From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #207 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Monday, September 21 1998 Volume 01 : Number 207 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: From MrBB to EDAF & EDA Thoughts [ABershaw@aol.com] Re: ET: Delurking [Angeljlb96@aol.com] Re: ET: Delurking ["The Quiet Angel" ] ET: intro [mandabear4@juno.com (Mandabear four)] Re: ET: Delurking ["Kevin Pease" ] Re: ET: From MrBB to EDAF & EDA Thoughts [Angeljlb96@aol.com] Re: ET: Delurking ["Kevin Pease" ] Re: ET: From MrBB to EDAF & EDA Thoughts [Seth Fulmer ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 14:46:12 EDT From: ABershaw@aol.com Subject: ET: From MrBB to EDAF & EDA Thoughts Hi all, Here's a first. I'm sending this to the EDAF people & the EDA-Thoughts list (but not the regular lists) because I think the answers may be forthcoming from you all particularly. (I've never read the EDA-Thoughts list, but I'm told some of the more sincere & thoughtful EDAs hang there.) Here's the situation---Occasionally I get emails from (primarily young) extremely troubled EDAs. These range from people who are unhealthily desperate to meet Jewel to people who are truly suicidal & are convinced that talking to Jewel is the answer. Jewel's website account also gets this type of correspondance & all of us are genuinely concerned, but we are not qualified crisis intervention counselors. While I know some of these emails are cruel pranks, I'm quite sure some are quite serious & in desperate need of help. I know many EDAs have supported each other in times of personal crisis in the past few years. I also know of several suicidal EDAs who've been helped by other EDAs. My question to you all is-- Is it possible for something to be developed specifically to deal appropriately with these situations? Who amongst us is most qualified to help? If nothing else, can you as a group, compile resources so that a person in need of help can find it? This seems like a very worthy endeavor & possibly falls into the catagory of interest among EDAF folks as well as the EDA-Thoughts list. Or am I way off?? I'm not on the EDA-Thoughts list, so please cc me anything constructive you have to say on this (I can forward it to The EDAF people). EDAs helping EDAs in times of crisis. What to do?? MrBB ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 14:59:03 EDT From: Angeljlb96@aol.com Subject: Re: ET: Delurking Um, ya know what? I think I hate you. So you can stop posting now. In a message dated 98-09-21 14:17:22 EDT, you write: << My first gathering was um, over a year ago (after temporarily overcoming my shyness). It was called Chelstock, in honor of EDA Chelsea visiting NYC (from CO) to celebrate her bday. A small gathering called Kinneyfest (a small tour of the city with a Sleater-Kinney performance in the middle) Then there was Bearsville '97 (which I unofficially rename Sexville, and where I first met mystery EDA) NOTE: The two statements within the parenthesis are unrelated. I am virginal and I'd like to stay that way. No, wait, scratch that last half. Jones Beach to see Jewel :o) Tara MacLean in the city (EDAs from everywhere) then Tara again I believe (except with a smaller EDA turnout) A bunch of visits (5 in total, I think) to the Mercury Lounge to hear Steve P, from outside (I'm underage). Java Hut (Steve P) in NJ Food Drive in NJ Bearsville '98 grrr... memory seems to be failing me. But that's enough to keep you entertained (or make you uninterested). >> ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 15:14:52 -0400 From: "The Quiet Angel" Subject: Re: ET: Delurking - -----Original Message----- From: Angeljlb96@aol.com Date: Monday, September 21, 1998 3:01 PM >Um, ya know what? I think I hate you. So you can stop posting now. > *LOL* Wow it took a lot longer than usual. I guess I should be looking out for lead pipes leaping out of dark alleyways now. The Quiet Angel Abel rosarioa@cuny.campus.mci.net Quiet_Abel@hotmail.com ICQ# 13422943 AIM: ShhhAngel "I'm a sensitive man of the 90's sweetheart, who cares for your emotional being an awful lot" --Jewel ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 15:22:15 -0400 From: mandabear4@juno.com (Mandabear four) Subject: ET: intro hey, my name is Mandy and I just joined this list a couple of days ago via intro from beccahusky. I am 15 and I live in Norwich Ct. I go to the Norwich Free Academy (NFA) where I am presently in my second year there. We call them Lowers. there's junior, lower, upper and senior. I know, it's backwards and not normal but my school isn't normal. I love it though. I have great friends and i love all my classes. I am in my first year of Latin which is very fun..my teacher is the best!! My creative writing class is awesome. We are writing sci-fi stories now. We have to think of a topic. It has to start with a "What if" question. It's cool. I love school because I love learning. I'm not a geek like that but I am intrigued by many things. I want to be well rounded in life...it makes things easier. Ya know, Jack of all Trades and Master of None!? something like that. I am 5'7". i have shoulder length honey auburn hair with red streaks in it. Yes, it's all natural. No dye for this girl. I have brown eyes and a clear complexion. My least favorite subject is Math(ew!) I have many friends in various places. I am pretty outgoing. I like email and meeting new people. I listen well to problems others have. I am going to minor in psychology and major in sociology in college. i have 89 days until my 16th birthday (12/20/82) and 91 days until I can get my permit to drive (legally) lol. See, my bday is on a sunday and DMV isn't open on Mondays. that sucks. I love poetry and I love acting. My favorite thing to do is hang out and listen to music. I love all music except rap and jazz. country is awesome!!! My best friend is a guy whom I love beyond words and my boyfriend of one year is also my best friend. Umm..lets see..what else? I don't know. Well, all I can say is write back if ya want. email is my life!! ~Mandabear~ WBS Semper ubi sub ubi _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 15:37:56 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: Re: ET: Delurking >> Abel writes: >*LOL* Wow it took a lot longer than usual. I guess I should be looking out >for lead pipes leaping out of dark alleyways now. Yeah, 'cause Jamie's SO fearsome... Let us all pause and offer a silent prayer that she will not ever feel the need to put the smack down on all of us. :) "And when you step with your anger, I'm like the robot from Lost In Space - 'Danger!!'..." Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve, I have a history of taking off my shirt..." ---(Barenaked Ladies, "One Week")--- ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 15:44:53 EDT From: Angeljlb96@aol.com Subject: Re: ET: From MrBB to EDAF & EDA Thoughts In a message dated 98-09-21 14:49:47 EDT, you write: << My question to you all is-- Is it possible for something to be developed specifically to deal appropriately with these situations? Who amongst us is most qualified to help? If nothing else, can you as a group, compile resources so that a person in need of help can find it? >> Okay, in my attempt to help, I made a webpage we could send the EDAs, too Fading Away If you want to help...I would like you all to go see it, then get back to me. Also, any thoughts or comments on the idea are highly appreciated. I may not be the most qualified person to do this, but I have had my experiences, I love to help out, and I'm usually pretty okay with it. Anyone else who wants to help out, just let me know. Thanks, Jamie ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 15:49:13 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: Re: ET: Delurking >> Abel writes: >Um... many. They were fun? AAAAAHHHHHH! :) Okay, I was hoping for a response that was a bit more wordy. :) >I can see you guys want content. Something I'm not good at delivering. But >I'll give it the ol' college try. Okay, now the content below was plenty good. :) I, unfortunately, have missed every gathering to come down the pike, despite the fact that I live about 4 hours from Bearsville, and could easily make a weekend trip to the NYC area for some of the gatherings in that area. I guess I've just never gotten up the ambition to try to make it to one. >Then there was Bearsville '97 (which I unofficially rename Sexville, and Sexville? And I missed it... [sigh] The biggest chunk of free love to occur in my lifetime, and I miss it. :) I did make it to a Jewel concert at the Hampton Beach Casino Ballroom in NH back in... August of 96, maybe? That doesn't quite sound right... I know it was during the summer, because I was wearing shorts & sandals... and it occurred during SOME year, but I don't remember if it was 96 or not - Eleanor McEvoy opened the show... I dragged a couple friends, who sat there, going, "Dammit, when can we leave?" Bunch of wimps. :) I'm pretty sure there was at least a semi-gathering there, but I missed out on that, too. :) The show was great, but my friends... well... let's just say I was wishing I had horse tranquilizers with me by the end of the show. :) >grrr... memory seems to be failing me. But that's enough to keep you >entertained (or make you uninterested). Keep it up, we're entertained. If nothing else you'll annoy Jamie with your tales of all the gatherings... and that alone is worth the entertainment value. :) Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve, I have a history of taking off my shirt..." ---(Barenaked Ladies, "One Week")--- ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 16:14:16 -0400 (EDT) From: Seth Fulmer Subject: Re: ET: From MrBB to EDAF & EDA Thoughts Ok, I've thought about this quite a while and I think the only thing I can think of is...and if this is inconsiderate, let me know...don't yell me know :)) I've never been in this situation, so I dunno how others would feel. If possible, Mr. Bibi asks Jewel to draw up a sort of form letter/email to send to the person explaining how busy her schedule is and that she wouldn't be able to honor their request for a visit.. My logic to this is...think about how some people react when they ask to use someone else's possessions and you have to tell them they can't. They won't accept that until that person tells them it. It's happened to me many times(and I've gotten yelled at as well...I can tell a story if wanted). Well, if someone else other than Jewel tells them the "bad news", they're more likely to accept it. Not that they will believe it(I know I would be cynical at first), but it's a suggestion :) Let me know what you think. I'd like to help :) Seth D. Fulmer mailto:kaosking@voicenet.com ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 16:22:31 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: Re: ET: From MrBB to EDAF & EDA Thoughts >> Jamie writes: >Okay, in my attempt to help, I made a webpage we could send the EDAs, too >[...] If you want to help...I would like you all to go see it, then get back to me. >Also, any thoughts or comments on the idea are highly appreciated. I may not >be the most qualified person to do this, but I have had my experiences, I love >to help out, and I'm usually pretty okay with it. Anyone else who wants to >help out, just let me know. Man, you're way ahead of me. :) I just suggested to Alan that we set up a web page where info could be posted, and if the people wanted, they could get info & maybe write some email to people there. Good call. :) It looks good, the only thing I would suggest putting on the page might be some sort of "confidentiality guarantee" - even though I'm sure nobody who's willing to help would consider treating the conversations in a *non* confidential manner, it might be a little more reassuring to anybody seeking help if something was put up on the web page that reminded them that any email they send would be considered confidential, and private. I think there's some definite potential to this idea of a 'help center' type of thing... if we're going to ask for volunteers to talk with people & help them, though, I think it might be a good idea to get some information on the "how-to's" of counseling, so that everybody who's helping has at least some sort of idea of what's up. Ideally... we'd find we have some people who have experience with this sort of thing on the list... but if not, we should make sure the volunteers have some information about what they're expected to do. Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve, I have a history of taking off my shirt..." ---(Barenaked Ladies, "One Week")--- ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 16:36:46 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: Re: ET: From MrBB to EDAF & EDA Thoughts >> Seth Fulmer writes: >If possible, Mr. Bibi asks Jewel to draw up a sort of form letter/email to >send to the person explaining how busy her schedule is and that she >wouldn't be able to honor their request for a visit.. Unfortunately, I don't think this is going to do the trick... if the only thing these people are holding onto is "if I could only meet Jewel, it would be okay..." and then they're told, "Sorry, Jewel doesn't have time for you...", that could just as easily push them over the edge. Don't forget... people who are suicidal are in a very fragile, delicate emotional state, and it doesn't take a whole lot to push them into doing something rash. To be told with a form letter that the only thing they've got fixed in their mind as being able to make everything okay isn't going to be able to happen, well... I'm sure you can figure out how distressing that could be to someone. >Well, if someone else other than Jewel tells them the "bad news", >they're more likely to accept it. Not that they will believe it(I know I >would be cynical at first), but it's a suggestion :) Let me know what >you think. I'd like to help :) I think the idea with this program is for EDA's to step up and help other people in distress... a form letter response probably isn't going to do too much to solve the problem - it requires time & patienceto truly help someone who's suicidal, and for that, I think we'd need real people behind the email to truly help. Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve, I have a history of taking off my shirt..." ---(Barenaked Ladies, "One Week")--- ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 21 Sep 1998 16:37:41 -0400 From: "O'Neill" Subject: ET: Delurker number.... Hey all! I guess I need to introduce myself, don't I? I hate doing this... Anywayz, my name's Natasha, though everyday the number of people who call me that decrease. I have people calling me Anna (it's my middle name), Tasha, Tash, Nashville, Tashy, and more. It gets kind of confusing sometimes... My God, I sound like an idiot. And I'm talking like my best friend.... Hey, don't worry, I luv these little dots, too... I'll nominate myself for youngest (13, fourteen in March) member. If there are anyother "youngns" out there, give me shout... Sctrach that, anyone who wants to chat, e-mail me. I love to talk and normally, when I'm not talking about myself, you'll find I am quite human. (Though there are quite a few that'll beg to differ on that part.) I've been on this list for... Um, I'm not sure how long- I'd have to check with Lara how long it's been around. I've been here since day one. Speaking of which; Lara, this list is awesome!!! I joined it 'cause I thought it'd be nice to get someother EDAs. I never expected a lot of Jewel Content, and I wouldn't change this list no matter what! Over the past few days we've really gotten back into our grove- more e-mails than I've bothered to count. *smiles* Though I've lurked, I've always been a faithful reader... And now I sound like a freak... Anywayz, it's nice to see all the people de-lurkering, plus posts from all the regulars... Sorry I can't even begin to name you all. I know there's Jamie, Sam (where is she, anyhow? Camp or whatever?), Jon, and more. I live in a teensy-tiny little town in Ontario, Canada. Apparently, there's a population of 73,000, though I could swear it includes the cows, horses, and corn. I mean, how many people have actually heard of Sarnia? I got to a stupid public school that goes from jr. kindgergartion all the way up through grade eight and only has about 400 students.... And a few stupid teachers. I've lived all over, though it doesn't matter. I have only five years till I get out of here, so what does it matter? *smiles* I love Jewel and Sarah's music (I like a lot of other singers, too), reading, writing (letters, stories, whatever...Except poetry- I've only written one poem in my life. If anyone actually wants to hear it, ask, but it's terrible.), singing, sailing, camping, and more. My favourite subjects are normally math and science, but my teacher this year does basically none of either. So, I spend quite a lot of my class time looking out the window and contemplating how I'll live for the next five years of my life... I hate French, though only because I'm two years behind everyone in my class (I lived in the States for grade five and six).... I guess I've said enough for now. I hope to continue to post, though. For those with ICQ, e-mail me with your number's -I can't remember mine- and we can chat. Well, y'all have a good evening now... ~Natasha~ "Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same." ~ Unknown "The big moments are going to come, you can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are." ~ Whistler, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Becoming Part II "I wish the real world would just stop hassling me" ~ "Real World", MatchBox 20 (Could someone send me the full lyrics to that?) "It takes a lot of understanding, time, and trust to gain a close friendship with someone." "The sun is always shining somewhere- you just have to know where to find it." "Some friends are forever, and if you find such a friend, you feel happy and complete. Because you need not worry, you have a forever friend for life, and forever has no end." Okay, okay, I'll stop! I do have pages, and pages more though and always want more.... ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V1 #207 **********************************