From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #174 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Monday, September 7 1998 Volume 01 : Number 174 Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: Confused [Karen Miller ] ET: thee question [sesykes@juno.com (Scott - E Sykes)] Re: ET: thee question [Summer Burton ] ET: Re: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #170 [alie campbell ] ET: rollin' rollin' rollin', keep it rollin' [moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Cha] ET: thee question [sesykes@juno.com (Scott - E Sykes)] Re: ET: stuff [sesykes@juno.com (Scott - E Sykes)] ET: Re: stuff ["Kevin Pease" ] ET: Re: thee question ["Kevin Pease" ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Sun, 6 Sep 1998 21:39:54 -0700 From: Karen Miller Subject: ET: Confused I am so very confused right now that i feel as thouhg i could cry laugh and smile all at the same time. here's a poem Confused I can't think anymore. my mind is going in circles. i do not kno what to do. i am changing and t dont know what to do. love is all i want yet i think boys are not important right now. I want ot feel a man by my side at night and to hold me and make me feel safe yet i cannot even think straight. i am write this poem in tears. i have know one to hold me and i need it so very badly..... bye i'm sorry for the stpid poem holly ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 6 Sep 1998 23:56:37 -0500 From: sesykes@juno.com (Scott - E Sykes) Subject: ET: thee question I'd like to ask this question with the deapest and most respest. Why is it that women say they can't find a good man when one is most likely sitting next to him? I've been told so many stories of abusive relationships where the girl gets hit or whatever and she's with him to the day. I can understand the love does have a factor in relationships but why him when right around the corner might be a guy who loves to give flowers, lie underneath the stars talking about life and love's little mysteries? If you're looking for a good man, then, well, we're all around? Why ladies? ** Scott S.** -Big Sexy Angel "MISPLACED HATE MAKES DISGRACED RACES!" -Tupac Shakur R.I.P _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 07 Sep 1998 00:27:46 -0500 From: Summer Burton Subject: Re: ET: thee question Scott - E Sykes wrote: > I'd like to ask this question with the deapest and most respest. > > Why is it that women say they can't find a good man when one is most > likely sitting next to him? I've been told so many stories of abusive > relationships where the girl gets hit or whatever and she's with him to > the day. I can understand the love does have a factor in relationships > but why him when right around the corner might be a guy who loves to give > flowers, lie underneath the stars talking about life and love's little > mysteries? If you're looking for a good man, then, well, we're all > around? Well, I could ask a question back at you: I'm optomistic, positive, smart, I've got pretty eyes, I'm romantic, I love boys, I love life and I love to laugh. My friend talks about people behind their backs, lies, steals from her friends and is pretty but wears makeup every day and won't go out with out it. Despite EVERYTHING I've read and heard and been told straight up by guys.. Every single mutual guy friend of ours digs her. They love me, because I listen to them, I hang out with them, I don't get grossed out when they act like guys, I crack funny jokes and I LIKE to listen to them ramble. I like hanging out with guys, and I love that I'm their friend, but I don't know one guy (not a one) that would go out with me.. So why's that? I think we're dealing less with an issue of girls not liking the good guys, OR guys not liking the good guys. It's just an un-explainable phenomenon between BOTH sexes that makes us like the wrong people.. A million guys have told me "You'd be a great girlfriend", but none of them want me as theirs. Why is that? I can't explain it.... THEY can't explain it. I also can't explain why I liked an egotistical, teasing jerk for 6 months. It just happens. To everyone... For now, I'm learning to be grateful that the guys I know aren't nervous around me and feel like they can talk to me 'bout stuff. My friend says she's jealous of me for that... I guess the grass is always greener. Love all of y'all, Summer ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1998 12:18:43 -0700 (PDT) From: alie campbell Subject: ET: Re: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #170 about the question about love: i think its possible to fall in love many times depending on the kind of person you are and your situation, you could fall in love with a stranger on the street if you had the time to get to know him, but you arent gonna walk up to any old stranger just to see if he could be the one(or many) i dont really know how to say what i mean but i hope that made a little bit of sense on another note i just got ANWA, i know i know, im a little slow, but i wrote a couple of poems after i read it an old man walks with a litlle girl like they are the best of friends one at the end of a life and the other at the beginning the blow bubbles in the gusting wind watching them float away and then burst in the air and although the two have little in common they share a bond stronger than any i've ever known and few ever do - ------------------------------------------- orange fiery sunbursts sitting atop long emerald stems swaying ever so slightly when the feathery wind blows just so their lean bodies reachingto the left then switching to the right as if they cant make up their minds which way to go _________________________________________________________ DO YOU YAHOO!? Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1998 14:05:01 -0700 From: moonsong@ix.netcom.com (Charlie, Cob & the GoA) Subject: ET: rollin' rollin' rollin', keep it rollin' Angels, I don't know why I thought of that as a topic, it just came into my head. Anyway, here ya go, xo. Love Sam the ? angel ~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~ Nothing Good Can Stay sm Sept 7 98 Woke up today to find you'd changed your mind with the pale progressing day you handed me my robe and told me your honesty you voiced what you'd been looking for nothing good can stay you said my love was fantasy like other flowers in my mind you said you're going to the city you'd seen a for sale sign you sold me with your motorbike you told me i'm a difficulty you changed your tone so rapidly & discarded your books on philosophy suddenly I'm less than second choice you led me to believe nothing good can stay, I say you say you prefere simplicity so you draw me in with wind-blown curtain ties and then throw me to the sea without caring to watch me fly woke up today to find you'd changed your mind with the pale progressing day nothing good can stay ` - ` - ` - ` - ` - ` - ` - ` - brown & yellow leaves scattered carlessly where they lay on a doormat on cement at a downward gaze shadowed by a flowered tree whose pink butterflies take to the wind an archway entwined to overgrown lushes of vines ^^^*^^^*^^^*^^^*^^^ sm sept 7 98 You handled me with care as though I might break like your mother's china You look through my fingertips made of gold, you say with a touch like yesterday's breeze you balance my words with your rivaling views and distance with my name in reading a novel you paint the cover to protect its youthful pages but you hold me in contempt too cautiously to see who I am or to let my soul breathe I ride along the breaker cliffs slice away through my strength to become free ~~~~~~~~~%~~~~~~~~~~~ Imagined sm sept 7 98 right across the bay there was a dock where you stood waiting "i'm scared," you said so i replied, just try for once, just try i think i imagined that you held the door for me the waiter whispered and they gave you a coat you seemed to think it was for keeps and you turned away and ate crackers you painted the stars maroon, that night you kept the keys to the Dodge that belonged to me you decided we need new picture frames you didn't even ask me you just act without questioning that maybe you are wrong "i like this one of us," i said, trying to ease a smile from your ever-creased face you know no respect "i don't" you told me and you threw it away i think i just might go tomorrow remove the keys while you lay sleeping in your silky bed of security take my car and drive into the morning i think i imagined that you might miss me moonsong@ix.netcom.com ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1998 16:43:58 -0500 From: sesykes@juno.com (Scott - E Sykes) Subject: ET: thee question It can be explained! A guy, for example, might not go out with a girl for a certain reason but would hang with a girl as friends for a certain reason. Whatever that reason is, the guy (or girl) has their reasons. I might have the chance to go out with a super model and would do so but she is a total (excuse the language) bitch to me and has a horrible attitiude yet wants a 2nd date. That would be a reason. Really, just ask the guy and will probably recieve an answer why. What asked in the last question was why a girl would stay with a guy who is verbally, mentally, or physically abusive to her when there are millions of "Good" men everywhere? >Well, I could ask a question back at you: I'm optomistic, positive, smart, I've got pretty eyes, I'm romantic, I love boys, I love life and I love to laugh. My friend talks about people behind their backs, lies, steals from her friends and is pretty but wears makeup every day and won't go out with out it. Despite EVERYTHING I've read and heard and been told straight up by guys.. Every single mutual guy friend of ours digs her. They love me, because I listen to them, I hang out with them, I don't get grossed out when they act like guys, I crack funny jokes and I LIKE to listen to them ramble. I like hanging out with guys, and I love that I'm their friend, but I don't know one guy (not a one) that would go out with me.. So why's that? I think we're dealing less with an issue of girls not liking the good guys, OR guys not liking the good guys. It's just an un-explainable phenomenon between BOTH sexes that makes us like the wrong people.. A million guys have told me "You'd be a great girlfriend", but none of them want me as theirs. >Why is that? I can't explain it.... THEY can't explain it. I also can't explain why I liked an egotistical, teasing jerk for 6 months. It just happens. To everyone... For now, I'm learning to be grateful that the guys I know aren't nervous around me and feel like they can talk to me 'bout stuff. My friend says she's jealous of me for that... I guess the grass is always greener. Love all of y'all, Summer _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1998 18:34:44 -0500 From: sesykes@juno.com (Scott - E Sykes) Subject: Re: ET: stuff ya know ladies, i thought it over and a guy can't tell what guys truly and genuinely like in the other sex. We are ALL different and like different things. You can ask me personally rather than guys in general what i like and that would be easy to answer. Sorry ladies! On Mon, 07 Sep 1998 03:22:27 +0200 "Dr. RomeAntic" writes: >Niki wrote: > >> And now a question for the guys on this list-what kind of girls do >you >> like? > >Tough question... I will take this question as a question about >personality.I'm not >saying looks don't matter to me, but are of secondary importance >as long as it's not physical repulsion... >I don't believe there's a specific list of things I like...everybody >is unique >and some things are just crazy to expect... but if I'd have to pick >some >qualities I found attractive so far... spontaneous behaviour, ability >to >make conclusions and give opinion on things and back them up, with >some personal beliefs and statements - AKA inteligence - sense of >humor (any kind) is very important cause I can get really crazy:)) >And of course things like : love for music, movies, poetry, culture >etc. > >> And how would you feel if some chic that you didn't know walked up >to >> you and just started talking an' stuff? Just wondering about this >stuff... > >I'm actually all for that kind of action... but how would I feel >depends on >what that chic would have to say and how she'd say it... I might get >impressed, disgusted or anything in between... I don't have to worry >about that... doesn't happen to me... oh unless it's about something >irrelevant! Like "what time is it"? Or "do you have some change I'm >broke and really need to get on that buss" :)) > >Have fun and stay beautiful > >Dr. RomeAntic, an angel with the worst stroke of luck > >"You look so fine > I wanna break your heart > And give you mine" > Garbage/You Look So Fine/Version 2.0 > > >Catch Dr. RomeAntic's cyber image @ >http://www.geocities.com/Paris/Metro/2009 > > > > ** Scott S.** -Big Sexy Angel "MISPLACED HATE MAKES DISGRACED RACES!" -Tupac Shakur R.I.P _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1998 20:43:58 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: ET: Re: stuff Wahoo... So I finally have email back, and I'm back from Louisiana (Land of heat, etouffe, and alligators... :) in more or less one piece, tired, but good. :) So anyway, since you probably don't care where I returned from... on to my response. :) >> Niki writes: >Hey everyone! Ok I have a question for all of you...how many times do you >think a person can truly fall in love? I don't think there's necessarily a limit to this. You'll always fall in love with different people for different reasons, but it's not like if you fall in love 6 times, you can't fall in love ever again, because you'll be physically incapable of doing so... I'm a firm believer in sort of "making your own fate", and I think this sort of falls into the same category, too... if you want to say, "This was the one true love of my life," and never try for anything else, then yeah, you'll have a hard time falling in love again. If you go out and make things happen, there's an endless supply of people to fall in love with. :) Yeah, it's not that easy... but the only limits on which (and how many) people you can love are the limits you place on them yourself. >And now a question for the guys on this list-what kind of girls do you >like? Um... girls. :) I don't necessarily like a particular "type"... my basic requirement is that a girl has to be willing to put up with my crap... :) I like a sense of confidence (not to be confused with a sense of superiority... I don't like snobs... :), a sense of humor, intelligence, outgoing personalities, and all that other stuff, but lack of one or two, or three, or even all four, of those characteristics isn't really going to make me run away if there's other good stuff in there. Although sense of humor is extremely important... I'm a clown 90% of the time, and it's hard putting up with that unless a girl can laugh. At me or with me, it doesn't matter... she just has to be able to laugh. :) Really, though... It's hard to quantify what I "like" because I like lots of stuff... there's a much shorter list of things I don't like, I think. >And how would you feel if some chic that you didn't know walked up to >you and just started talking an' stuff? Just wondering about this stuff... Well, it depends on the "an' stuff" part, I think. I mean, is she picking her nose or something? :) I've never had a problem with a girl coming up and talking to me, although it happens rather infrequently. :) I can talk, but I hate trying to *start* conversations with people I don't know, so if some girl wants to come up and say "hi", I've got absolutely no problem with that. I don't like pushy people, or overly aggressive people, though, so if some girl comes over to me and just gets in my face, I'm not cool with that... but really, as long as it's just being friendly... I wish it would happen more often. :) Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "Sometimes I sing like my life is at stake, 'cause you're only as loud as the noises you make..." ---(Ani DiFranco)--- ------------------------------ Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1998 21:05:33 -0400 From: "Kevin Pease" Subject: ET: Re: thee question >> Scott - E Sykes writes: >Why is it that women say they can't find a good man when one is most >likely sitting next to him? My feeling on this is, they don't know they're sitting next to a good man if the good man doesn't speak up. :) I've been told that many times, and I think it's true, from people I know... A lot of the "nice" guys I know would range in a description of social abilities from "fairly shy" to "downright antisocial"... I'd like to think I'm a pretty nice guy, and I still always have a lot of problems meeting women, and a lot of it is because (as I've mentioned before), I *hate* starting conversations with people I don't know... I suck at it, plain and simple. That right there is probably 75% of the reason why the fact that I'm a "nice guy (tm)" hasn't show through. :) The same thing applies to a lot of my friends... they're real nice guys, but they're terrified to go up and talk to a girl. (For the record: I'm not terrified, I just sound like a complete moron... I ain't got that "je ne sais quois" (French for: "smooth-talking, steroid-enhanced, perfect-haired movie star look." :) ) Another thing I believe is that some younger girls (and please don't beat me, 'cause a lot of you ARE younger than me... this is my opinion, not a sociological fact that I've established. There are undoubtedly exceptions. :) seem to be looking for an "exciting" sort of guy... there comes an age where the nice guys actually have an edge (from what I've seen, after college, it seems to start reversing a bit), because the girls are looking for more than someone with attractive chin stubble and a fast car. (AGAIN: I am not naming names, or saying this is the way all girls see things, or even that this is the way MOST girls see things... I've noticed it in some, and I think this contributes to the attitude Scott mentioned. If you don't like what I'm saying, disagree... just don't mail bomb me. :) I can't really blame them... if I were a 17 year old girl, and I was given the option to choose between: Me, or Leonardo DiCaprio, I'd choose Leonardo hands down, too. He looks & seems more like the exciting type of guy, who will fly someone to Paris for the evening, and then maybe get involved in a high speed chase through Beverly Hills. Whereas *I* am the sort of guy who believes that driving fast is fun sometimes, but really... nobody wins when we play games with traffic safety. And you better forget about flying to Paris for the evening with me... I live within a budget. :) Guys who can come across as attractive, exciting, and "so money"... they're the ones who are more noticeable. I come across as average, cautious, and "well, I have a job at least...", and that's why I don't get noticed when I'm standing next to one of those other guys. >I've been told so many stories of abusive >relationships where the girl gets hit or whatever and she's with him to >the day. I can understand the love does have a factor in relationships >but why him when right around the corner might be a guy who loves to give >flowers, lie underneath the stars talking about life and love's little >mysteries? There's a lot more to abusive relationships than love, though... it has a lot to do with "power" in the relationship, and the way the particular guy and girl approach their respective roles in the relationship... past histories have a lot to do with this type of relationship as well. Abusers were often abused... Abusees were often abused, as well... many of the abusers end up copying their childhood role models, and many of the abusees often can't break free from their attachment to their childhood abusers... unfortunately, a vicious cycle, and one that can't be explained by a simple, "He says he loves me," or "She says she loves me..." To many people in relationships like this, they have no real conception of the existence of people who *don't* abuse, and what it's like to be loved without the fear of being socked in the face... it's the norm, and it's accepted that people hit or get hit by both parties... It's not right, but it's the sad, unfortunate way it works. Kevin - ---------- Kevin Pease kbpease@boston.crosswinds.net (ICQ UIN: 3106063) (AOL Instant Messenger: kbpease) http://www.crosswinds.net/boston/~kbpease "Sometimes I sing like my life is at stake, 'cause you're only as loud as the noises you make..." ---(Ani DiFranco)--- ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V1 #174 **********************************