From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #42 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Monday, June 1 1998 Volume 01 : Number 042 Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: poetry ["* Jewel *" ] ET: 4 poems written late at night [Jan Winters ] ET: hey guys ["Christie Ambert" ] ET: hey [moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us)] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 23:06:01 PDT From: "* Jewel *" Subject: ET: poetry Hi guys! Well, heres a poem I had to write for my english project. It was sorta a last min. thing and its 'not' about me :) Untitled - -------- Do you remember When we'd ramble on for hours? You'd tickle my heart, Quench my sorrows, And sew up my past. You'd throw-up soft words of comfort Until I'd shrivel, And give in But I would strangle your heart, And tighten the knots, Unfolding my true substance. I am a thread that dangles for attention, Tantalizing my lover, And soiling our hearts. Heres another one. Its sorta blunt. Calling Craig 5/25/98 - --------------------- What, Oh God, What! Did I ever see in you? A little fling- A meaningless screw. You are a sliver, Gauged deep within my flesh, Why did I call again? I couldn't let the past rest! Old memories are brought back So shockingly quick- Why didn't I see That you're just a stupid prick? Well, thats all for now. Talk to you angelz L8er! O:) Love Always, *~Kristen~* "Love is so short, Forgetting is so long..." ~PaBlO nErUda ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ICQ UIN #: 2838979 AOL Instant Messenger: jeweljk15 Yahoo Pager: Jewel4Evr Email: Kristenluv@hotmail.com ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 01:35:38 -0700 From: Jan Winters Subject: ET: 4 poems written late at night Jan Winters wrote: > > Jan Winters wrote: > > > > hi angels > > > > 2 weeks and i'm back in europe for 6weeks! yahoo!!! > > here are 4 poems that i wrote right now. a lot is on my mind....its more > > like fragments of thought then anything else. > > > > thanks if you read these; means a lot to little ol' me :) > > > > kat > > imperfect angel > > > > I FORGOT HOW TO SAY... > > > > i forgot how to say > > i'm sorry > > and now its just a little to late > > to patch up what's already been done > > but i just forgot to say > > those simple words > > > > i forgot how to say > > i miss you > > right when you walked away > > i knew i should have said something, > > perhaps just "stay" > > but i forgot.... > > > > i forgot how to say > > i need you > > because i felt so strong > > that i couldn't handle > > being far from those arms > > now i'm empty > > and your free > > > > i forgot to say i love you > > because those words tickled my tongue > > i managed to close my eyes > > and mumble "nevermind" > > but i wanted to > > yes, i needed to > > > > i remembered to say goodbye > > as you went onto the plane > > i remebered to walk away > > before you wanted me to go > > > > i remembered what i should have forgotten > > and now i'm left alone > > and confused > > > > I HAVE FALLEN > > under the deep blanket sky > > i have seen something else > > and behind all of this mess > > i have felt something else > > > > god i barely know him > > and if there is such thing > > of someone i can truly believe in > > then he is the one > > > > > > his kisses make my tummy turn > > and the way he laughs > > fixes all of my burns > > and i have felt something new > > > > now's the time to look away > > i'm falling deeper into the cave > > i want to get out so bad > > god help me, make things safe > > > > i just pretend to be glad > > > > that he is leaving > > > > and i am gone > > > > i have fallen > > into this crazy storm > > > > > > > > HELLO AGAIN > > > > 13 days and 3 hours > > till i see your smile again > > my palms are already shaking > > my eyes watering > > > > 14 months since we have seen > > one another > > 2 years since i have step foot there > > 4 months since we have talked > > 10 since you have written > > > > god help me i'm counting > > > > the letters are still under my bed > > in a box with old pictures and roses > > -i pull it out when i think > > that i can handle rereading the goodbye > > > > my hand has become weak > > since you have last touched it > > > > my arms are numb > > no embraces capture > > what i want...what i miss > > > > but here i am > > ready to go on the plane > > what do i say? > > when you look me in the eye > > what do i do? > > when you tell me her name> > > how do i react > > when i see you with her > > and not me? > > > you ran for miles> > > > > but here i am > > hello again > > i've missed you > > > > SAFE ROAD > > > > my hair was pulled back behind my ears > > you gave me this half smile- > > i knew something was real > > i would like to blame it on the time of day > > it was before lunch and i was hungry > > for something new and exciting > > > > we talked on the phone for hours > > you called late to tell me > > jewel was on the tv > > i laughed at your jokes > > and we debated on belfast > > also planned a future trip to europe > > i never felt so together > > > > over coffee and bagals > > we talked with the paper in our hands > > i smoked a cigerette > > you told me to quit > > god you don't understand, this is it > > > > i cut my hair in a rage > > you loved it short > > i managed to lose all my friends with a nasty comment > > you chalked it up as one of those days > > you have those days as well; > > when nothing goes right > > and you can't believe your breathing at all > > > > we sat and listened to irish music > > i had hot tea and you had a beer > > i told you it wasn't healthy > > you laughed and couldn't believe i cared > > you slowly became me > > and i you > > > > the car ride to my house > > over the bridge late at night, > > you let me further into your life > > and i begain to cry > > while you held my hand > > -the tremble in your voice > > made everything seem so surreal > > > > "stay away from me > > it's not a safe road > > i beg you to leave > > and please don't say > > that we are meant to be" > > > > how can i fucking turn around? > > when you have given me hope? > > how can i say "everything is fine" > > when i can barely even cope? > > > > don't blow me kisses > > or help me wish on a star > > please don't smile in the halls > > or ask how my day is > > i'm chalking up your words > > as just one of those things > > as long as i never see you again > > i can edit this out of my memory > > -it's safer that way > > > > god i miss you ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 10:52:11 -0700 From: "Christie Ambert" Subject: ET: hey guys hey angels, Lara-maybe you`re right but i never thought he would email me,cause when we broke up i email him and he never answer until last week. I guess i never thought he would want to stay in contact after all he made it perfectly clear he never stayed friends with his xgirlfriends. James-thanks for the email you sent me that was so cool of you,you are a true angel...you should be the friendship angel :) Naomi-I owe you a chat in the mIRC,ill let you know the time and the day. ***plus other eda`s can join us at #eda_thoughts in Undernet. Well guys i have bee loosing my mind at work i havent been writting that much,cause i have no time.Yesterday went to the movie i saw a movie called the horse whisperer directed by robert redford it`s a beautiful movie and this word came to my mind as i was crying at one point of the movie... we are lucky, if we put our minds to it we can overcome any fear, any bad situation, any depression, in life. we are lucky, cause we SEE the world with a different propective. life for us is inspiration enough to write, and we write in order to survive. we are winner, we won the game of life, cause we breath our words, and we life in our own personal planets. were life isnt complicated, and living is just a page on our history. a chapter for every experience, and a book for every year. well that`s it for me, i am feeling better i might just ven email my x boyfriend....maybe later. take care angel, love always, Christie The Flowerchild Angel P.S. if anyone wants to put any of my poems in thweir webpage feel free to do so but email me the address so i can visit and check it out. Get your FREE, private e-mail account at http://www.mailcity.com ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 31 May 1998 16:08:29 -0700 From: moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Us) Subject: ET: hey Hi, Wow I just had the most amazing thing happen to me. It wasn't huge but it was drastic all the same. Basically I just spilled everything about myself in a fury of 10 minutes and five pages....(And it wasn't through this poem, though this is a result of it.) Sam the ? seawater angel I will walk and I will love I will preserve and I will accept I will not be ashamed but I won't be proud I'll keep my innocence without being naïve I'll learn myself and see my hopes Learn my dreams desperate for change Needing hope and feeling life Wanting guidance and needing freedom I'll show everyone who I really am I'll prove to myself that I can do it all So many ideals such changing ways I am not blind but I see the beauty I feel everything and block all else Sharply feel the pain gently kiss the gain wanting and needing feeling and seeing dreaming of sunshine dancing in the beams Learning constantly but staying the same old sides remain new sides grow & change I will walk and I will love I will someday see myself SM May 31 1998 moonsong@ix.netcom.com ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V1 #42 *********************************