From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V2 #187 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Tuesday, June 29 1999 Volume 02 : Number 187 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V2 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: Hole -eo ["Scott S." ] ET: Going once...Vancouver concert.. [Erin Benoit ] ET: Fw: Gulf Coast Gathering of Angels ["Rizioule" ] ET: Fw: Gulf Coast Gathering of Angels ["Rizioule" ] [none] [Mandabear Four ] ET: poem [Courtney M Gordon ] ET: This past weekend part 1 [Seth Fulmer ] ET: This past weekend part 2 [Seth Fulmer ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Mon, 28 Jun 1999 23:43:09 -0500 From: "Scott S." Subject: ET: Hole -eo Howdy, Just wondering if anyone knew of a good Hole/ Courtney e-mail list? Thanks!! (Court G.???) "Scott S." -Big Sexy Angel "FEAR IS NOTHING MORE THAN AN ADVENTURE TO BE BROKEN!" P.E.A.C.C.EŠ President/Founder and Proud EDA! http://homestead.com/rocksolid ICQ#9685289 ___________________________________________________________________ Get the Internet just the way you want it. Free software, free e-mail, and free Internet access for a month! Try Juno Web: http://dl.www.juno.com/dynoget/tagj. ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 28 Jun 1999 23:41:00 PDT From: Erin Benoit Subject: ET: Going once...Vancouver concert.. Halo Angels, Well, tomorrow I leave for Vancouver and within 2 sleeps after that (assuming I get any sleep) I will be seeing Jewel and Steve in concert LIVE! I can not wait! I also can't wait to place faces to names of some of you other Angels and that is what this post is about. I have yet to hear from a few of you who will be attending the July 2nd concert at GM Place. Please email me as some plans have changed. I will be able to continue getting my email while in Vancouver so feel free to email me. It would also be helpful to have some of your phone numbers who live in the Vancouver area. So we can make plans as we go. With Thursday being Canada Day we have thought better of the idea of going to Playland as it will be crowded. Also we were thinking of meeting at GM Place around 4pm the day of the the concert and walk to a restaurant from there. Please contact me before Thursday if you are planning on meeting us anywhere. Thanks and see you soon! Smiles and Sunshiny days! Erin "Be there or be square...rectangular...octagonal...etc..." ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 29 Jun 1999 04:51:22 EDT From: ICURMINE@aol.com Subject: ET: Chicago Hi all... I know this has been posted to one of the lists before but i wasnt paying attention cuz i didnt think i could go. Is anyone planning on meeting before the Tinley Park show? Is anyone else going? I am incredibly pumped! this will be my first time seeing Jewel and the second time ive seen Steve. Tim the paper angel ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 29 Jun 1999 12:19:46 -0700 (PDT) From: Jason Vierling Subject: ET: Nasa Fireworks on East Coast Hi Guys, I just thought I would share this with you because I thought it was interesting :) Take Care, Jason V Arunsun on IRC & ICQ Arnsun on AOL IM SCIENTIFIC "FIREWORKS DISPLAY" SET FOR EAST COAST IN JULY NASA will set off its own Independence Day fireworks during a series of nighttime rocket launches from July 2 to 20, 1999. Designed to study "space weather" -- the interaction of the solar wind with the Earth's magnetic field and atmosphere -- the experiments will focus on improving our understanding of electrically charged atoms at the edge of space. During the 19-day period, two suborbital rockets will be launched on each of two nights between 9:30 p.m. and 4 a.m. EDT from the NASA Goddard Space Flight Center's Wallops Flight Facility, Wallops Island, VA. Two of the experiment packages will release a chemical that will form large glowing clouds in space. These luminescent milky-white clouds should be visible to the naked eye for several hundred miles from the launch site, encompassing the mid-Atlantic region and portions of the northeastern and southeastern United States. The clouds should be visible for 10 to 20 minutes to the southeast of the launch site at about 70 degrees elevation (approximately three-quarters of the way between the horizon and the point of the sky that appears to be directly above an observer). _________________________________________________________ DO YOU YAHOO!? Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 29 Jun 1999 14:58:26 -0700 From: "Rizioule" Subject: ET: Fw: Gulf Coast Gathering of Angels Rizioule World of Rizioule Interactive Adventure http://www.homestead.com/rizioule/ " Gathering of Angels" Concert Tour "Music for the World to Love By" http://www.homestead.com/GatheringofAngels/ Begins 12:00 noon June 26th at Newbreak Newbreak on the Beach on the Beach 1959 Abbott St 1959 Abbott St. Ocean Beach Ocean Beach San Diego California San Diego California And continues June 27th 12:00 noon at Sloppy Joe's 31 Fortune Drive Irvine California inside the magnificient Irvine Spectrum ( you can WALK to Jewels Concert from here ! ) Reserve you seats now at Rizioule@hotmail.com - ----- Original Message ----- From: Rizioule Sound To: ; eda-thoughts ; JK Digest ; edasocal Sent: Tuesday, June 29, 1999 2:57 PM Subject: Gulf Coast Gathering of Angels > Hello Angels, > > This will be especially interesting to those of you in the Gulf Coast Area ! > > We are planning a Gathering of Angels in New Orleans July 11th > the Location is right in the thick of the French Quarter at : > > Tropical Isle > 721 Bourbon St. > New Orleans, Louisiana > > Sunday July 11th > > This Gathering of Angels will encompass a National Talent Showcase > so there will be lots of great entertainment. > > The venue will showcase a wide variety of musical talents and > all EDA musicians are encouraged to participate. > > The Gathering Begins at 12:00 noon with > live entertainment begining at 1:00 > > To researve your seats simply send your name, > and the number of people in your party to Rizioule@hotmail.com > with "Reservations" as the subject : ) > > Musicians reply with "musician" as the subject. > > If you would like more info about the, > Gathering of Angels Concert Tour, this show in particular > or past concert/gatherings then please visit the Gathering of Angels > Website. > http://www.homestead.com/GatheringofAngels/ > > Thanks, I hope meet many of you there ! > > > > Rizioule > > World of Rizioule Interactive Adventure > http://www.homestead.com/rizioule/ > > > " Gathering of Angels" Concert Tour > "Music for the World to Love By" > http://www.homestead.com/GatheringofAngels/ > > Reserve you seats now at > Rizioule@hotmail.com > > ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 29 Jun 1999 15:00:26 -0700 From: "Rizioule" Subject: ET: Fw: Gulf Coast Gathering of Angels > > > Hello Angels, > > > > This will be especially interesting to those of you in the Gulf Coast Area > ! > > > > We are planning a Gathering of Angels in New Orleans July 11th > > the Location is right in the thick of the French Quarter at : > > > > Tropical Isle > > 721 Bourbon St. > > New Orleans, Louisiana > > > > Sunday July 11th > > > > This Gathering of Angels will encompass a National Talent Showcase > > so there will be lots of great entertainment. > > > > The venue will showcase a wide variety of musical talents and > > all EDA musicians are encouraged to participate. > > > > The Gathering Begins at 12:00 noon with > > live entertainment begining at 1:00 > > > > To researve your seats simply send your name, > > and the number of people in your party to Rizioule@hotmail.com > > with "Reservations" as the subject : ) > > > > Musicians reply with "musician" as the subject. > > > > If you would like more info about the, > > Gathering of Angels Concert Tour, this show in particular > > or past concert/gatherings then please visit the Gathering of Angels > > Website. > > http://www.homestead.com/GatheringofAngels/ > > > > Thanks, I hope meet many of you there ! > > > > > > > > Rizioule > > > > World of Rizioule Interactive Adventure > > http://www.homestead.com/rizioule/ > > > > > > " Gathering of Angels" Concert Tour > > "Music for the World to Love By" > > http://www.homestead.com/GatheringofAngels/ > > > > Reserve you seats now at > > Rizioule@hotmail.com > > > > > ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 29 Jun 1999 19:54:30 -0400 From: Mandabear Four Subject: [none] Are there any lonely ppls out there? I'm stuck home and don't know what to do with myself. Anyone wanna chat? I'm from the boring state of Connecticut but live in the state of Confusion most of the time. Look forward to hearing from any of ya'll. ~Mandabear~ The Forever Seeking Teen Angel ___________________________________________________________________ Get the Internet just the way you want it. Free software, free e-mail, and free Internet access for a month! Try Juno Web: http://dl.www.juno.com/dynoget/tagj. ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 29 Jun 1999 20:15:13 -0400 From: Courtney M Gordon Subject: ET: poem <> Those were the wierd nights. The ones that reeked of the surprise of blooming sexuality. The ones where we could lie in each other's arms fully knowing that we were nothing more than good friends who just so happened to lay every now and again. Then I didn't know i loved you. So I now feel awkward accepting your tangerine lips and i can no longer taste your strawberry kisses. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ <> I didn't understand you. But I was there for you. I didn't help you when you needed it. But I stood up for you when you were to weak to do it yourself. I was just your part time friend. But everytime you cried about your father i was there. I never supported you. But I was always willing to listen when you needed me. Jenny's a better person that me. But Jenny never was there for you. Your father died and i was there. You and your mom got in a fight and i was there. You felt depressecd and I was there. You just needed a shoulder to cry on and I was there. But I was only a part time friend. I understand now. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ comments and questions accepted with open arms! love and luck always courtney ___________________________________________________________________ Get the Internet just the way you want it. Free software, free e-mail, and free Internet access for a month! Try Juno Web: http://dl.www.juno.com/dynoget/tagj. ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 29 Jun 1999 23:04:58 -0400 (EDT) From: Seth Fulmer Subject: ET: This past weekend part 1 This past weekend, as I had said, I went up to visit Holly. I took Amtrak from Philadelphia through NYC to Syracuse. Now, I started my own emotional journey here. I was standing at the train waiting for it, and my heartrate was really fast. Plus, I was worried already that Holly would have forgotten about me. Never before have I become anxious or nervous over a train. I didn't think it was possible for an inanimate object to upset me(*smirk* sorta joke). I began right away on the train on my belief that there's something psychologically wrong with me. I already know there is, but I figured if I have 8 hours ahead of me, I can think about it. I basically found that I do have repressed things but to try to surface them without someone's help might drive me mad. I guess I shouldn't have been reading my Abnormal Psychology book at the time though because I was looking at myself from like every perspective imaginable. Anyhow, I finally got to Syracuse. Holly was supposed to pick me up there and take me back to Oswego at 8:20PM. Well, after like 9:00 I was ready to go find a bus and go home(no more trains going from Syracuse to Philadelphia or even NYC) because frankly I had lost faith and was beginning to believe all my friends here that say "Just drop her...You have no chance"(even though I've been telling myself that even if the reward is miniscule, it's worth all the trouble). Anyhow, a convertible pulled up at like 9:15 or so driven by Holly's boyfriend and Holly was in the passenger's seat. Now, in the past I've sorta developed a slowly increasing hatred for her boyfriend...and I forget who but someone had said that that was natural..like male competition...I personally say "Fooey! I don't believe that!". Anyhow, I have to commend him. I will temporarily forget the part of me that says that he was doing it with an alternative motive, but he and I got into this conversation, and then we stopped at a station for gas and he got ice cream bars for Holly, himself, and me (screw the grammar..I don't know the order that those 3 should go in). Then, we were going back to Oswego and he's telling me about how he and Holly wanted to take me to some carnival. I didn't mind of course. He like totally reminds me of my dad (except my dad doesn't smoke and curses only a quarter as much) because he acted like I was from a different world totally and my dad sometimes treats me with my computer knowledge like I'm from a different world or time period. At the carnival, I totally felt "single" because Holly had her boyfriend and with his kids(Ron-her boyfriend has a boy and a girl 9 yrs old each) they looked like such a cute family. Well, after we left and went back to their house, we pretty much just laid down to go to sleep and talked. Holly had told me that Ron thought it weird last time I was up there when he slept on the one side of the bed, I slept on the other and Holly was in the middle. That's totally understandable and I can sleep anywhere(literally and I have!)...so they set up these foldout kids couches(I guess you'd call them that) and I slept on that. They were watching TV and (like my dad) Ron was cursing(except my dad would just be upset at the race stuff and wouldn't curse) at the TV(as if the TV would do anything in return to please him). The next day, I was just sitting there watching the interaction between them all. The guy that lives(well, he's moving out now) there has this little daughter (I'd say about 4 or 5 yrs max but I don't know) who was soo cute! I was listening to my music(Jennifer Lopez is my current obsession) and I felt bad ignoring her so I turned it off...not that I could understand the little girl's babble(I can't understand kidtalk)...she was speaking english..it was just slurred and slow..."Where's"(wait 30-45 secs)"my"(only didn't sound like "my" too much)"dad"(wait 30-45 seconds)"dy"(I'm serious!..I thought it was amusing when I figured out what she said). Holly and I finally left though I was glad because I was having trouble restraining myself from saying stuff to Ron...For one thing, you don't hit a kid on the head(cheek, mouth, ass, but not top/back of head) like he did the night before at the carnival for saying something that he didn't agree with(the kid didn't curse or anything)..no matter what! Plus, I don't think he should be smoking around the children, or cursing..at least not at the amount he does. He uses the finger and the 4 letter F word more time than the 4 letter "L" word(that's "love") to Holly. Now, since I am not sure if I told where we were going, I'll say now. Holly and I were going to be going to a picnic in Buffalo, NY. On the way we just listened to music and talked(I'm ashamed to say I don't remember every word that was said here..I should be beaten..I remember things that she said whispering one time but not those conversations). We finally got there though. Well, I'll continue in the next one ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 29 Jun 1999 23:05:47 -0400 (EDT) From: Seth Fulmer Subject: ET: This past weekend part 2 Well, arriving at the picnic, we were greeted by this one brother/friend(this picnic was for our service fraternity Alpha Phi Omega) of ours Joe(his nickname is Timber and I will probably use that interchangeably). Joe's situation is that he was married once, had a child in that union and then was divorced with his wife. Now, he has a gambling problem, and is a major leach. He never bothered me until this time though. I always thought it was cool that he hung around my chapter and me. Anyhow, he went over and everyone was talking and then he went to start the grill for the burgers and hot dogs. Holly went over and then later on I went over too. We(Timber and I) started making cheese jokes(Holly's nickname is chez cuz she likes Cheese a lot!). Well, later on(maybe 15-20-30-45 in that range mins later) Joe was sitting on the other side of Holly..and Admittedly Holly and I aren't dating. I guess I sorta got a small understanding of how I feel about her and how I should feel..I'll talk about that later though). He says "Holly, we should hook up at the section 88 picnic"(my fraternity's split into sections and the Section 88 picnic is in 2 weeks..this was the 89 picnic). I just basically laughed because in my mind I knew he had no chance with her because she had a boyfriend and that she didn't date brothers in the fraternity. But I kept my mouth shut. Then, he called me out from the shelter(where we were all congregated) and asked me what was between me and Holly. I said we were just friends. All the while, Holly's mouthing to me in the distance not to tell him. I looked at her and just shook my head yes. Then he told me that he was gonna try to get her to the 88 picnic and I should go too. I can't go though because that weekend's a retreat for my fraternity chapter and that would be really bad taste. I guess this is where my maturity kicked in because he tried to pull the "Holly will be there"(which falls into the category of "A Girl you like is there..what can you lose"). I trust that she wouldn't lie to me and tell me that she doesn't date brothers and date Joe. Admittedly he's 20 times more physically attractive than me, but I trust her not to just tell me an excuse like that. Well, later Joe, Holly, I, and a bunch of other people went to Niagra Falls(it was only like 15-30 mins away so we went). In the car, Joe was sitting on the one side and I was sitting on the other side. My leg was pushed up against hers because of the cramped space and I said "Holly, your legs are hot and I'm not talking attraction either". Joe then said "That's ok..I'll do that for you then. You're legs are Hot!" Plus then we were making sick jokes and things the whole time and I told Holly that if anything I said bothered her, I'd stop because I was just kidding..not trying to make her feel uncomfortable but have a good time in general. We got to the falls area and parked..and we had to wait for someone in a wheelchair who was driving herself and might need help getting out. Joe goes and tries to find a ATM machine..and asked me if I wanted to come along. I said I'd stay there...I can't just leave Holly alone..That's mean and besides..I L..Lo...Lo..Oh..foey..if I say it..it's like a spell..and will come back at me to haunt me(not that it hasn't already). Then we went over and on the way over I was kicking myself for acting like an asshole and basically giving Joe permission to pursue Holly when I had no right to. Afterwards, I wanted to forget how much I like Holly, so when we went to Bennigans, I ordered a Strawberry Daquiri and it was 2 for 1 night so I got 2 of them which I finished in 5 minutes(less actually). I was totally trashed and got the opposite of what I wanted..I was flirting with Holly and wanted her for her body then and was going after the waitress. So I asked for a Pepsi and downed 2 of those and sorta felt better but my head was still woozy. Once I got my dinner though I felt ok and someone said that it was probably cuz I was dehydrated from the long day in the sun and hadn't eaten since like 2:30(it was 10:30 or 11 at night). After Bennigans, we went back to Joe's apartment because it was around midnight and nobody wanted to drive back(it was 3 hr drive for Holly and I and a 4-5 hr drive for the other 2). We were debating on where to sleep and I've already slept in the same bed as Holly before so I didn't see why there would be any problem. She came back from changing in the bathroom and Joe repeated "Why don't I sleep with Holly?"(or something like that). And I ignored it..but when she was sitting down on the foldout couch where she was gonna sleep. I said I would prefer a mattress and asked her if she would have a problem with me using a small space. She said "Actually I would have a small problem" and I just took it at that. It was shocking but I didn't need to know why. Then, she put a pillow over my head and whispered "The last time Ron was in the bed and I felt comfortable and now he's not here.". I felt like I was going to hurl soo bad. Holly saw something was wrong and asked me and I couldn't speak cuz I was so embarassed. I went and called my mom and dad to see what I could do, and I felt a lot better(not perfect but better). Then I just layed there and thought to myself "That's a pile of bullshit!" because I was in the same bed as Holly after the dance on Valentines Day in Philly for a short time, and I was in the same bed as Sue when I was in Minneapolis for my fraternity's national convention and Sue's only 22. Well, the next morning, in the car coming back to Oswego, I was bugged by the way I got nauseous from what she said. She kept asking what's wrong and I explained how I hated it that I never have simple emotions, that I always have pure and strong emotions. I never simply like someone..I love them. I don't just get upset about someone, I experience wrath or anxiety. I don't just dislike someone or something, I hate them. She said "Why can't I just experience it and not think about it?" Then I explained how I felt when she told me what she told me with the pillow over my head and with the train. We stopped at the house and a little later we left for some pond and then a pool. At the pool, I didn't have a swimsuit so I just waded my feet but the kids and the others in the pool felt a need to soak me. Holly felt a need to do it too hehe :) Then from there, we all went to the train station. We arrived at like 3:30 PM. Holly, Ron's daughter Nichole, and I went in to buy the ticket because the train was scheduled for 3:42PM. The guy tells me that the train is 20 mins late, so Holly and I went up on the platform to wait for the train. Ron comes up and finds out that it's 20 mins late and goes around the platform exploring(like my dad would). Then he suggests that we all go and get something to drink. Down inside the terminal, he suggested that since the machines are so expensive, he drive down the road to a convenience store to get cheaper ones. Thank God for Holly but she suggested he go and get them by himself. The train came and he still hadn't returned. The thing that scares me again though was that when the train came, I got a knot in my stomach. I was sooo scared(that's the best description I have for it) and had to force myself to go near the train. I went and gave Holly a hug. I could seriously have melted there! I miss it sooo bad! :*( I got on the train, and after I gave my ticket to the guy..I just cried myself to sleep. I woke up like 2 hours later and after realizing where I was, ended up crying some more. I wish she was here. But I don't know if it's that or if it's the fact that I wish someone was here to take that place. Someone that I can hug, cuddle with, someone who I can talk to, hang with...someone who actually wants me to be around with them. That's one thing that I REALLY like about her. She doesn't see the intense disgust in my physical appearance, the true lack of beauty in me. She sees through my ugly parts of personality to the few good parts that there are. Now, today in my class on "Abnormal Psychology" we were talking about the "Cognitive Model" and how people have distorted thinking patterns. I am pretty sure there's something screwed up about my reasoning. If one of you see it, please let me know. I love her with every beat of my(and everyone else's) heart. I would do anything for her, even if it involved giving up my life. I feel like I'm under a love spell, except I know what I love, and why. I can't banish my feelings even though I know nothing can happen. If you read through the first part and even now...please let me know what you think is wrong with my thinking/reasoning. Maybe you see something differently and I need to readjust my viewpoint. In any case, take care and Have a Great Day! If you need more info or have suggestions, plese let me know :o) Seth D. Fulmer mailto:kaosking@voicenet.com ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V2 #187 **********************************