From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V2 #69 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Sunday, March 14 1999 Volume 02 : Number 069 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V2 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- Re: ET: Re: gone? [Mike Connell ] ET: well, no poems.. [Naomi Vaughn ] ET: life has become so complicted ["nameless angel" ] ET: .. [Miles and Prystowsky ] ET: ... [Rachel ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Sat, 13 Mar 1999 22:36:44 -0500 From: Mike Connell Subject: Re: ET: Re: gone? > Mike tells me that it *isn't* going to get axed... yep, it's staying :-) > But, if Mike's decision to let this list stay changes anytime in the >future, Sam's idea of a One List type of thing is a pretty good idea. Yeah, it would have been a good idea if needed. The reason I was going to close this list was actually primarily due to the fact I honestly thought I was going to drop all of my lists (like 24 of them), and the priority was to find a new owner for Jewel@smoe.......this ET list could have been re-opened as soon as a new owner was obtained for it......perhaps even Lara (who I've been meaning to train....but we just stopped emailing and IMing each other....Lara, you out there? :-) However, things changed quite dramatically overnight, and while there IS a lot of work to be done to make things better, that's all on the J list. Fret not, as long as smoe.org is alive and well, the ET list will have a home on it......it may have a new landlord or landlady someday, but its' home can and always will always be smoe.org :-) Mike :-)  : \    / :                    -- o -- :                      /    \ :                             .---.           .---. :                           /      \  @    /      \ :                         / / /     \(   ) /    \ \  \ :                       //////  /    '     `       --\\\\ :                     / /   /  / :         :   --\  \  \ \ :                    //  / /   /   /`     \     --\\ \   \\ :                  / /   /  /  / /  . .  . \ \  \    \   \ \                     We are everyday angels. :) ------------------------------ Date: 13 Mar 99 17:43:54 CST From: Naomi Vaughn Subject: ET: well, no poems.. well, this is a rare poemless post...unless I shrivel here on my own...and grab one for security. let's just see how it goes. I was working early this morning till just after 2...so, I missed the short course of the possibility of our little list closing...and i'm glad it worked out. i'd hate to lose what we've got going here. i've been thinking *alot* lately...about a lot of everything. i'm lucky to be able to be part of this group...such amazing people.... i've come to the conclusion i've become kinda terrible at saying what i mean...so, i apoligize. i just want you all to know i am very thankful...and i love and appreciate you all. so, my poetry's getting worse...not so much worse as in bad...just, its...lacking. not really satisfying me lately. i apoligize way too much...so, i will do my best to restrain from doing so for the rest of my rattlings. i'm not so good at going to people...and, well, talking. it started out just being my inability to ask for help...now it's just, ahh, i'm mute. your guys' poetry is so wonderful...and, i'm s*rry (heh) that i don't give the recognition deserved most times. oops, i do that alot...jump from topic to topic without pause...ummkay. i've been really...confused, as of late. not really knowing which end is up. and, you know, it's mighty difficult finding an answer when the problem itself is blurry. kara garbe...you know kara, she used to be on this list...well, a post of hers left a lasting impression on me. i came across it again recently, and it's just...well, here's a small portion... "i saw with clarity the fine line between inaction and action, that i can only relate in words as the line between hope and faith. faith is the force of change. faith is what not only gives you hope for the future, but gives you belief in today. faith is belief in yourself, not in a distant event that will transform your life and give you everything that you have always wanted. faith is what gives you happiness in the present. faith is what makes you see the strength within yourself, the strength to overcome whatever you face. faith is the utter knowledge and certainty that you are a survivor, and that you are only a victim as long as you choose to be. hope tells you that one day you will escape the forces that make you a victim, while faith is the knowledge and understanding that right now, you don't have to be a victim - you are free. you are free to be in control of your life, to live the way you want to live, and most importantly, to be happy. you have it all inside of you. you just have to see it." it just made me stop...and look at what i'm doing w/ myself/my life...and what i can do about it. it's a full on u-turn from where i am now...ever had that feeling? you just suddenly look around you....and wonder how the hell you got to where you are...how you go sooo off track. fair warning, i don't think i ever know what i'm saying. so, i'm s*rry. i'm undergoing a 'makeover' of sorts...i just need to make some changes. i sure do babble alot. ahh...well...you knew it was coming, i'm gonna bail out here. i get myself talking...then i get mucho selfconcious...and i shut up. thanks everyone...for, everything. take care, goodbye. ever as always, Naomi the unknown babbling "okie" angel ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 13 Mar 1999 14:04:52 MST From: "nameless angel" Subject: ET: life has become so complicted Dearest angels I joined this list when it first started yet barely anyone knows me. I must admit I lurk in the shadows reading e-mails only when I get the chance and deleting the rest. I feel like an intruder when I read e-mails because I am not part of the group that has grown from this list. I have always been a bit "jealous" of all of you for your talents, the way you write and express your self. When I read this list was going to shut down I was so sad. I shouldnt be because I always put off getting off this list for some odd reason. I knew I should get off but it always felt good to read your e-mails and know there were other people in the world who cared about problems beyond their looks. I was glad to read the e-mail stating this list wasnt going to shut down I belive it would have been a travisty. SO I am debating with myself on weather I should now stay on this list or remove myslef. I know if I remove myself nothing changes on this list, no one looses anything. Id ask for your opinion but, you guys dont know me. So I am stuck with a problem of some sorts. Well if this does turn out to be my last post I would like to wish you all well. I hope life never lets you guys down because I belive in all of you. SAM I know I dont know you, and you have NO idea who I am but I just want to tell you that your writing inspires me every time I read it I love to read your posts because I know I will always like them. I wish you good luck in life ERIN thank you so much for everything...I know I havent e-mailed you forver but I wound up in the hospital and life got real complicated. I wish you the best. TO THE REST OF THE ANGELS ~ Thanx for giving me courage to share my life and believe in other people in the world...You are all truelly angels.... With Freindship ~Kerry Ekenstam~ ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 13 Mar 1999 20:10:37 -0800 From: Miles and Prystowsky Subject: ET: .. well i am ever glad that this list won't be shut down after all. many thanks to mike (and alan). hehe. right after that nice furious rush of passionate protests, huh? mm...almost feels like earthquake drills! anyway. just my...um, my 7 cents. love sam the ? angel ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 13 Mar 1999 23:21:09 -0500 From: Rachel Subject: ET: ... @~Angels~@, OK, I just feel like writing my thoughts. I might not be good at it but just read and maybe it'll get better....hopefully!!! lol.. I don't know how I managed to do it, but I just shut down again. It's like when you think life is just great and then....I don't know it just isn't. It happens to me a lot. And I have done it again: shut down. You know, the only way it is good is because this is the time in my life where I really check myself out and I do an overview on myself. But, these are the times when I get the most critical and I just say to myself "who do you think you are" and "what do you think your doing". So, that isn't good. These times in my life I just get a door slammed in my face and I can't open it or it gets stuck. I just can't breathe. Things get too overwhelming and people get too questioning and things get too.....Too much!!!! Its like standing in deep water when you don't know how to swim....yeah I know deep water like Jewel's song. And it feels like no one is on my side, its like I am in a tug of war with me against the whole world. So, yeah, its happened again. The only thing that gets me out is my poetry, my songs, my writings, just letting lose. You all really help me too but I don't know about this time. No, I am not gonna' commit suicide (I'm too scared of knives. Just jokin!!!). But, this time I saw someone I didn't need to see. After years of trying to forget I have seen this person again!!!! Horror memories rushed back from when I was 7.......everything just came back and I shut down. I am trying to bail myself out with a straw. Thanx for listening, @~Rachel~@ The Night Angel with Silver Wings and a Golden Harp ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V2 #69 *********************************