From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V4 #15 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Friday, January 26 2001 Volume 04 : Number 015 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: Ice [RJonthego@aol.com] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Thu, 25 Jan 2001 01:26:38 EST From: RJonthego@aol.com Subject: ET: Ice Comments needed, begged for, lusted after and greatly appreciated. Ice by Roya Sorooshian 1/24/01 It was cold. Very cold. Perle could only feel her nose if she scrunched it up. She couldn't even feel Ben's hand holding hers until he squeezed it. She swallowed. Every flower she saw was curling up into itself. She was cold enough to do that too. But Ben wouldn't let her stop. He pulled her forward, although the cold was getting to him too. Wrapping like a blanket around his heart. But he'd heart stories of what happens if you fell asleep when you're too cold. He couldn't let anything else happen to Perle. It was his fault they were here, lost in the hills instead of somewhere warm. They'd been having a somewhat chilly picnic on the beach when he'd turned around and seen the hills behind them, the houses like jewels, glowing on that gray day. He had pulled Perle to her feet, and laughing, they ran. But now, it was different. Before, Perle had been smiling. Her milky skin had pink tints instead of this blue pallor that was shining through now. His need to protect her grew. She was more precious than her namesake. He always had the urge to stand in front of her, to shield her. From treasure hunters, from the dark ocean, or even from her own cold shell. She always seemed to be on the other side of a wall. A wall made of something shiny, and cold. Something that he could see her through, but could never quite get past. Like a wall of ice. Earlier that day was the closest to melting the barrier he had ever come. Before things had been sunny, everything he said had been greeted with a smile. Before it had been an adventure. Now it was frightening. It was almost bewitched. There was no one out. No cars driving by, no dogs barking from the other side of chain link fences, no dark eyed children running or playing. And now a cold film had fallen over both of them. Perle didn't put up this shield. This cold was something neither of them could control. Ben could feel his desperation mounting. Along with that he felt a twinge of frustration. She would never trust him now. So he pushed on, the cold making it difficult to speak. They were lower in the hills now, passing gravel lots and thrift stores, which would have looked intriguing during the day, but were now the lair of who-knows-whats. The thought of all those discarded items that were once loved, made Perle think of dark windows and loneliness. Up ahead they could see the sidewalk turn to red, and to purple, from a neon sign shining above. They could hear the sound of voices, and laughter, that buzzed in and out like the sign that read Cobra's Nest. Perle swallowed again, and in they walked. Ben winced at the strong smells that hit him in the face. Perle opened her eyes wide at the color. She felt better in here, the smoke was like a curtain and she didn't feel so naked. Or so cold. There were bodies everywhere. Some standing by the bar on the opposite wall, glowing like strange aliens under the lamps with red and green shades. There were people perched all over a few couches in one corner. Clothing seemed to be optional. For the first time in her life Perle could imagine being warm enough to shed her protective layers. In the middle of the room there were people undulating wildly to what seemed to Perle to be the sweetest music she'd ever heard. Her heart grew and swelled with each pulsing second. She let go of Ben's hand, and watched open mouthed. Her head was swirling with the throbbing colors, and she wanted nothing more than to be in the middle of that floor, dancing away her skin. She looked down at her arms. They looked weak and pale compared to everyone else. She felt small again. Alone inside of her body. She turned to Ben. He took her hand and led her through the room where they found two stools by the bar. From there they could see a doorway with a beaded curtain. They could hear more laughter and fierce sounds, like animals with bared claws, emitting from the hidden room. Perle was afraid again. A snaky woman, a tall and sinewy woman, with gold bands around her arms slithered up beside Ben. She noticed his interest in the doorway and smiled at him, showing all of her teeth. They were sharp and pointed. Perle could almost see a forked tongue. "Come with me" she hissed, taking both of them by their arms. Perle's eyes watered as SnakeWoman's nails dug into her flesh. She led them through a doorway, the beads letting them inside with the slightest of tinkling, like ice cubes in a glass. She led them into a room with mirrors covered the walls, the ceiling and the floor. Perle felt like she had, long ago, at a County Fair's funhouse. Her pale reflection jumped out at her from everywhere. Perle thought her bones were icicles and might splinter and stab her any second. She clung to Ben, but he didn't squeeze her hand reassuringly like he had before. The muscles stood out on his forearm, and his reflection was a stranger. SnakeWoman's grip on Ben's arm was firm, and warm. The tension in the back of his neck slowly dissolved. The light from the mirrors bounced off of SnakeWoman's gold bracelets and arm bands, and made him think of molten lava and fire, and warm bodies. He was tired of being so cold. Tired of the pit of ice that had formed in his stomach. Tired of Perle's freezing hands, and frightened eyes. The heat from SnakeWoman's body surrounded him and penetrated his body to the core. SnakeWoman led them over to where there were 6 or 7 people with wide, glassy eyes bent over a mirror. Ben dropped Perle's hand, and dropped to his knees beside SnakeWoman. His nostrils flared as he inhaled her powdered venom. Perle swallowed a scream as he turned past her, and to the SnakeWoman. A thousand invisible threads strangled her as she turned and ran from the room. Ben, hypnotized by green and gold glinting eyes, didn't even see Perle leave. Perle ran, gasping, and didn't even realize when someone pressed a glass in her hand. Her throat still felt like she was being strangled, so she drank it, and immediately some of the invisible cords that had been holding her were severed. As she walked to the bar, the colors seemed to brighten. That music was back, instead of the screeching, whining noise that had filled her ears since SnakeWoman had appeared. She drank another and laughed as SnakeWoman chased her rattle around in circles, only to wither up and leave nothing but a skin, which also shriveled and faded away. She drank another when she thought of Ben, which gave her courage. She dropped the cup and pushed her way to the dancing. She stood, swaying in the middle of the pulsating crowd. She was pushed, and pulled, one way then another. She closed her eyes when the colors were too bright, but she could still see them, as if they were painted on the inside of her eyelids. There was nothing to do but dance, and so she danced. Her body wasn't her own anymore, which was just the way she wanted it. She had always hated being Perle. Pearl, pale, small and cold. And so she danced. Ben woke, crying. He had dreamt of Perle, that she was a mirror, and when he reached out to touch her, she shattered, turning to white, white dust. He staggered past the still forms on the cold floor and out where the music pounded in his ears and every face leered at him. He stumbled over a discarded glass, and when he looked up again he could see her. She was spinning and spinning like a madwoman. As he watched she went faster, and faster, the music changed to something desperate. Like fear and rage. She twirled and twirled, around and around... She could see the tops of everyone's heads now. Her feet had left the ground, and still she twirled. Higher and higher. The air was turning the brightest white she had ever seen. Brighter than snow, than ice, than anything. She got cold all of a sudden, and could feel her eyelashes as they beat wildly against her cheeks. She could see a glass ceiling just above her, and at the last crystal moment, she crashed through, still spinning. She took a breath of fresh air and felt her lungs shatter like the ceiling. The sky was white but she could close her eyes now. And so, still spinning, she did. Ben watched as Perle spun around and around, faster and faster and faster. The crowds were pressed against him and wouldn't let him move, even as the music reached feverpitch. Faster and faster... then for one split second, time stopped. Perle's eyes opened and met his, and he felt her cool breath on his cheek like he'd felt so many times before. He felt an invisible hand squeeze his. Then time continued, louder and more glaring than it had been before. He watched as Perle crumpled to the floor. He watched as the screeching white ambulance took away her body. And he watched as the last few people disappeared off into the night, which was now colder than it had ever been before. ~~~ ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V4 #15 *********************************