From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #126 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Wednesday, August 19 1998 Volume 01 : Number 126 Today's Subjects: ----------------- Re: ET: me again [Summer Burton ] Re: ET: Re: Everything that is me ["Kevin Pease" ] Re: ET: Re: Re: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #122 [Summer Burton ] ET: Re: "perfect" ["Kevin Pease" ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1998 23:43:47 -0500 From: Summer Burton Subject: Re: ET: me again Us wrote: > me again > sm august 18 1998 Great poem, it really paints a mental image and it's just plain well written. I'm obsessed with this me-thing - I have ANOTHER one.. Favorites. my favorite color's changed since before I used to like yellow, then pink and more and then I said green cause everyone did and it seemed like the enviormental thing to say and then I said "green and blue" so I could answer like Jonathan Taylor Thomas (I was younger, y'know) now it's this deep dark emerald green that reminds me of my dream vehicle - an old pickup parked down the street and reminds me of the eyes of the boy who haunts me in my sleep And my favorite movie is Lady And The Tramp cause I'm a romantic and I like Disney - oh-so-contrary to my feminist-unschooler-hippie friends And my favorite book is either Weetzie Bat some contemparary, ever-cool, silly fairy fiction or Anne Of Green Gables the delightful beautiful calssic girl's tale or The Catcher In The Rye what someone "like me" is supposed to answer And my favorite person is that dream boy (see above) And my favorite drink is a watermelonp-strawberrie smoothie And my favorit poet is Pablo Neruda, who write words so beautiful it makes me cry or something like that. And my favorite dream is the one where the dream comes true. ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1998 00:41:09 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: Re: ET: Re: Everything that is me >>Seth D. Fulmer writes: >My basic point is that you can look at your goodness all you want. If >nobody else sees it, it's not going to do one bit of good. Why won't it do one bit of good? As an example: if I'm building something, I'm going to do the best job I can possible do on all parts of that job - which means, the right materials, the proper planning, and the proper execution of the plan. I don't care if nobody ever sees the workmanship I'm doing, because *I* know it's there. This is something I learned from my dad when I used to help him doing stuff around the house - if you're going to do the job, you do it right. I'd ask him, "Why not just cut this corner? Nobody's ever going to see it?" His response - "Because I'll know it's there." It seemed strange, and almost ass-backwards, at the time, but now I've come to appreciate that way of thinking. What I mean is, why can't I (or someone else) take pride in the fact that I do something well, even if nobody else ever knows I can do it? My sense of self worth isn't derived as a function of the praise I get from other people. Yes, nobody may ever see it, but *I* know it's there, and I know what I'm made of. I don't need everybody to pat me on the back and say, "Good job." Yes, that's nice, but it's not really my reason for getting up in the morning. >I look at myself as other >people see me because it's impossible to make other people >view you as you view yourself. If you disagree with me, try to convince me >of your image of yourself. I can guarantee that it will not work(and I'm >not trying to be mean...I'm just saying that nobody will be convinced of >something they don't want to be convinced of.). I don't think you do look at yourself the way they see you. Maybe you look at yourself the way you *think* other people see you, but that's an entirely different thing. You can only truthfully look at yourself through your own eyes - you can't know how other people view you, truly, and when you make assumptions about how other people see you, you're probably totally misinterpreting their image of you. >The fact that other people >have a better life than me, proves that it is possible to have that sort of >life. It may not be probable from where I am, but I sure as h&#@ am going >to try. How do you know they have a better life than you? Because they have prettier clothes, or nicer hair, or straighter teeth? I bet if you asked any one of those "beautiful people" (to borrow a phrase from Marilyn Manson... :) if they were satisfied with their lives, they'd probably be able to list 50 things they don't like about their life. You've got one life - why try to make it into somebody else's, and why live for how you think other people see you? Do your own thing, and kick ass doing it... let the other people worry about their own things. >As for showing what I'm good at...I am best at being "not >found"(seriously...I try at it), writing poetry, and compositions that make >the sky cry, and copying others effortlessly. Not exactly noticeable >abilities, are they? This is what I don't get. Why do your abilities have to be noticeable to other people? And, really, for that matter... writing good poetry & good compositions are very noticeable skills - ever hear the name Shakespeare? Neruda (I'm sure everybody here has heard that name... (thanks, Jamie!) :)? Dickinson? Byron? Plath? Angelou? They're all pretty well-known (and very noticed), and how did they get there? Writing poetry, and compositions. If world-wide & lasting fame isn't "noticeable" enough for you, I don't know what is. :) Copying others? Ever turn on Saturday Night Live and watch some of their skits? Looks to me like people (Phil Hartman? Dana Carvey? There's two...) have been doing pretty good jobs of copying people's voices & mannerisms, and getting pretty well known as a result. :) I think you're trying too hard to convince me you're worthless here... >Primarily, when I see their imperfections, I can attack the person >right there. If the person isn't having a good relationship with their >parents, that would be an imperfection in their lives and it would also be >a good place to attack them. This statement, quite frankly, appalls me. Enough said. I'm not going to go any deeper there, and I'd like to pretend those four lines weren't there. >Not that I would do that without due reason, >but frankly speaking, you just can't use someone's bright points to help or >hurt them and like I said earlier... You don't think that noticing somebody's bright points can really make their day? My sister had a bout with clinical depression a couple years ago... She's since evened things out, and is doing well... but I was talking with her about it afterwards, and she was saying that even the slightest things could set her off one way or the other... something that we'd consider minor said in an offhand way could make her have a horrible day, or a wonderful day. Ever see a kid smile when you tell them they look handsome, or pretty, or that their drawing is very pretty, or anything else like that? Ever see a kid's face crumble when you tell them something negative? And you still maintain that a compliment or a negative comment can't help or hurt someone? From a standpoint of confidence alone, that can make a big difference. >seeing your own good points won't help or hurt either. Again, how so? If I know what my good points are, it's also a safe bet that I know my limitations and capabilities.... knowing yourself well will never hurt you... and if you know your own good points, then you will be more confident about everything you go into, because you know what you can accomplish in any given situation. You can also arrange to play to your good points (Engineer's Principle #1: Coincidentally, the correct solution for any problem is also the solution you happen to know best. :), which will certainly help. Self-awareness is *never* a bad thing. Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "I feel like a quote out of context, withholding the rest, So I can be for you what you want to see; I got the gestures, sounds, I got the timing down, It's uncanny, yeah you'd think it was me; Do you think I should take a class to lose my southern accent? Did I make me up, or make a face 'til it stuck? I do the best imitation of myself..." -----(Ben Folds Five)----- ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1998 00:54:09 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: ET: Re: Re: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #122 >> Us writes: >>enough..."I look anorexic...I look like Fiona Apple" Granted, people still >>think she's gorgeous, but everyone comments on how she's too skinny. >Fiona is way disgusting imho. I love her voice and that, dear angels, is >all. :) Cept she DOES have some mighty cool things bout her personality, >heh heh..... Hey, I'll go even farther - not only do I think Fiona looks like a way-skinny 14 year old (no offense to any 14 year olds that may be out there... :) her voice can get pretty tiring after a while, too... When I see (or hear) her, I want to sit her down, make her eat a big meal of chicken or beef and a bunch of pasta (the more calories the better for her... :), and tell her "CHEER UP, ferchrissake." :) I have to be VERY very moody for her music to really appeal to me. Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "I feel like a quote out of context, withholding the rest, So I can be for you what you want to see; I got the gestures, sounds, I got the timing down, It's uncanny, yeah you'd think it was me; Do you think I should take a class to lose my southern accent? Did I make me up, or make a face 'til it stuck? I do the best imitation of myself..." -----(Ben Folds Five)----- ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1998 01:08:47 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: ET: Re: continued >> Us writes: >KEVIN: >no I'm not shoutin, just sayin yer name. :-P :P yourself. Getting me all excited, thinking somebody was so excited by something I wrote that they just had to yell! >You know I happen to agree with you here. On one hand, young people >frequently ARE more, uh, stricken. [...] So while we wittle-agers do >often truly believe these mean things about ourselves, sometimes it gets, >uh, exaggerated. [...] Believe me, I know. I was there, and as I said, I think a change in attitude does come with a little more perspective & a little bit of aging & maturity... Just wish I could pass on what I know now, but I think it's one of those things that everybody just has to sort of see for themselves. :) >You are so totally right. :) Ah, that is just sweet sweet music. Who says you can't have it all? :) I just want it known, I DID NOT PAY HER TO SAY THAT. :) >You're right again..... This just gets better and better. I'm beside myself with joy. :) >Yupyup.....Though we're always hoping in the back of our minds, to hear, >"oh but you're NOT plain darling! You're simply ravishing!" =P Oh my! The absolute funniest, but looking back, probably also the cruelest, thing I have *ever* heard anybody say about something like this goes a little something like this: My friend (Girl)* was talking to my friend (Guy)*. He's about four years older than her, but she has a serious crush on him. He says something to her like, "Well, you know, maybe if you were cuter, I'd consider it." She says back, "But (Guy), my mom always tells me I'm beautiful. Why can't you see that?" His response: "But (Girl), don't you realize, your mom HAS to tell you you're beautiful. My mom always told me I was handsome. Look at me now - she was obviously full of crap." (*Names have been changed to protect the innocent. :) Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.ne t (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "I feel like a quote out of context, withholding the rest, So I can be for you what you want to see; I got the gestures, sounds, I got the timing down, It's uncanny, yeah you'd think it was me; Do you think I should take a class to lose my southern accent? Did I make me up, or make a face 'til it stuck? I do the best imitation of myself..." -----(Ben Folds Five)----- ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1998 00:23:26 -0500 From: Summer Burton Subject: Re: ET: Re: Re: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #122 On this Fiona Apple/weight bit: I have a comment that most people I know laugh at, but I think it's a valid concern, although not mine PERSONALLY cause I'm not skinny like dat. Anwyay, i have some naturally super-thin friends who eat and exercise perfectly healthily, but are still majorly-skinny and even bony - far from everyone being like "yea, way to go", they all get random people saying "Are you anorexic", pals of one girl's boyfrend always ask him if he's fed her lately and a lot of people reject them because of that. Just because someone is skinny does not mean they're sick, anorexic or a weight-freak. - -Summer - -- Lelaina: 'Troy, aren't you excited?' Troy: 'I'm bursting with fruit flavor.' - -Reality Bites ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1998 00:40:36 -0500 From: "Mike Gilmore" Subject: ET: lot o' stuff mostly Re:'s Hi all, First, I'll bore everyone with my contribution to the 'me' thread, then anyone who hasn't been scared off can read my replies to other messages. About me-- I'm so ordinary looking that I can fade into the walls- people literally don't know I'm in a room unless I do something to call attention to myself. If you want to know what I look like, picture the skinny buck-toothed geek with glasses--yeah, that one. Now, picture him 19. You got it. I believe that the secrets of the universe can be found in humor, and anyone who wants to know my philosophies about life can find them all by splicing together the Discworld novels, just about everything by R. A. Heinlein, and Robert Asprin's Myth books. The answer is 42. :) I am an active member of the Camarilla, where I play characters who can do all the things I'd like to, but who don't want to, which can get very frustrating during OOC moments. My life revolves primarily around my true love, Hyun Mi, who is the most beautiful woman in though world, even though she says she is too short to be beautiful, and that she has fat arms. That aside, now come the Re:'s. They are pretty much random, and Internet Exploder won't let me quote any of the original posts, so these will probably appear to jump around a lot. A side note-does anyone on the list know how to disable that stupid thingy in Internet Exploder that won't let me download Netscape? On the perfect pet-get a cat. The best way to get one is to find a stray that lives near your house and convince it to adopt you. On how I see other's\how they see me- When I first meet/see a person, they get their very own box-in-my-mind (tm) which starts out empty and gets filled up with all the stuff I learn about them. The first thing to go in is always what I call the person's 'aura'. It's NOT an aura in the mystical sense, but rather a combination of all the little things about people that I almost never take notice of consiously, but that I see anyway. The things that make up this aura range from the very obvious, like the way a person stands and walks, to the very subtle, such as what kind of calouses are on their hands.--are they the thick, hard calouses of someonoe who does a lot of hard physical labor, or the lighter, thinner calouses from hours spent holding a pen, or playing the piano? I really don't give a crap what society or anyone else thinks about me, (except for Hyun Mi, of course) and I never have. About the only reason any of you would care about this is because it might help you to know why I have a hard time understanding all the post about the pressures of society making people decide whether or not they're too fat, too thin, or just plain too ugly. For me, these are all parts of a your personality, and have nothing at all to do with how you look. Ack!--It's past midnight! Did I mention that I also have absolutely no sense of the passage of time? Oh well, I'll send this off anyway, and hopefully it will make snese when I wake up in the morning. Palantir the Trekker Angel 0:P Brain on vacation, call back later ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1998 01:39:15 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: ET: Re: "perfect" >> Us writes: >I was just thinking, who and what really DEFINES what perfect is anyway? Okay, hopefully this will be my last post for the evening. Dammit, some of us have to work in the morning. :) Sam, I think you've hit on a very key point here - perfection is, at least to imperfect creatures, a totally subjective thing - you can't know perfection if you've never known anything but imperfection. Ask a man who's been blind from birth to describe the color green. Ask a person who's been deaf from birth to describe music to you. You can have ideals of perfection, but if you ask 30 different people what "perfection" is, they'll give you 30 different answers. There is no universal definition to "perfect". >How is blonde hair more perfect than brown? Well, I hope it's not... I've always favored brown hair over blonde or red, anyway. Just another way perfection is subjective, I guess. Or, maybe I'm wrong, and I've been looking at the wrong hair color all along? :) >Does a girl have to be a 36C to meet the standards of perfect? Actually, according to the last survey I heard that was done, a 36c would make said girl exactly average. If we're defining "average" as perfect, then I'd say we're all pretty much there already. (Okay, maybe bra sizes are a bad example, at least for the guys... :) >How come blue eyes are better than brown, and green better than blue? And again, I hope they're not better. I've always preferred brown. I guess I'm just ALL screwed up with this eye color & hair color thing. I wish someone had told me. :) >Do you have to look like a freakin' swimsuit model to be perfect? It never hurts when you're trying to get a date, but anybody here ever watch the Daily Show, or the Howard Stern show (on E!) and see what happens when they attempt to test swimsuit models, or the Playboy models that come on? 1 out of 5 questions correct is Kathy Ireland's record on the Daily Show; I've also seen various Playboy models on the Howard Stern show, and when he tries to test them, most of the time, they giggle, shrug, and go, "I don't know." While the idea of taking Kathy Ireland or some girl from Playboy out on the town is neat, I don't think I know enough about nail polish and lingerie to really be able to carry on a conversation with them. So, I guess the perfect girl for me would have brown hair & eyes, and be able to carry on a reasonably intelligent conversation for more than 10 minutes. Swimsuit model? Well, it wouldn't hurt if she was that, too. But from the limited amount I've seen of swimsuit models, let's just say that I wouldn't expect the elevator to run all the way to the top; I wouldn't expect to see 52 cards in the deck; I would expect 2 sandwiches shy of a picnic; You get the drift. :) To me, I'd much rather have a reasonably intelligent girl with an average build than a blow up doll with a voice. :) >It all depends what your perspective is. Exactly. Well said. :) - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "I feel like a quote out of context, withholding the rest, So I can be for you what you want to see; I got the gestures, sounds, I got the timing down, It's uncanny, yeah you'd think it was me; Do you think I should take a class to lose my southern accent? Did I make me up, or make a face 'til it stuck? I do the best imitation of myself..." -----(Ben Folds Five)----- ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V1 #126 **********************************