From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #209 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Thursday, May 25 2000 Volume 03 : Number 209 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: fragments [Naomi ] ET: poem ["Claudia" ] ET: quick question [mandabear4@juno.com] ET: Psyche's Rapture [Annie ] ET: Daughter of the Damned [Annie ] ET: little thoughts from me. [Katherine Alexandra ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 09:01:26 -0700 (PDT) From: Naomi Subject: ET: fragments you say, I love the way your fingers fall from my mouth when I let go of everything that kept you around but why then do you stay? *because I know NO other way.* - -- you were there. you saw it... f all to piec es. how did that feel? when did you notice the change? ... did you? - -- call me silly, but I think you should let go of that which you do not see. so why care about my tears? no, I suppose you would n't. - -- he asked my na m e. ---------> he asked my wi s h e s. --------> he never said a th not i ... n ... g. -------> ... one ... ... ... word. - -- (inspired by a book and a movie) in a world without color would roses still be beautiful stars still twinkle in our eyes? in a world with walls and boundries would we still dream of mountains and skylines and valleys and oceans? in a world without hope would we still smile each day knowing ahead what was to come? in this world as we know it full of color, without limits, and brimming with hope... will we never see the beauty? ===== "What is Desire? Desire is... complicated. One person always wants the other person more." -VS __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Send instant messages & get email alerts with Yahoo! Messenger. http://im.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 20:45:03 +0200 From: "Claudia" Subject: ET: poem I'll say a little prayer_tonight_ waiting for the morning light to answer it. The darkness of this room is a sweet company because i know the break of dawn will give me that breath again. All curled up in this sweet wait i listen to a lullaby that never leaves me. Just a few more hours and you will rescue me again Just a few more breaths and you will bring me back to life. Loneliness is such a nice word when i know your voice is going to chase it away. A joyful spirit dances in my eyes when my soul feels that moment is near. The stars in the sky become messangers of Love and the glorious morning shows its grace singing that my love is holding me in its embrace. ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 14:46:28 -0300 From: mandabear4@juno.com Subject: ET: quick question has anyone out there read the book "lord of the flies?" I'm reading it now and i like it alot...many others whoo are also reading it don't seem to like it...they are reading it for plot (which sucks) but the book is about character development...which i like....any one out there have an opinion? ~Mandabear~ "The Forever Seeking Teen Angel" ^j^ ^j^ ________________________________________________________________ YOU'RE PAYING TOO MUCH FOR THE INTERNET! Juno now offers FREE Internet Access! Try it today - there's no risk! For your FREE software, visit: http://dl.www.juno.com/get/tagj. ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 19:42:34 -0400 From: Annie Subject: ET: Psyche's Rapture I used to think of ways I could get back, back, back to you. I thought I might drown myself in the sea, that primordial stew. I imagined myself, a willing piece of flesh prey, twirling about in the blinding and unendurable white gauze of spider silk. The masses would coming, long-legged and starving for a God--but finding only sharp-edged rosaries and my fragile corpse. I hoped, I prayed that Lucifer would come for me-O, surely he must be my simple, sinful Prince! The Prince of Twilight-and yet, the sun never set in my vision. So, what can a girl do? Now that you are gone, crippled trees are growing in my desert, and I do not sleep on a bed of bones. And I am beginning to believe that God was sleeping when he dreamt me up--am I nightmare or am I fantasy? Can He fantasize about sinners? Well, we are here somehow, and the devil does not make us out of brittle sage. The great blasphemy, the soulless cacaphony. And all the rapture of Cain and Abel, of sinning beyond recognition and desperation. And now I have arrived, like a night when the moon is just a fang hanging in the air. I am here, like the phoenix and fire in Lucifer's hair. ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 19:58:26 -0400 From: Annie Subject: ET: Daughter of the Damned Comparable to the lone predator, but not as conquerable; I eye you with the uncertainty usually reserved for the tearing of flesh. More matter-of-fact than timid, anything but scared, and slightly pained. I have scarred often and healed in a glance. Like the cat I have nine times to die. This is just my third. I died twice before. Once on that day, the day of rapture and fire. The day that was swallowed up into night as easily as a stone, getting choked up like a splinter. How can one thing be so loosely transformed? I clung to the last ray as though it were my fleeting breath; which it may well have been. And the cold lamp that penetrated my shade soon ate its way through to me like an acid rain. Soon, soon, all I could see was the ice! I fell in love with it, ran my fingers over the marble face, the void eyes, the lipped abyss. This was my second death. And they pulled me out, kicking and screaming. I was a mad girl then, an angel with my plumage of flesh worms-they peeled them off like sticky pearls. I swallowed blackberries with the adoration of conditioned behavior. Just like this, like this, and it is only what you have that you can miss. I am a queen in my own right. A queen and a scuplture, hand-painted and thought-tainted. Made like marble, preserved forever and willing to die again for that peanut-crunching crowd. ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 17:06:06 -0700 (PDT) From: Katherine Alexandra Subject: ET: little thoughts from me. waiting in the heat of passion i lost who i am. underneath the black shirt, the mermaid skirt, the fish net stockings. i hid behind my dyed red hair, a flame. in hopes that he wouldnt notice the brown in me. i closed my eyes tightly. perhaps the best of life's lessons are learned at the worse of times. and now i see how things were...better. they were the quiet days. when i found happiness through double kegger parties and holding my nephew tightly. before i yearned for change. and here it is, with a broken rubber on the floor. with fear inside of my bones and anger in his. i never want it, i never want it, i never want it again. i asked for too much. now a 72 hour pill ripping apart in me, estrogen to the depths of my soul, unable to see clearly, only wanting to cling onto my mother. who is gone . wanting to cling to the past. which is gone . wanting the essence of my virginity, when i was 16 years of age. which is all gone. no regrets in the morning light. no i'm sorrys under my breath. how i got from there to here.... we spend most of our time complaining about what is ours, what we wish was their's, what we no longer want. and here i am unable to say who i am anymore. i left at 9 o'clock at night with my tiny car packed with little brown boxes. i left my reality in the moonlight and felt on tear, then slapped my wrist, and felt nothing at all. i see myself here from the steamed bathroom window and i no longer wonder how this happened. it was from my complaining at 15, it was from my doing at 17 it was from my wanting at 19, that has landed me in the arms of...my own. it was this and it was that, that has stripped me away of my mothers cooking and my fathers dreams. it has been my kicking and screaming, my silent pleading, my wishing, my application filling, that day i sat down and said to them it was time for me to leave. . __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Kick off your party with Yahoo! Invites. http://invites.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 17:11:50 -0700 (PDT) From: Katherine Alexandra Subject: ET: confession of an over protective brother. fear. CONFESSIONS OF AN OVER PROTECTIVE BROTHER. he said that i am i just like her. as if it were some sort of insult. he told me that my smile is similar, that our eyes match, our movements are identical. she has my genetic code. of course my nose looks like hers. i feel like telling him of the DNA, of the blood which runs through my veins, that is her blood, and daddys blood. but he keeps ranting. of how she dresses in my clothing, how she walks the way i do, how she blushes when she lies, how her voice sent shivers down his spine, because he thought that i was in the room. but she is my sister, i want to say. we are bound to be similar. but he goes on. 9 years without her...how could i be just like her? from different mothers! we have different brothers! yet we are the same. how could this witch of a person, how could this female that has minipulated him with her sway, be just like his little sister? how could this beauty that has scared him, this child of the demon, this impossible human...hold all the same characteristics as his sweet little sister that has never hurt a fly? yet all i hear is the fear in his voice. the fear that i know what he did. the fear that he will do it again because my nose matches her's and we both are trouble. __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Kick off your party with Yahoo! Invites. http://invites.yahoo.com/ ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 24 May 2000 22:50:28 -0400 From: shivergirl Subject: ET: icky insects of any kind ;) mandabear4@juno.com wrote: > has anyone out there read the book "lord of the flies?" unfortunately yes, and i just helped my cousin in high school out with some questions for it last month, so it's kinda more fresh. > I'm reading it > now and i like it alot...many others whoo are also reading it don't seem > to like it...they are reading it for plot (which sucks) actually, i think the plot is pretty okay, the pacing and such. but the actual writing was a chore to read, and the whole subject matter distasteful, prolly because it hits too close to home. > but the book is > about character development...which i like....any one out there have an > opinion? guess it depends which character you're talking about.i forget the main protagonist..it's not ralph, is it? or is he one of the ones who's killed? all i remember is there was far too much symbolism in every godamn thing from the glasses to the conch to the pig, and the movie was worse. tarA. > ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V3 #209 **********************************