From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V4 #12 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Tuesday, January 23 2001 Volume 04 : Number 012 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: latest batch from roya [RJonthego@aol.com] ET: a little more rambles [Katherine Alexandra Subject: ET: a little more rambles hi, hi i don't like dance around much at all, but i have always been honest with eda's. sounds weird. but i read once to never delete or erase anything, to just play with it from where it gets lost. i am not writing for perfection but merely for my own better understanding of myself, and through this list, perhaps a better understanding of someone else. in other words, i would like to delete it but i have promised myself never to delete anything on this list, because at that moment it felt right. DANCE AROUND dance around in your blue velvet show all the pretty boys your cute little skirt dance around like a princess show all the cute girls your new shirt dance around in all those little games be a red head of flame kiss him passionatly then her promise tomorrow dance around in your own games (forget who you are) THE TRUTH BEHIND MY LOVE ladies and gentlemen of the court i have something to confess. it has been 5 years since i have seen my love, yet i am still fasinted by his every touch. he no longer exists in my reality, yet only in my mind. i rip him to shreds to become the man i desire of, only to meet each new one with extreme tastes of dissapointment. i want him in my blood. he no longer remembers me, the then 16 year old blonde. yet i have taken all of his innocence along with me, believing that no other holds the power that he does. he is clueless in this game that i have learned to play. he has no idea of how i do desire. let me blush while i tell the new one how i do love him. let me punish myself while i allow himself in me. let me giggle to me own delight when i realize how mad i have become. no longer in love with him, but only the fiction that i have happily written over the years of sorrow and misery. Yahoo! Auctions - Buy the things you want at great prices. http://auctions.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 21 Jan 2001 22:12:22 -0800 (PST) From: Katherine Alexandra Subject: ET: a frustration ramble (i do apologize for so many posts) they said that i was hyperactive. for laughing a little too loud. they were convinced that i had ADD, i always seem to get distracted. they diagnosed me over dinner of dysfunction in my life. of not being right for their son, who has no problems. they wonder why i talk so fast, there must be something wrong. they question why my eyes dart, i must be hiding something. they tell him, i imagine over a breakfest table, yet in reality through the electronic age..but they tell him how i am not right, for i laugh too loud, and there was never a picket fence around my house. i shake when i find out. i feel sick. somehow along the lines of deeper understanding through their psychology (both parents of their degree) they have forgotten the mere need to force conformity off of our bodies and become who we are. they have forgotten that not everybody sits polietly in their seat, and if that were, we would never get anywhere in this world. Yahoo! Auctions - Buy the things you want at great prices. http://auctions.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 22 Jan 2001 09:01:33 EST From: HMN333@aol.com Subject: ET: too late hi all, this is my first time posting in a long time. all comments/criticisms welcome privately :-) i guess you could say this is more of a rambling rather than a poem. Heather HMN333@aol.com too late it's been three years since i first saw you i was only seventeen you seemed ancient at twenty three it was a set up and a let down i suppose but still for two years i thought of nothing but you when we met again last year there was something in the air i guess you could say you saved me from myself.. and an abusive boy you showed me what it was to be loved and i walked away from you again i think nothing but you i have struggled with my regret for some six long months tearing and eating at me well i thought i had worked up some nerve i asked a friend about you last night but before i could say all those things, the things i wanted to say to you that i wanted you to hear and to hold me and to say you had been thinking them too, she said "oh him? he's 'in love'" never before have I felt my heart break like it did last night as i heard all about her how cute, her name is heather too oh, and she's "so sweet" you say? i'm glad for you.. all too perfect.. does this mean i should move on? should i ignore this aching and burning inside of me and go my own way? am i stuck with this regret forever? do you think of me ever? is there still a chance? or am i too late? ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 22 Jan 2001 21:03:35 EST From: HMN333@aol.com Subject: ET: too late II too late II the initial shock has passed maybe my mom was right there was a reason why I left you and not the other way around maybe it's just the thought of another girl in your arms those arms that saved me that almost brought me peace there's a million maybe's maybe this is a sign that i should wish you luck and go on my merry way i doubt our paths will cross again maybe......... maybe i love you even though i never told you maybe i'll meet the man of my dreams tomorrow and never think about you again maybe i'll just miss you for a little while maybe........ ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V4 #12 *********************************