From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #316 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Friday, December 18 1998 Volume 01 : Number 316 * If you ever wish to unsubscribe, send an email to * eda-thoughts-digest-request@smoe.org with ONLY * the word unsubscribe in the body of the email * . * PLEASE :) when you reply to this digest to send a post TO the list, * change the subject to reflect what your post is about. A subject * of Re: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #xxx or the like gives readers no clue * as to what your message is about. Today's Subjects: ----------------- Re: ET: sam returns to the consciousness! ...er, the world..? [Uneaq1@we] ET: poem: Questions [Seth Fulmer ] ET: the beloved fox mulder [gosiam@juno.com] ET: LIT MAG :) [zerocool@sunlink.net (Niki)] ET: the usual forecast of depression with a shedding of tears... ["a poet] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1998 03:01:33 -0800 (PST) From: Uneaq1@webtv.net (Maggie) Subject: Re: ET: sam returns to the consciousness! ...er, the world..? Why is the diary thing weird? I think and write like that!! I'm starting an excercise to lose this flippin' block...At some point in the day, I write down what I'm thinking as I'm thinking it. Just plain old thoughts. TODAY'S: 12-16 I can't write as fast as I think people I watch people think move work concentrate people All of them working concentrating except me All alone. As usual. Doing things by myself. Typical. Loner. But I'm a social loner. When I'm in a group, I'm still alone. Always alone. Always different. I think different.Act different. Very differetly. I'm your typical freak of nature oxymoron. I'm the poster child for an oxymoron. I'm a gullible cynic. a typical shunned welcomed freak. I wish I were different, yet i'm happy with who I am. All these feelings , they cloud up my reason. ~MATCBOX20 And that's what I wrote. Maggie ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1998 15:16:07 -0500 (EST) From: Seth Fulmer Subject: ET: poem: Questions This morning/early afternoon, I was thinking a little and here is a thing I wrote. I call it Questions..and I'm sure you'll see why :) Lemme know if you have suggestions, or compliments...Flames not welcome, but then who am I to stop you? Anyhow..here it is: Seth :o) mailto:kaosking@voicenet.com - ----------------- Questions by Seth D. Fulmer 12/17/98 Have you ever ran a red light and thought it looked kinda yellow? or went up to a girl in pink and said she looked like her mother? Have you ever sat in bed at night and contemplated the Inferno? or ran to school or work one morning to see if you had a heartbeat? Is life indeed a mystery or some cruel joke or riddle? Has evil really spread so far there's no point trying to fix it? When life has let you down and your strength has left you lower, Should you try to get back up or just sit back and let it settle? Have you ever drank so much that your brain starts to gargle? and the drink that's in your glass all night is lemon mixed with water? Have you ever sang a song so sweet it made the demons cry and bleed? Was the song so simple minded that a newborn sang along in tune? Has a person ever punched you in attempt to make you leave? but instead of leaving pronto, you let him mature and grow up instead? Is a person really worthless if he's not best friends with himself? If he's a genius and hates the world, is it over for us all? When you ask yourself questions that make no sense are you stupid? When you choose to ignore punctuation what's that say about your character? When you can make people laugh and cry at the same time, are you weird? and if you can't do either one, does that make you more unpopular? If a tree falls in the forest in a world devoid of forests or trees, Is the man who thought of that situation still more wrong that the dead? If a spirit walks right up to you and asks you for a smoke, Would you spit, faint, run away, or just give him a cigarette? If suddenly one day you ran upon a village of wraithes and poltergeists, and they were homeless, poor and hungry, and were pleading for your help, would you leave the village screaming, or would you attempt to satisfy their needs? Would you tell them to get lost, and take the village as you please? If you happened to come across a fellow claiming he was dead, and the only problem that he had was a lack of self-esteem, would you take him to a mental hospital, admit that he's insane, or tell him he is beautiful and take him home the night to stay? If suddenly one day all your friends told you to get lost? Would you do it then and there or just ride the situation out? If you one day heard on the news that the world had turned to anarchy, Would you rape and pillage and murder, or try to bring order to to the chaos? If you are walking down the street one day and find a bag of money with no owner, source, or destination; would you take it as your own? If you're sitting in your lounge chair one snowy christmas night Would you get up to check your mother if you heard the kitchen door explode? What if your best friend's christmas list consists of: stress, bad luck, depression? What would you decide to do if the last item is your death? What if you walked into their bedroom, and found them sacrificing serpents to a diety nobody's heard or talked about since centuries before the Exodus? Questions long ago we asked, and questions we'll still ask tomorrow Questions we will ask our children, those which we were asked ourselves Those which meant to puzzle college students going for their PhD Those same questions which children answer without moving a muscle ------------------------------ Date: Wed, 16 Dec 1998 08:27:30 -0600 From: gosiam@juno.com Subject: ET: the beloved fox mulder AHHH!! the time has come for me to expose myself as a major XPHILE!! i love xfiles , i breathe and live xfiles....thats me, spooky, i named myself after mr.mulder. as in mulder and that rational scientist scully..3 words my friends ; WHAT A SHOW!!! you really oughta watch it. on sunday there isn't going to be a new episode, but th e old one 'chirstmas carol' is a very ep. scully finds out shes the mother of a girl named emily, and there are lots of juicy moments. does nayone else watch xfiles? margaret ___________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com/getjuno.html or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1998 20:58:37 -0500 From: zerocool@sunlink.net (Niki) Subject: ET: LIT MAG :) Hey does anyone on this list happen to save all the poetry that is posted? Is it possible that you can send me all of my poems? Cuz Literary Mag started and my friend wants me to submit some of 'em...but I forget what they were cuz some I didn't write down...I've just recently started to save all the poems posted...not mine though...stupid silly me...well to everyone who helps me out THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!! Niki ********************************************* Time is never time at all You can never ever leave Without leaving a piece of youth And our lives are forever changed We will never be the same The more you change the less you feel ********************************************* ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1998 20:48:35 -0500 (EST) From: "a poet on 'Bleeker Street'" Subject: ET: the usual forecast of depression with a shedding of tears... Hello, So tell me what you think of this? Am I having a serious problem with depression...please tell me why as humans we should be happy? why not be depressed? maybe some of you'll ask why not--but i've not found an answer suitable to my understanding/my psyche....Well enjoy--hopefully.. and if you want to please check out my site Please!?!?? http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Coffeehouse/8132 Thanks...and remember to tell me what you think of this poem please? Thanks!!!!! - -Jk "i need a phone call i need a raincoat i really need a raincoat i really really need a raincoat i really really really need a raincoat"--Counting Crows (Rainging In Baltimore) Me 6 / "the usual forecast" by John Khuu 12/11/1998, s7:37pm/e8:52pm, @glass-table Lt="Raining In Baltimore" (CC) [AAW] 'Expect a mild shower tonight With a starless, cloudy sky. But other than that this morning should be sunny With the afternoon turning muddy gray. . . ' these tears are loaded in my eyes but these tears are afraid of heights so they don't want to fall to the ground but i'm the one falling down, down, down. . . and i've been afraid of smiling all this time 'cuz i won't be able to write pointless rhymes and those tears will retire into the air leaving me all alone unintended, uncared but loneliness taps on my shoulder endlessly to remind me again that i'm not really alone so i let loneliness encompass me as if it was hugging me but i still feel so all alone i wonder what it's like being so un-alone in this world: where people group together by categories, where you can talk to someone when troubles unfurl but i'm obligated to be pleased with this life of mine-so full of genial loneliness i need to talk to someone i need someone to hug away this emptiness but i only pick up the phone and try to dial 3-9-7, or is it 3-9-3? but maybe i should try 5-3-1, or is it 5-3-0? but i give up and call 5-8-5-4-3-0-3 and i quietly say, 'hello' but only to hear my own voice echoing back and my depression yells back to just give up this whole silly thing of making up this social gathering depression is so right about the forecast tonight that tonight is another waste of breath while the 'welcome' mat waits for death the other day the sun shined to me of what i am really: i'm just another masochistic beast and depression is my daily feast so tonight i inject another dosage of depression just so depression can assuage and murder the life out of happiness and i exercise myself by frowning instead of smiling because smiling is so beguiling when everyone hides behind a mask that only shows the apathy behind the mask depression tucks me into bed and says, 'good-night' while loneliness cuddles me then squeeezing me so tight and i fall asleep to the sound of murmuring fears while drowning in a bed of tears a bed where i've already fallen down, down. . . and so tears fall on to the pillow instead of the ground good-night, good-night and hope you sleep tight. . . . - --end of poem-- i sure could use some comfort from someone...anyone? and a quote from the poem i had just wrote before the above: "it's dark outside but i'm still trying to find a place to hide then maybe this depression will go away and just maybe i'll smile one day i feel like an empty gumball machine 'cuz despite these words there's no tears-nothing"--jk (invite me...please?!) ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V1 #316 **********************************