From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #83 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Friday, July 17 1998 Volume 01 : Number 083 Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: today [moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us)] ET: Dr. RomeAntic, Jamie, etc. [moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us)] Re: ET: good will hunting [moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us)] ET: ~*~ [moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us)] ET: again [moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us)] Re: ET: good will hunting ["Kevin B. Pease" ] ET: good will hunting update :) [karagarbe ] ET: blossom [karagarbe ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Wed, 15 Jul 1998 22:00:01 -0700 From: moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us) Subject: ET: today Sup angulz! Lemme tell you something just cause I feel like telling it. Today coming back from dance, I dunno, what the hell is up with guys in their 20s making me feel totally weird in front of my FAMILY! Lately it's like, "old men look" year. Ugh. So this guy in a red pickup truck was stopped at the light beside us, like a little in front of us, and he like leaned OUT of his truck and looked (way so obvious) at me the entire light. (What am I supposed to do, stare back at a strange freak at NIGHT? Gawd....) Then the light turned green and he went into the far right lane and we went into the left, and lo and behold, yippie! We get stopped again at the same light, where he does the same thing, and then makes his right-hand turn and looks back again (what an idiot, looking back while he's driving). So we get home and it just so happens that the Elementary kids (12 year olds on my street who would love to pick on my brother but they know his big sister would kick their ass) are out pretending to skateboard with the new teenage guy who lives across the street with the other teenage guys. I'm like, great. That guy is out and it's night and I'm in dance clothes so I can't like go out there, plus I have like this history of giving those little Elementary kids dirty looks so I can't just go up and converse with them NOW. So we pull into the garage and I'm about to get out, and who walks by my house at that moment but an Elementary kid?! (My mother once said, "oh I bet they think you're so pretty honey" which I could have murdered her for because it has positively spoiled like the rest of my out-front life.) So I'm like, oh my, again, cause I'm not gonna go parading in my brightly-lit garage in plain sight of this moron in dance clothes. So I like walked around the crowded side of the car and slam-closed the garage. There's my stupid story. But, the moral of the story is yet to come! I hate it when OLD MEN or ELEMENTARY kids look out their cars at me and then my mother looks over and sees them and I could like die. (Iz only ok for teenage guys but not around my MOTHER for god's sake!) This one time, this huge group of teenage guys were screaming and yelling at this light and it wasn't till my dear sweet mother pointed it out that I actually figured out WHY they were doing this (but I was only like 12 then, okay). It's totally annoying in front of family. Friends? Okay, I can handle that. But not around my mother! Enough enough. I just had to share that. I have no more poems yet so just enjoy hearing about my life. Which reminds me. How DO I talk to this guy across the street? Knowing that I'm not exactly best friends with the kids he's teaching to skateboard, and knowing the fact that, in this neighborhood, people hide in their homes unless they're going somewhere so it's awkward to just STAND out there, how on earth do I start to get to know this guy? I'm not gonna go up to his freakin' DOOR here. Sam the ? angel "I wish the real world would just stop hassling me" ~Matchbox 20~ moonsong@ix.netcom.com ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 16 Jul 1998 10:30:45 -0700 From: moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us) Subject: ET: Dr. RomeAntic, Jamie, etc. Hey angulz, Doc Rome! That poem "Call Me Winter" was EXCELLENT. We want more of those. :) (Sound familiar?) It was really wonderful. I liked "Lace" too. Wow. Jamie, I love yer song "Surrender"! ><< Hi James though I'm not supposed to want to say hi>> > >You two! stop! Awwww, why?! You don't even know. :) Heh heh. >to hear it...you are more than welcome to just let everything out on me, dear. Okie dokie artichokie. Well if you all really want to know, that so-called friend? I still detest her. Blue and red paint, Sam the ? angel "I'm the king of the castle and you're the dirty rascal...crash into me baby" ~Dave Matthews Band~ moonsong@ix.netcom.com ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 16 Jul 1998 10:30:39 -0700 From: moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us) Subject: Re: ET: good will hunting Kara, >moment, I think that I'd be happy without the college degree, Then go ahead. Kara you have got to follow your dreams. If you're terribly unhappy being away from him, then go back to him. You can always go back to college at a later time in your life, there's no rush to do it now. You have to do what's right for YOU, and right now it doesn't sound like being "the good little girl" and going to college and living away from the guy you love is what your heart wants. You have to live your life for yourself, not for everyone else. If you live for them, you're not really living. And what's the use in being unhappy? If your parents love you, they will respect your decision. Sure, they'll be upset, especially if they're like my grandparents (motto: "no Ph.D. or MD? You've insulted us"). However they should get over it. >i've spent my whole life trying to be good for them, And now you have to live your life trying to be good to YOURSELF. Don't do things for your parents. It will only make you miserable. >he is my future... i am actually happy, truly happy, when i'm with >him. Girl! Take your things and go! Go where your heart leads you. There is no better time than to do it now. If he is who and what makes you happy, surely that's a sign. >is there any reason for me not to be with him? Not if you truly want to be with him. Go for it. Luv ya, Sam the ? angel moonsong@ix.netcom.com ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 16 Jul 1998 10:55:02 -0700 From: moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us) Subject: ET: ~*~ Hola angels, Ummm yup. I just drank an entire glass of chocolate milk. Heeeee. Sounds kiddish, but that was really good. It's so hot today. My mother's like, "drink milk or take calcium" and I'm like, no I'm not swallowing pills if I don't have to, thank you very much. Sam the ? angel ~Drinking mercury to the mystery, Of all that you should ever leave behind In time~ Ava Adore by SP she sprays her hair and brushes it back and before she knows blue is upon her the day has yet to start its course and begin the heat and the life a ponytail in schoolgirl innocence and drawstring shorts claim just the opposite a mix of her worlds combined in her eyes she displays them like a bucket of paint that she spreads and paints out over the sky with angel wings sm july 16 1998 moonsong@ix.netcom.com ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 16 Jul 1998 11:06:43 -0700 From: moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us) Subject: ET: again Angelic poets, Here I go again....Forgive? now is the time so no point in wasting pick the flower that curves up toward you its sun with a long reaching stem awaiting your decision take a deep breath a clean breath of your life's air and move foward toward the light that you know has been calling you it is a door that you now need to open it is a doorway that you should not fear to cross for you know you have been waiting and now is the time smile, it makes you glow brilliantly you will shine in the light of that which leads you it lures you like a soft gentle glow and pulls you with a sweet heavenly lilac scent of spring you know it is time do not be afraid your life is just beginning sm july 16 1998 deticated to a friend (you know who you are) "heavenly wine and roses seem to whisper to me when you smile" moonsong@ix.netcom.com ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 16 Jul 1998 14:58:54 -0400 From: "Kevin B. Pease" Subject: Re: ET: good will hunting >>Us writes: >Then go ahead. Kara you have got to follow your dreams. If you're >terribly unhappy being away from him, then go back to him. You can always >go back to college at a later time in your life, there's no rush to do it >now. You have to do what's right for YOU, and right now it doesn't sound >like being "the good little girl" and going to college and living away from >the guy you love is what your heart wants. You have to live your life for >yourself, not for everyone else. If you live for them, you're not really >living. And what's the use in being unhappy? I just wanted to chime in and add a couple thoughts here. I almost totally agree with Sam here, but there's two things I think should be mentioned: First, there's always the option of transferring to a school nearer to home (or nearer to him? Not sure of the exact logistics of Kara's situation. Is school & family on east coast, guy on west? or is it just school on the east coast?). This would make you and him happy, and also keep your folks at least marginally happy. Then it wouldn't be "I'm dropping out of school", it would be "I'm transferring to a different school." Just a thought. True, you could always go back, but it becomes harder and harder to go back as bills accumulate and stuff you need to do seems to get more and more urgent. Second, make sure you don't just up and drop out without giving some serious consideration to your own future. It is possible (I've seen it happen with a friend of mine, so I'm not just smoking crack here... :) that you will eventually end up resenting this guy, if you give up college and a degree altogether, and move to be with him. Consider how important getting that degree is to you, in addition to how important this guy is... if the degree is important to you, then it is entirely possible that you will end up resenting this guy because you gave that up for him. Like I said, I've seen it happen with a friend of mine... his girlfriend was going to school, he's in the military... he got shipped out halfway across the country, she said, "I want to come with you", and dropped out of school. About 6 months later, she blew up at him, broke up with him, and moved back home. They've since talked, and at least sort of mellowed towards each other, and she says the biggest reason she blew up and broke up with him was because she "felt like she had to" drop out of school, and later decided it wasn't exactly the way she wanted to do it. Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "Well if I were an angel, I could fly over Jordan, and I wouldn't need no Greyhound to save my soul, but maybe that's a good thing, 'cause I'll be home before I know it, And if I was an angel, I'd have a long way to go..." --(Matraca Berg)-- ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 16 Jul 1998 14:18:16 PDT From: "* Jewel *" Subject: ET: 2 small poems.... *~Thorny Heart~* Bind me to His Thorny heart And I shall not be pricked, But merely scratched, Soothing the scars With wholesome kisses. *~Untitled 7-16-98~* Thoughts drip from my pen Onto swollen pages, Full of tarnished love, Electric lust, And fresh scars. This notebook, Stained with late night memories And scattered aspirations, Is my heart's Only honest homage, Held sacred, And kept, From all who think they know Me. ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 16 Jul 1998 18:27:18 -0400 (Eastern Daylight Time) From: karagarbe Subject: ET: good will hunting update :) Hi angels, Thanks to everyone who read or responded to my "good will hunting" post, and I'm going to reply to all of you who wrote me individually, just please forgive me for being slow at email! For those of you who followed my story, I've been giving it a lot of thought, and also thinking about the many things that all of you have been saying... I think education is important, and if I stay at my school then I can graduate early (in 3 years total instead of 4), so it would be worth it to do that if I can have the strength to stay here. So for now we're discussing our options, but going to see how this coming semester goes... if things get too bad, then we'll talk about one of us transferring. I know he'll support me if I think that I need to stay here... and I don't think I'm in any danger of losing him altogether. Love is the most important thing, I firmly believe that, and I would sacrifice my education if I felt that that's what it took to have him... but if we think that we can survive apart, then we probably will, because looking at the big picture, that's for the best, both financially (we're each paying instate tuition rates at our respective schools) and academically, because usually in transferring schools some of the credits don't transfer equally, and we might have to spend extra semesters in school. I know that I'll move to be with him after my graduation, and it's better to wait until then to do so if i can, because then I can get a full time job and live a stable life with him. Thanks again to everyone who sent me replies to that. And just a reminder to everyone... don't give up on love, because it's the most powerful, cleansing force in the world. If you have a chance at that, any chance, go for it. Yes, long distance internet relationships can work... so can any other kind of relationship... if you love someone, you can do anything. Don't miss out on the chance for love. Don't look back years from now with regret, thinking, "If only I'd told him how I felt... what if..." Go for it. Follow your heart. And if you need help, I and the other everyday angels will be here to share our advice and our experiences, just like all of you have been for me. Thanks again guys. You really are angels. o:-) Love, Kara "She said - She said You are possessed with a power Bigger than the pain" - Everclear "Heartspark Dollarsign" _____________________________________________________ "If you could give people one message, what would it be?" "Love." --Ed Kowalczyk, lead singer of Live ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 16 Jul 1998 23:04:24 -0400 (Eastern Daylight Time) From: karagarbe Subject: ET: blossom I was writing to Kristen earlier about some of her poems (that I really loved!), and some images formed in my mind that I thought suited my own situation. I wrote this about the love of my life, 2500 miles away... Oh, and Sam, I loved your poem today, the carpe diem theme of it... especially the lines "it lures you /like a soft gentle glow /and pulls you /with a sweet /heavenly lilac /scent of spring" enough blabbing, here's one from me. 7-16-98 blossom your words like little warm fires keep me alive through a year of winters they feed my dreams, held closely the secret blossoms of my inner heart shielding my hopes lest they be exposed to daylight and shrivel away at another's eyes upon them stay with me, stay by me until my dreams gain strength and can bloom from the darkness into reality. _____________________________________________________ "If you could give people one message, what would it be?" "Love." --Ed Kowalczyk, lead singer of Live ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V1 #83 *********************************