From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest)
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Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V4 #3
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eda-thoughts-digest     Thursday, January 11 2001     Volume 04 : Number 003




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                               Today's Subjects:
                               -----------------
  ET: "I'm leaving on a jet plane..."                     [RJonthego@aol.com]

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Wed, 10 Jan 2001 17:32:12 EST
From: RJonthego@aol.com
Subject: ET: "I'm leaving on a jet plane..." 

guitar playing behind me
remembering
the music and the shouting,
the laughter.
there was always somebody with
wings and a halo
or devil horns
or a tiara
we traded voices and the piano
like we traded
cuddles
and
you have no idea how alone
i feel right now.

*

there is more i need to talk about
than just how alone i am
more to say than 
i miss you.
not even 12 hours and i am
online wishing you were
at your computer.

i'm afraid to write anything
i don't want to make it a memory
i want to be
surrounded by arms
and bracelets and wings
and sleeping bags and movies
i want to be singing karaoke
or spouting into song in the car
like a music video
watching the freeway around us
not worrying that
you are leaving soon
and i am leaving tonight
and he is leaving tomorrow
and soon the house will be empty,
the couch cushions back in the right place
the floor swept
the videos returned.

i need to find
one thing to write about
this jumble of bodies in my mind
is confusing my fingers.
my throat is so sore,
i can't sing our songs
but maybe they should stay a part of yesterday.
flying above our heads, a reminder that
we are leaving
on a jet plane...

*

you have 
the brightest eyes.
brighter than the flourescent of the
train station, even
but not brighter than
the moon outside the window.
and i won't tell you my wish
but i think our wishes were made stronger
because we were making them together.

*
flowers in our hair
like garlands, i should wear this happiness
as a necklace
or wrapped around my heart
until it sank in
and was a permanent attachment
etched in my skin
but with no blood.
because i close my eyes for the gory parts
and i insist on happy endings.
not staring alone, out a train window.
but picking flowers
for your hair
entangling us all in this 
daisy chain of arms.

*
roya

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End of eda-thoughts-digest V4 #3
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