, I think Roger is about as real as "Helen Percival", if you know what I mean. (EVIL! EVIL!) back to gettin high and exacerbating, lj ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 98 9:51:37 EDT From: Ross Overbury Subject: Re: This List Sucks! > > God, I hate this list. ;) > Yeah, I've hated it for years. > > p.s. I finally picked up a copy of "Glass Flesh" - it rocks! Mark, you > sound so... so normal. Um. That didn't come out right, did it? Anyway, I > like it. Get the cassettes! Mark's other contribution is delightfully quirky. There are 50 songs that comprise this project and there's plenty of other worthies among them. My mom says you should also get GFII when it comes out. - -- that Balloon Man guy Montreal, Quebec, Canada email: rosso@cn.ca ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 10:22:16 -0400 From: Ethyl Ketone Subject: This Sucky List (1% RH, 0% Firesign Theater, RPI) I have to agree with "Roger." I've been on this list for several years and I've been meaning to comment on how much it sucks for a along time. Every time I meet up with Fegs for another Robyn show in SF, every off list e-mail I get, that chance meeting with Michael K. in Amoeba, the anticipated drinks and talk next week in NY with lj and TGQ, possible pints in various parts of the UK with UK Fegs, the infinate patience of the list for all my postings showing pedestrian knowledge of music and no knowledge of TV, those great tapes I got from new listee John in Japan (hope you got the soft boys tapes I sent John), the Santa Cruz fegfest I missed due to my glorious job, it all sucks. I definately have not joined a community of people united in interest of Robyn's unique music and a distinct sense of individual intellegence. I don't read every post, no matter how off topic. I can't stand Ebs' music criticisms and never hear of new bands from him and others. I hate the travelogues, the monologues and all those *lets be nice* postings from our own sharkboy. Actually, I've been meaning to unsubscribe for 3 years or so and I want to personally thank Roger here for showing me the light. But dammit all, I haven't been a stoned student since sometime back in the haze of the late 70s. Now those were good drugs... Yours, from somewhere in Vermont today, - - Carrie "Questions are a burden for others. Answers are a prison for oneself." **************************************************************************** M.E.Ketone/C.Galbraith meketone@ix.netcom.com ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 23:25:25 +0900 From: "John Boudreau" Subject: FW: Hoo " Wonderful " live outfit ? Your choice of adjective not exactly the one I would have chosen to describe the group that blew everyone ( including Abbie Hoffman ) off the stage at Woodstock , August 1969 . What a wall of sound that trio plus Daltrey could produce ! In their prime as good if not better than any other 3 piece power unit in the late 60's ( admittedly there were not that many around ) and that includes Cream and Jimi Hendrix Experience . I was fortunate enough to attend WOODSTOCK ( a high school friend and I hitched from Eastern Connecticut ) so can attest to the fact that The Who were an INCREDIBLE live band . Perhaps some of you fegs out there can supply an even more appropriate adjective . I am beat ; it is bedtime here in Sushiland and I must bid you all a goodnight . John " Music is your own experience , your thoughts , your wisdom . If you don't live it , it won't come out of your horn . { Charlie Parker } - -----Original Message----- 差出人 : dlang 宛先 : fegmaniax@smoe.org 日時 : 1998年10月20日 21:33 件名 : Re: Hoo >Eb sed >>I mean, Tommy is a damn wanky >>story, when you isolate it apart from the cool tunes.. >Hey , I agree with Eb for once !I sold Tommy years ago. > >However, Tommy could be bloody great onstage and I must admit the Who were a >wonderful live outfit, especially late 60's and early 70's. Best gig I saw , >Albert Hall, same day as the Stones in the park, we ran to the Albert hall >from Hyde park to catch the full set and the Who just blew us completely away. >One of the finest shows I've ever seen, especially after the rotten show the >Stones gave that day. >However , the Chuck Berry fans in the audience ( Chuck shared the bill ) hated >the Who and they pelted Roger with pennies, such ingratitude !.... > > Ah memories >dave . > ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 10:31:45 -0400 From: Stephen Buckalew Subject: Re: This list sucks In response to Robert Jackson's: >It's barely tolerable from Hitchcock himself at this >point in his career, let alone a bunch of stoned students. Miles Goosens wrote: >>Yeah, man, it's like an internet mail list -- but on acid! When i arrived at my soul-crushing corporate job this morning, and read this response, I almost fell off my chair... Maybe R.J. is suffering from information overload... 'tis the peril of the internet. I like off-thread topics, I get exposed to some good new music here. Not all the music discussed on the list is my cup of tea, but in my little town, we have alterna-rock radio, classic rock cover bands, and most of my fellow acoustic coffee house musician friends in town are into FOLK music, you know: Q: How do you tell one Irish fiddle tune from another? A: The title... Yawn....Also, I feel good knowing that there are at least a few folks in the world who when I say "Robyn Hitchcock", don't reply "Huh?". Who knows...maybe I'll get to meet some of you eventually... S.B. (...still wracked with guilt over missing Quails Pennsylvania bash---"I had a gig that day....honest!") S.B. ***************************************************************************** "...everythings all on...it's rosy...it's a beautiful day!"--Syd Barrett **************************************************************************** * ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 10:50:46 -0700 From: Mike Runion Subject: When I Was Dead Hey all, My deadhead pal Troy called me up last night to tell me a joke. He personalized it for me. In light of Roger's "incendiary" remarks that have stirred up some wickedly funny and heartwrenching posts this morning, I figured I could hop in and muddy the water some... It goes something like this: So Robyn Hitchcock dies. He arrives in heaven and is rather pleased. He gets a sweet little house all to himself, and God has even furnished the rather spare living room with a big framed Soft Boys poster. There's a guitar or two lying about in the pristene white rooms. Sorta heavenly, you know. So, Robyn is strolling around his new digs and looks out the window. Up on the hill he spies a huge fabulous mansion. All this trippy Grateful Dead music is pumping out of the place, old Jerry Garcia guitars are strewn all over the front porch, tie-dye tapestries hang in every window, those nasty little acid bears are taped up everywhere. The place sits in an everpresent haze of sweet-smelling incense, and throngs of hippies in Dead t-shirts and clamoring over the gates to get in. Robyn is puzzled and calls out to God. "Now, I'm certainly happy with this little home I've got, but I'm just wondering, why does Jerry Garcia deserve so much more?" God smirks and replies "That's not Jerry's house, that's mine!" Yes, I grunted when I heard this one too. - -- Mike Runion Cocoa, FL, USA /******************************************************************\ | VCM: http://www5.palmnet.net/~mrrunion/cones.htm | | Fegmaps: http://www5.palmnet.net/~mrrunion/fegmaps | | Spoken Word Tape: http://www5.palmnet.net/~mrrunion/wordtape.htm | \******************************************************************/ "Wait a minute. Time for a Planetary Sit-In!" - Julian Cope ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 98 10:40:22 EDT From: Ross Overbury Subject: Re: This List Sucks! > > > On Tue, 20 Oct 1998, Terrence M Marks wrote: > > > what's a Roger Jackson? > > > > It's a kind of small cylindrical wrench. > > I thought it was a revolutionary movement opposed to the expansionist > imperial policies of Jacksonian America. > > Isn't it a breed related to Scottie dogs? - -- Ross Overbury Montreal, Quebec, Canada email: rosso@cn.ca ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 1998 11:08:41 -0400 (EDT) From: Gary Assassin Subject: Re: This Sucky List (1% RH, 0% Firesign Theater, RPI) Funny how these two words are being used here. Suck and List. I am stting here musing how much I love those two words together. BAck in 1982, I created my own SuckList, which now has over 300 entries. Maybe you all want to go and check it out http://www.panix.com/~gsa/slist.html WARNING: Quite offensive. ------------------------------------ If you have a condom and sunscreen SPF 15 or greater, than it's safe to look at http://www.panix.com/~gsa/index.html On Tue, 20 Oct 1998, Ethyl Ketone wrote: > I have to agree with "Roger." I've been on this list for several years and > I've been meaning to comment on how much it sucks for a along time. Every > time I meet up with Fegs for another Robyn show in SF, every off list > e-mail I get, that chance meeting with Michael K. in Amoeba, the > anticipated drinks and talk next week in NY with lj and TGQ, possible pints > in various parts of the UK with UK Fegs, the infinate patience of the list > for all my postings showing pedestrian knowledge of music and no knowledge > of TV, those great tapes I got from new listee John in Japan (hope you got > the soft boys tapes I sent John), the Santa Cruz fegfest I missed due to my > glorious job, it all sucks. I definately have not joined a community of > people united in interest of Robyn's unique music and a distinct sense of > individual intellegence. I don't read every post, no matter how off topic. > I can't stand Ebs' music criticisms and never hear of new bands from him > and others. I hate the travelogues, the monologues and all those *lets be > nice* postings from our own sharkboy. > > Actually, I've been meaning to unsubscribe for 3 years or so and I want to > personally thank Roger here for showing me the light. > > But dammit all, I haven't been a stoned student since sometime back in the > haze of the late 70s. Now those were good drugs... > > Yours, from somewhere in Vermont today, > - Carrie > > "Questions are a burden for others. Answers are a prison for oneself." > **************************************************************************** > M.E.Ketone/C.Galbraith > meketone@ix.netcom.com > > ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 20 Oct 98 11:25:48 -0500 From: The Great Quail Subject: Re: This List Sucks! (Q, RPI, MI, SS, GAWLOL) "This List Sucks!" typed Roger Jackson (aka "Dennis DeYoung" aka "Rick Wakeman" aka "That Guy from Argent" but generally known amongst the Inner Circle of the Plumbic Dirigibles as Graf von der Twinkie) as he settled back into his seat, wiping the sweat from his brow. He looked up nervously at the Shadow looming over his wall. He was in too deep, there was no doubt about that. The Shadow hissed, its voice sounding like some cheesy special effect from "The Dungeon Master," starring Bull from Night Court: "Yessss. . . . did you post it?" Graf Twinkie trembled, blinking rapidly as sweat rolled into his eyes. "Yes, Overlord." His heart dipped into his chest and he held back his tears. Why? Why must it come to this? Why was he chosen as an Agent of the Overlords? Was there indeed no quarter? Why was he named after a small cylindrical wrench? The Shadow quivered on the wall, and a sound like fifty wooden beavers being gnawed by capuchin monkeys filled the room. This was, of course, a chuckle. "Good, my little servant. Do you feel . . . better?" Repressing a shudder at what "better" must mean to this Thing, Graf Twinkie nodded dully. "But I have . . . reservations, my Overlord. I don't think that every List on the Net should be just like the Led Z--" A piercing howl rang through the room like the opening chords to a Power Ballad from Hell. "SILENCE, servant! Did we not provide you with TAPES? Do we not get things TREED on time? Did we not give you a new Life as a member of the Inner Circle? You dare doubt us now?" The Graf looked at his tape collection. So much. But also, so much he had to give up . . . all his Renaldo and the Loaf LPs. His entire collection of "Y Tori Kant Read" bootlegs. Even his favorite disc of all time, the gold CD pressing of Jefferson Airplane's "Surrealistic Insipidities." But there was no turning back now. . . . "I am sorry my Overlord." The Shadow reeled on the wall, spilling ultraviolet light across the row of black velvet Frank Frazetta posters. "Good. Remember we can still discipline you! You wouldn't want me to summon The Thing That Plays A Theramin for Twenty Minutes? Or The Worm That Walks Like a Drunk But Can't Remember Laughter?" "N-no. . . .that won't be necessary." Tears stung his eyes. Oh, what he was forced to do to his beloved Feg List! But the Overlords -- their plans -- The Shadow twirled menacingly and vanished to the darkest depths of Mordor, leaving a smell of brimstone, patchouli, and cannabis drifting across the room. The Graf slumped into his chair, shaking. My God, that was close. The last time he showed reluctance, an Overlord had to summon The Bob Plant Wereharper . . . terrible! It just . . . it just . . . wouldn't stop . . . playing harmonica --! -- a-and the golden hair. . . . unspeakable! But still, rumours abounded about even worse creatures at Their disposal. He prayed to all the gods that he would never meet The Thing that Did the Animations for The Song Remains the Same! Oh, the horror! And Rush fans only had to deal with By-Tor and the Snow Dog! Best not think on that. It wasn't all bad, of course, this new life. After all, his initiation did bring him many revelations. That the mysteriously titled "Four Sticks" was played with four drumsticks; what "ZoSo" and "Economium" really mean; that Sandy Denny was a woman; even the current location of John Paul Jones. (Who would have ever thought that Denise Sharpe was right?) The Graf's computer bleeped as a new posting appeared on the Feg List. The Great Quail, his favorite Feg. He opened the message: "Hey Fellow Fegs! Man, I must be getting old. Last night, after I finished my homework, I lit up a reefer and watched Frank Zappa's '200 Motels', one of the coolest movies *ever.* I suddenly realized how much time had passed since I last saw Zappa live. Did I ever tell you about how I stole his cigarette butt and kept it in my car? What a great story. I kept it in my ashtray, and I told people that it was Zappa's -- so natuarlly they just assumed that Zappa was smoking in my car with me! Now if only I would have gotten a urninal cake. . . ." The Graf chuckled at the Quail's zany antics. Hopefully Dave Lang or Mark Gloster would post soon -- that was always fun! A sound -- !!! Sigh. It was only his wife, downstairs. Suddenly racked with a mixture of guilt and paranoia, the Graf quickly closed the Fegs List and checked his Roy Harper List. Nope, nothing today. . . . Golly, what was this, six straight weeks of nothing . . . ? He was suddenly snapped out of his reverie by his wife calling him down to dinner. He shut down his computer and felt his rumbling tummy. "I'm coming, Helen!" +---------+---------+---------+---------+---------+---------+---------+ The Great Quail, K.S.C. (riverrun Discordian Society) For fun with postmodern literature, New York vampires, and Fegmania, visit Sarnath: http://www.rpg.net/quail "The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents." -- H.P. Lovecraft ------------------------------ End of fegmaniax-digest V7 #395 *******************************