From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #151 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Friday, April 21 2000 Volume 03 : Number 151 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: Re: haha [RedWoodenBeads@aol.com] ET: Re: haha! this is too funny! [RedWoodenBeads@aol.com] ET: Re: i love animals [RedWoodenBeads@aol.com] ET: Re: population [RedWoodenBeads@aol.com] ET: geez [RedWoodenBeads@aol.com] ET: i think we're all sick of this [kara garbe ] ET: Re: geez ["Kevin B. Pease" ] Re: ET: Joe, this for you. [Nikita Wilson ] ET: *sigh* [Mango Ara ] ET: joe, darlin, you loveable boy [Mango Ara ] Re: ET: Joe, this for you. ["~* cymbaline *~" ] ET: poems of despair ["~* cymbaline *~" ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 00:03:54 EDT From: RedWoodenBeads@aol.com Subject: ET: Re: haha In a message dated 4/20/00 7:38:59 PM Pacific Daylight Time, owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org writes: << Date: Thu, 20 Apr 2000 22:09:27 -0400 (EDT) From: courtney gordon Subject: ET: joe bashing Dear Angels, I know this is just stating the obvious, and I'm sure some of you are getting tired of the Joe bashing, but I'd just like to say Joe, you my friend, are the biggest asshole on earth. >> wow you need to get out more no longer cradled in gravity's memory still in and spinning in spiral drifts of endlessness spinning in torment into the garden of light - -Pale Saints "A Thousand Stars Burst Open" http://www.chickpages.com/musicmania/joepages ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 00:05:14 EDT From: RedWoodenBeads@aol.com Subject: ET: Re: haha! this is too funny! In a message dated 4/20/00 7:38:59 PM Pacific Daylight Time, owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org writes: << I almost feel sorry for you because everyone and their cousin is flaming you (and dammit all to hell they should!) >> Oh my God, I feel so threatened! I am being attacked by a bunch of touchy-feely people with no lives who poop gold! Ahhh, I think I will go cry! no longer cradled in gravity's memory still in and spinning in spiral drifts of endlessness spinning in torment into the garden of light - -Pale Saints "A Thousand Stars Burst Open" http://www.chickpages.com/musicmania/joepages ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 00:12:48 EDT From: RedWoodenBeads@aol.com Subject: ET: Re: i love animals In a message dated 4/19/00 9:02:14 PM Pacific Daylight Time, owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org writes: << I'm going to agree with Summer here. How many times have you experienced this so called 'animal life?' >> well, considering tha fact that I have three horses, four dogs, four cats, three parots, three ducks, two gerbils and around 20 chickens I would say I have experienced a lot more than any of you fuckheads. no longer cradled in gravity's memory still in and spinning in spiral drifts of endlessness spinning in torment into the garden of light - -Pale Saints "A Thousand Stars Burst Open" http://www.chickpages.com/musicmania/joepages ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 00:14:13 EDT From: RedWoodenBeads@aol.com Subject: ET: Re: population In a message dated 4/19/00 9:02:14 PM Pacific Daylight Time, owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org writes: << WE REALLY DONT NEED THIS MANY PEOPLE told me that i should be the first and kill myself. alright that is fucking wrong. i dont care how strongly you feel about something that i fucking crossing the line. >> haha, this is killing me! you make a completely anti-life statement and then I offer a similarly anti-life solution and you act like I am in the wrong? I don't care how deep yout hink you are, fuck you. no longer cradled in gravity's memory still in and spinning in spiral drifts of endlessness spinning in torment into the garden of light - -Pale Saints "A Thousand Stars Burst Open" http://www.chickpages.com/musicmania/joepages ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 00:17:47 EDT From: RedWoodenBeads@aol.com Subject: ET: geez In a message dated 4/20/00 9:02:14 PM Pacific Daylight Time, owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org writes: << Strangely enough, Joe, I don't see somebody being his own person. What I see is a petulant little boy convincing himself that he's a "real man" because he can piss off some girls by calling them names and pulling their hair. That's pretty entry-level, Joe. I have a 4 year old nephew who's better at it than this. >> Well you don't see much do you. Your opinion is not higher than mine. God, we have some egos here. This list has nothing to do with my life. You people treat it like it's a part of the real world or something. Geeez, get a grip. no longer cradled in gravity's memory still in and spinning in spiral drifts of endlessness spinning in torment into the garden of light - -Pale Saints "A Thousand Stars Burst Open" http://www.chickpages.com/musicmania/joepages ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 00:29:06 -0400 (Eastern Daylight Time) From: kara garbe Subject: ET: i think we're all sick of this guys, i think we're all getting sick of this, so i suggest we just stop responding to joe until he gets tired of it and quits bothering everyone. it's like what they say about bullies in sixth grade; ignore them and they go away. i think we all know where everyone stands in relation to what he says, so we should stop playing these games. ~k.g. ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 00:29:35 -0400 From: "Kevin B. Pease" Subject: ET: Re: geez RedWoodenBeads@aol.com writes: > Well you don't see much do you. I see enough, I think. > Your opinion is not higher than mine. God, we > have some egos here. Yes, we all DO have egos. It's kind of a part of being a conscious entity, Joe. But then, maybe you didn't know that. As for my opinion being "higher than yours," I don't think I ever said that, nor did I ever imply that. > This list has nothing to do with my life. And still, lately, you seem to be spending an awful lot of your life on something that has nothing to do with it... why is that, Joe? > You people treat it like it's a part of the real world or something News flash, genius: There are real people on the other end of the wire. This statement is very much like saying that if you say something over the phone, it doesn't count, because it's not like it's "the real world or something". Call up one of your friends, and tell him or her, "Hey, I hate you. Kill yourself, why don't you?" Then try to convince that person that it doesn't mean anything, because the phone "isn't the real world," and after all, they need to get a grip. This is a very real medium for communication, kiddo... if you don't understand that, than maybe you should put a little more thought into it. Anyway... I think I'm about done with you, and with this. For someone who was going to take the moral high road & end the conversation, you sure do talk a lot about the conversation you "ended". :) Kevin ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 20 Apr 2000 22:34:57 -0700 (PDT) From: Nikita Wilson Subject: Re: ET: Joe, this for you. Ok first pff $$%##@&@$#%@% ok now i feel better well i have one question for you then maybe you could justify what you said. HAVE YOU ever been that depressed you have thought about it??? I didnt think so. because you see if you had you would understand what the feeling are. You are a closed minded idot!! To say it with out swearing. i am not going to say everything that i wanted but you and having not expscrence the pain and say "suicide is bullshit." your bullshit - --- DPS8315@aol.com wrote: > well, not in his tone but in his attitude > nonetheless > > In a message dated 4/20/00 10:25:19 PM US Eastern > Standard Time, > cymbaline76@hotmail.com writes: > > I remember a time when I so SO depressed, and > wanted to die, that if > someone > > told me to kill myself, I probably would have! > > I always thought the whole "pity me" suicide bit was > a bunch of shit. Of > course I've never been there, and that's where a lot > of people would point to > say, "you dont understand".. so maybe this is me > reaching out for a deeper > understanding. nonetheless, I've known a few rough > times, where it seemed > like I was fighting myself and the whole world, and > the whole fucking thing > seems like a big lopsided battle.. one of my closest > friends periodically > goes through this pensive depressed state where she > looks like she's ..going > to kill *someone* anyway... > > Suicide has never been the answer, it's only been > that > should-have-been-temporary-but-was-a-bit-too-permanent-solution > that weak > people turned to. I've stuck it out in my middle > class suburban life, and > although there have been *many* times I would've > liked to slip out the > backdoor into a warm, sunny field of > emptiness&springtime, I've never said to > myself, or to anybody else, I'd like to die... or > I'm going to kill myself. > > Why? it's not because i'm some insensitive prick > who things nothing in the > world is so terrible that you could feel *that bad* > about how things are, > it's because no matter how dramatic I'd like to make > my current predicament > out to be, it's not that bad. plain and simple it's > not that bad. > > If you're so weak minded that someone, completely > unattached to your life, > could tell you to kill yourself.. and you'd listen > to them, well, I can't > imagine that you have any bigger problems. there is > no excuse for suicide. > it is completely idiotic and uncalled for, and > frankly I think that it is one > of the sickest diseases of society. the weak > succumb. > > suicide is bullshit. > ===== "When I was in there and it started to get bad.....I thought of you...you're the only one of us that still has a soul" "Thanks for the binoculars. Walter- Anytime. Anyplace, any position." " AM i under orders to honor and obey..just obey" " Have I ever told you that I love you? " " You should have let him do it" " You have to drink this..." " MUST...HAVE..GREEN..STUFF.." __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Send online invitations with Yahoo! Invites. http://invites.yahoo.com ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 20 Apr 2000 22:35:11 -0700 From: Mango Ara Subject: ET: *sigh* james. james james james. i agree with you in so many ways about your "suicide" post. but i have to say, i can see both sides of it... as a girl who once slit her wrists with the intention of killing herself. suicide is NOT bullshit. it is a very sensitive subject to some people and so, just be careful what you say. because while i agree and applaude you on many of your points and ways of thinking, serious depression is not something to be brushed off lightly. and it's unfair and hurtful to some to disregard it as being for the wimpy, self-pitying little moron. it's much deeper than that. when you cannot stand the skin you live in, when you feel so numb or so sick or so miserable that you think everything would be better without you and you can't stand to go on living, it's hardly wimpy. i agree it's wimping out in the end, but it's extremely difficult and not something to be taken so lightly. ~samara > > well, not in his tone but in his attitude nonetheless > > In a message dated 4/20/00 10:25:19 PM US Eastern Standard Time, > cymbaline76@hotmail.com writes: > > I remember a time when I so SO depressed, and wanted to die, that if > someone > > told me to kill myself, I probably would have! > > I always thought the whole "pity me" suicide bit was a bunch of shit. Of > course I've never been there, and that's where a lot of people would point to > say, "you dont understand".. so maybe this is me reaching out for a deeper > understanding. nonetheless, I've known a few rough times, where it seemed > like I was fighting myself and the whole world, and the whole fucking thing > seems like a big lopsided battle.. one of my closest friends periodically > goes through this pensive depressed state where she looks like she's ..going > to kill *someone* anyway... > > Suicide has never been the answer, it's only been that > should-have-been-temporary-but-was-a-bit-too-permanent-solution that weak > people turned to. I've stuck it out in my middle class suburban life, and > although there have been *many* times I would've liked to slip out the > backdoor into a warm, sunny field of emptiness&springtime, I've never said to > myself, or to anybody else, I'd like to die... or I'm going to kill myself. > > Why? it's not because i'm some insensitive prick who things nothing in the > world is so terrible that you could feel *that bad* about how things are, > it's because no matter how dramatic I'd like to make my current predicament > out to be, it's not that bad. plain and simple it's not that bad. > > If you're so weak minded that someone, completely unattached to your life, > could tell you to kill yourself.. and you'd listen to them, well, I can't > imagine that you have any bigger problems. there is no excuse for suicide. > it is completely idiotic and uncalled for, and frankly I think that it is one > of the sickest diseases of society. the weak succumb. > > suicide is bullshit. > > ------------------------------ > > End of eda-thoughts-digest V3 #150 > ********************************** - -- Diva-to-be curvy exterior volcanic interior ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 20 Apr 2000 22:36:29 -0700 From: Mango Ara Subject: ET: joe, darlin, you loveable boy really um...i only have one thing to say: >>> (some very insulting and borderline-nasty stuff critiquing summer or sam or kat, i can't member..but here's a rebuttal) > Your post was rather interesting, it was fucking nail right on the head, was what it was.thank you very much whoever wrote it, sorry i'm not naming names, it's been a long day. ;) I disagree, that post was a load of shit<<< i really REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY resent that joe. i never called your opinions a load of shit and it is all i can do to be nice and say, OW. that was mean. - -- Diva-to-be curvy exterior volcanic interior ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 12:02:02 GMT From: "~* cymbaline *~" Subject: Re: ET: Joe, this for you. Suicide is not bullshit. and Deep depression is a horrible, horrible fleeing. Its not like I go out and say "I'm going to pity myself, and make people feel sorry for me." I dont want that at all! Everything feels so numb, all you see is blackness, there's no hope, no laughter (except the laughter you use, to hide your despair). I've been there since I was 14. Who ever said "you can't brush depression off lightly" you're right. And someone WON'T truely understand it, unless they experience it. I went through 3 1/2 years of shit during high school, after I tried to kill myself. I wasn't doing it for attention, no. JUST because of the fact I tried to commit suicide, and because I was depressed, I was dubbed as the school psycho, and no one wanted me around. Not even one of my teachers. I tried to make friends, but they would yell at me to stay away, and spread rumors about me. They were perfect examples of people who don't understand suicide, and depression. Its not a call for attention. Not at all.... (maybe when i get home from taking my final, i'll post a couple of journal entries from when i was in HS, so you all can sede exactly how I was feeling) Peace, Cym ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2000 15:18:48 GMT From: "~* cymbaline *~" Subject: ET: poems of despair i wrote these a few years back when i was at rock bottom. these are just a few of the many. "no one" i scream (no one hears) i speak (no one understands) i cry (no one sees) i die (no one cares) "seclusion" darkened room a little girl all alone in a concrete world. crying... crying... love is sought. drowning... drowning... in a flood of thoughts. falling... falling... to the depths of despair. "help me..." "help me..." no one cares. "take me... take me... from all this hate." dying... dying... it's too late. darkened room a little girl dies alone... in a concrete world. "alone" confusion drips down my face. fear awakens. dimming light into dark, a somber soul lies rejected. "to vanish" darkness once again surrounds me blood drips from my pale skin lying naked in ice cold snow hoping i'll freeze to death and vanish within this void into the nothingness i am. "invisible" above the flowing stream i stand looking down looking for my reflection and see nothing "perhaps" perhaps i'll never know fantasies like ones you dream of, for my dreams are just vivid imaginations that died. great insanity lures me and opens an utterly dismal realm, where i sit reminiscing of once gentle waters, that are now endlessly raging. knowledge marks another shadowed, oppressed night, when i realize my insanity contributes to this harsh and absurd reality of despair. as i wander in this remotely isolated, grey and hostile tunnel we call "life", i see my youthful days pass by me, and i run this race, eagerly trying to catch up. "emptiness" emptiness a hollow void falling deeper i hear faint echoes of my thoughts bouncing off walls trapped. (c)1995-1999 cymbaline ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V3 #151 **********************************