From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #139 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Tuesday, April 18 2000 Volume 03 : Number 139 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V3 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: 90210 ["stephen" ] ET: Warrant for a Fool(poem) ["Seth D. Fulmer" ] Re: ET: 90210 [DPS8315@aol.com] Re: ET: You had questions? [DPS8315@aol.com] Re: ET: infatation [DPS8315@aol.com] Re: ET: "smart" [DPS8315@aol.com] Re: ET: "smart" [kara garbe ] ET: i dunno juss sum words ["* windex *" ] ET: other inventories of beings.. :) [shivergirl ] Re: ET: other inventories of beings.. :) [kara garbe ] ET: Poem (Garden of Earthly Delights) [Chris ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 08:01:10 -0400 From: "stephen" Subject: ET: 90210 i refuse to speak anymore on the matter of infatuation and all that (excuse me) CRAP.. It's not complicated... I don't know .. People just need to stop being the puppets of chemicals.. sorry for the outburst.. I'm not trying to offend anyone.. This group has helped me through tremendously bad times. (hugs) ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 10:31:32 -0400 From: "Seth D. Fulmer" Subject: ET: Warrant for a Fool(poem) Hi :) I really wrote this last night after I signed off but before I actually went to bed. hehe I found as soon as I turned the lights off I wasn't tired anymore. Anyhow, like if you have any questions, comments, and the like, let me know :) I have a few yet...I'll probably get them out sometime :) If you really feel an urge to read my poetry, go to www.pathetic.org/members/sefulmer. If you don't want to receive my poetry, let me know and I won't send it :) Take cares and Have a Great Day! :o) -Seth ======================================== Warrant for a Fool by Seth D. Fulmer 4-17-00 Oh really why does it feel some days like the world has a warrant for me The whole world really hates me but puts up with me for amusement I say Hi to a friend as I pass by her head She doesn't say a word and walks on like I'm dead I called up my mother and she said "What do you want?" You want to tell her you love her but the words just won't come out Lately I've been wanting a girlfriend so very badly Suddenly I find one Is this a cruel joke or for real? She ties me down, I can't look at others even though we've not yet met For all I know "she"'s a guy playing a joke Why can't fate just let me love? ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 13:48:56 EDT From: DPS8315@aol.com Subject: Re: ET: 90210 In a message dated 4/17/00 7:02:49 AM US Eastern Standard Time, erlenmeyer@interpath.com writes: > i refuse to speak anymore on the matter of infatuation and all that (excuse > me) CRAP.. > > It's not complicated... I don't know .. > > People just need to stop being the puppets of chemicals.. I wouldn't have apologized for this little outburst, but it's a bit incoherant from my perspective and I genuinely want you to elaborate to me personally, or publically to the list, what exactly you meant ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 13:48:53 EDT From: DPS8315@aol.com Subject: Re: ET: You had questions? In a message dated 4/16/00 7:11:00 PM US Eastern Standard Time, lakini@virginia.edu writes: > some people at 16 are more capable of forming > lasting relationships than other people are at the age of 30.... rock on! so, when we're all grown up and have the kiddies that to this day, we proclaim we never will, let us all remember what it was like, to fall in love, to feel love, to be in love, and indeed how true it is.. (let's also remember that we want to raise our children to be mature enough to handle, at the ripe old age of 16, things like lasting friendships, independence, even, dare I say it, love) James ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 13:48:51 EDT From: DPS8315@aol.com Subject: Re: ET: infatation In a message dated 4/16/00 1:18:36 PM US Eastern Standard Time, jackies_strength20@yahoo.com writes: > god he was put so high above > me. i realized though, even then, that it couldnt have > been love. bc love is much more then that. "I just couldn't let this because I disagree so vehemently" - as kara once responded to something.. *this* ladies and gentlemen must be the claim of one who has lost her faith in dreams! why, after all, do we ever hold such high aspirations, if we do not believe that one day, based upon our own greatness, we shall hold in our own arms the objects of distant affection? It disturbs me greatly to think that anyone would deny themselves the possibilities of such fruitiful indulgence at the foot of impossibility! Why not should we, every day attack and persue the greatness we see in others? Why not should we spend every waking moment in pursuit of the greatest beauty, the greatest mind, the greatest possibility? Ladies and Gentlemen, I submit to you that the greatest joy may indeed be found atop the summit of that mountain which begins as simple infatuation! Why could not it be, that indeed love may be found, may even be built upon a foundation that at first glance is infatuation? Who is to say that those whom we hold highest above us, could never be our lovers? After all, being held in such high admiration is merely a case of perspective.. I don't think that I've managed to clearly make the point I'm trying to... I'm just saying that there's nothing wrong with chasing that girl you've always wanted. ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 13:48:48 EDT From: DPS8315@aol.com Subject: Re: ET: "smart" In a message dated 4/15/00 10:18:42 PM US Eastern Standard Time, cmgordon2@juno.com writes: > He said he thought if he considered > himself smart, he'd be defining that part of him based on what everyone else > thinks, and that's weak...he said the word "smart" shouldn't exist. This brings up one of my long held observations about a particular group of "smart" kids who just happen to live in the same city, and attend many of the same classes, as I do.. I remember back, in the days of "will you go out with me", I got all As.. I did my homework in the provided time at school, I did it well, and my teachers loved me.. so did my fellow students, whom I allowed to copy my assignments at convenience.. I was smart. my teachers recognized it, my classmates recognized it, my parents recognized it.. I'm a junior in high school now. I dont quite make all As (although i did last grading period) and now we've got all these special classes for me to go to- "smart people classes" as they are commonly referred to. A lot of times, in classes where I am forced to mingle with the below average (classes like world history and photography)- my true colors will come out during conversation, no matter how much I try to fit in. After this happens a few times, I get asked repeatedly, sometimes by the same people over and over, "are you really smart or something?" Typically my response is a plain and simple yes- I'm not ashamed to say that I'm smart, and although my nonchalant compliance with their label lends authority to any over generalization they'd like to toss my way, I am content with knowing that I am intelligent indeed, that people respect me being "smart", and irregardless of my intelligence I am a capable person in most arenas. Now, back to all those "smart people" I know- there are a lot of my peers who I regard as "smart"- book smart as it is, the valedictorians and a few of them who quickly grasp the calculus.. or perchance understand exactly what our physics teacher is saying, just before I do... the interesting thing about them, is that in general, I know they're not street smart, a lot of them dont understand the way the world works, and they aren't willing to take the necessary risks to learn things about life and love and the beautiful way the world is colored. there are a few however, that not only have the great ability to perform in class, but also are able to function on a similar level in the real world- hence they hold the greatest capacity for greatness.. in this respect, I think it necessary to review cirriculum in high school- we teach about the past, a series of survey courses on what caused what where, but never really take an in-depth look into the way individual people, with all of their quircks and maxims, truly affected the course of history- indeed, how each and every one of us must daily review the way we live our life to ensure that we are not merely pursuing a pathetic course of non-creation, of non-existence, an endless pursuit that will not find us in text books or cited in the footnotes of anyone's poetry, merely a course or path that we sped down all to quickly, to find the broken remnants of years of fruitiful work - -a post with no point or conclusion, I feel so special as to have joined that elite group! ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 18:10:22 -0400 (Eastern Daylight Time) From: kara garbe Subject: Re: ET: "smart" james wrote: > there are a few however, that not only have the great > ability to perform in class, but also are able to function on a similar level > in the real world- hence they hold the greatest capacity for greatness.. so true. > in this respect, I think it necessary to review cirriculum in he may be a "smart" guy, but he can't spell curriculum... :) i couldn't resist! > high school- > we teach about the past, a series of survey courses on what caused what > where, but never really take an in-depth look into the way individual people, > with all of their quircks and maxims, truly affected the course of history- i think you're saying something important here. there should be classes where you just study some of the really Great People who've influenced the past and present, and read their autobiographies and biographies and find out about their lives... there are so many people out there who manage to make such huge differences... the current Dalai Lama comes to mind, but there are and have been many many influential leaders, and others who weren't in any position of political leadership but were hugely influential. i'd imagine that studying them, trying to figure out how they thought and what path they took to accomplished things, would be an amazing and beneficial thing... hm, perhaps a summer project for myself... ~kara ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 12:53:11 MDT From: "* windex *" Subject: ET: i dunno juss sum words sometimes I breath to quickly and my mind tells me someone will notice I will stand out for something I dont like It scares me when I walk into a room that people will look and see all the things I see and they won't like me because I don't like me I've tried day after day to be that person I can love know that person inside of me that makes me smile I working on it slowley unsurley Im wanting to be someone else anyone but me ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 21:09:00 -0400 From: shivergirl Subject: ET: other inventories of beings.. :) courtney gordon wrote: > Dear Angels, > I read a lot of posts on angels and what they do and don't like, and > realized there was a lot of stuff I could have said and didn't. > I like obscure names that not too many people have. Like Kedree, Genysis, > and Schuylar. like in good will hunting? :)but yesh, me too! this guy at my werk told me today my name meant "bright star" or "northern star" in hindi! yay! :) > I am bisexual. (Hope > I didn't shock anybody there, I know I haven't said it before) what's the shock? aren't we all, fundamentally? > That's enough for now. > Love and such > Courtney a pleasure to read. thank you. :)taRA. :) ~~~ "at overleve er at rejse" (to survive means to leave) - --hans christian andersen ~~~ "hi. now you say something." ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 22:07:02 -0400 (Eastern Daylight Time) From: kara garbe Subject: Re: ET: other inventories of beings.. :) shivergirl wrote: > > courtney gordon wrote: > > > I am bisexual. (Hope > > I didn't shock anybody there, I know I haven't said it before) > > what's the shock? aren't we all, fundamentally? hmmm. interesting thought. care to elaborate for us? i'm curious as to why you say that. along these lines, i was listening to ani difranco today, and she makes what i think is a really good (and beautiful, actually) point about bisexuality: I just want more than one membership to more than one club, because I owe my life to the people that I love .... some days the line I walk turns out to be straight, other days the line tends to deviate, I've got no criteria for sex or race, I just want to hear your voice, I just want to see your face. "In or Out" Ani DiFranco anyway, that's all, back to work for me. ~kara ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 22:35:04 -0400 From: Annie Subject: ET: Partial to the waking dream (Prose) I should have loved the ocean instead. At least then, I could drown and not feel this dead. It is a waking dream partial to my fingers; that every night, I rise with my eyes like gauze, silk chiffon hair and lashes. The heavy brow of wandering is becoming encrusted with glitter, and the wagging tongue of living is beginning to giggle. Of course, it is all very psychotic. And nothing is methodical or routine. That is just the way it is for me. I rise and claw at the dirt, not knowing what to expect. And it grows on me. I breathe in and fill my lungs with seashell odored air. What? A taint of blood among the primrose and thistle. A splash of danger, a trace of something clammy and morbid. The humidity claws at mwilting hair. The sin, the sin. Every night, with the turn of the moon's unblinking eye, I become someone else. It is naught as though I try to become this thing. Something takes me over and I drown in a pool of strange. Thoughts that are not my own. Sometimes mistaken for a dream someone thought up vaguely, am I, for never am I seen by a usual, speculating eye. My hands rake across the fresh graves. My tongue is moving, I feel it wriggling; but no sound comes forth. And then, without trying at all, I release it. The bird in my mouth that is a scream. She flies, flies, far above this dirty world, and I am wont to raise my eyes and watch it go. Somewhat forlorn. Then I return to my bed and can only wait. The next night is dawning. I feel it in my bones. And with the awakening comes the fear of what will come. I have seen others like myself, others used to this routine. But I long for the not-routine. Red, sweet mouthfuls of blood like an explosion of blackberries on my tongue, images that dance in my mind even when I do not call them. And they tempt me as I thought they never could. Yet I am not fang, nor undead; at least, I do not believe so. I do not accustom myself to the habit of killing. Yet my langauge is violence and my hands are piercing, ready to maim. A defensive mechanism, I rationalize. Defense for what I have become. I no longer feel alive. I merely am, without pain, without ecstasy. My own pleasure is of the mind, the intangible. And so I have only my thoughts, and vaguely, the thoughts of others of my kind. I still speak, but it is not nearly as brilliant a hue as once it seemed. Out of the depths I cry to the intangible angels. ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2000 22:45:07 -0400 From: Chris Subject: ET: Poem (Garden of Earthly Delights) This poem is a little critical of college, but all too true from my experiences. So I guess this is a warning to those who enjoy college to escape. The title comes from Bosch's painting and I think we are frustrated by the same things even though the years that separate us are many. Anyway, comments welcome. Garden of Earthly Delights As I step aside to dodge the vomit in the trash-filled hall, My mind begins to race, alone with morning grace, And as I push the empty bear cans out of my shower stall, I know why I never can feel clean in the dirty place. * Oh! College what would I do without you? * I reach class by a path lined with walking skeletons and dead cigarettes, As I sit through another pointless lecture, I ponder my fate. Yet my thoughts are always about ancient pains and sorrowful regrets, Are interrupted by the constant flow of late students late. * Oh! College what would I do without you? * My weary body comes home for a rest, but it seems The drunks next door play hip-hop from morning to midnight Mixed in with the occasionally feminine screams I realize this could only be the Garden of Earthly Delight. * Oh! College what would I do without you? - ----------------------------------------------------- Click here for Free Video!! http://www.gohip.com/freevideo/ ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V3 #139 **********************************