From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #394 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Sunday, December 3 2000 Volume 03 : Number 394 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: around and around we go.. [DrkShadws85@aol.com] ET: hi all -- i'm new to this [PlacidPhantom@aol.com] ET: Greetings [PlacidPhantom@aol.com] ET: take a look at me now [DrkShadws85@aol.com] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Sat, 2 Dec 2000 09:14:03 EST From: DrkShadws85@aol.com Subject: ET: around and around we go.. You know when like all you feel like is shit? Well yah its come to that again, Im all hollowed out. I almost prefer it that way, but it just hurts to much. And I know that I sent my crapolla poetry here and whatever i feel like sayin I send. But I guess I just dont care anymore. Im at the point of wanting to give up. I get letters from my best friends from Arizona and it doesnt make me happy that they even remember me, I just sit there teary eyed looking at the letter. I cant even bring myself to read them right away. Its like I wait a week or something, and theres something wrong with that to me. And like now Im sitting here venting about the little pathetic, lonely self to a bunch of people that I dont really even know. Considering Ive only talked to like 2 or 3 of you. So yah I dunno, Im a dumbfuck just looking to vent *sigh* Im sorry for sending this to the list, my apologies go out to all of you..yah heres a poem.. - -sam - --Down-- I want you to come here and hold my hand all my darkness is making me weaker in the heart that Ive ever been and I dont love anybody as more than friends Windshield wipers are going a million miles a minute its only raining my tears theyre suppose to be here to stay thats why wipers arent working Leave me alone tomorrow because I have to sew myself back together again walk down the same bloody red brick road that never led me anywhere ::::im too depressed to go on youll be sorry when im gone:::: --blink 182-- ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 2 Dec 2000 09:32:23 EST From: PlacidPhantom@aol.com Subject: ET: hi all -- i'm new to this this is actually my first post/mail that i've sent to this group. i'm guessing i sent it to the correct address? anyhow, i have a few thoughts that i could share with everyone. would someone let me know if this worked so i could start sending? thanks! Jas ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 2 Dec 2000 13:03:50 EST From: PlacidPhantom@aol.com Subject: ET: Greetings okay, well with my now knowing how to do this, I suppose I should tell you all a bit about myself. I'm 24 and live in Mississippi with my lovely wife, who is 19. I've been writing only for about two years now. I wrote my first few poems mostly because I was inspired by Jewel's beautiful words: her lyrics and poetry. the others came from my longing to understand the burst of emotion. I suppose I just didn't know what I could feel inside until it was presented to me right before my eyes. you see, I never got the chance to express when growing up. I never knew you could, for that matter. so basically I didn't listen to what was going on inside of me. my heart was sleeping, and my mind was weeping over all my loneliness. it's so odd to say, but I have recently felt that I am just beginning to live as a person -- as a living, breathing, experiencing entity. almost as though I was just only born and I am gasping at the beauty and reality in things. you can say I was inspired to be a human. I was swiped away from my own inner civilization that I had made for myself, and brought into a whole new realm of thought, sight, and hunger. now I long for things I didn't know even existed before. and, with all that being said, I suppose I can begin to introduce my thoughts. Thanks for your time! ~~~ Untitled it's morning outside the black seeps into my ears with it's soupy resonance telling me it's time another day filled with the endless faces I'll never remember and the humbling tasks I'll never outgrow the day brings value in shadows and I sit still while moving about my mind a blur a whirlwind of sleepy meaning trapped inside by the light looking out an empty shapeless window that my longing has created in the four walls that make up my world until it is day until time yawns itself to sleep and I rise again and I breathe my first awaited breath finally beginning to exist ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 2 Dec 2000 22:21:21 EST From: DrkShadws85@aol.com Subject: ET: take a look at me now This is to a particular someone on the list to explain the best way that I told them what was going on in this head of mine. This is the way Im thinking, and I cant get this out of my head. You know, I mean everything in this poem, and everything that I say; I just dont always understand. Ya know? But thanks fer putting up with me and talking to me and making me smile. Smiles and laughter are some of the best gifts that I have ever recieved. And yah so I know that you read this, write back, ok? (you know who u are *winks*) Yah so sorry to everyone else who is reading this and really has no clue what I am talking about. Just my babble to someone who I consider my awesomely awesome special buddy, whom is just great! Thanks to that person..aww *hugs to you* ahh ok, sorry! im getting carried away with myself here. Ya'll take care. - -Samantha ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ **Untitled** Waiting at the window for the girl inside the mirror my head is hanging heavy I just wish it would explode to you I could never tell how sorry I am but I cant keep it in anymore but here I stand still silent Now Im coming home crying the unstopable tears keeping it a secret that Im dieing from every angle from within nothing phases me anymore not even the stranger that brushed my skin while he walked by I think I know where hes been before do you remember me? I knew you ten million years before either of us were born Stop the voices that are telling me right from wrong I will be the one to tell you I wont turn my back on you the way you did to me Youre my friend but Im scared to tell you I love you even if its only in a friendly way more disasters happen than you know Im standing to close to the edge ...you dont know what Ive done here Please embrace my thought I hope its my last while the moonlight shines down on my pale white face (the same one I cant stand looking at in the mirror) ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V3 #394 **********************************