From: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org (eda-thoughts-digest) To: eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Subject: eda-thoughts-digest V1 #115 Reply-To: eda-thoughts@smoe.org Sender: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-eda-thoughts-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk eda-thoughts-digest Sunday, August 16 1998 Volume 01 : Number 115 Today's Subjects: ----------------- ET: a poem on high school [Jan Winters ] ET: me [Uneaq1@webtv.net (Maggie)] ET: poem about me ["Seth D. Fulmer" ] ET: poem about me ["Naomi Vaughn" ] ET: are selves [Karen Miller ] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Sat, 15 Aug 1998 10:31:22 -0700 From: Jan Winters Subject: ET: a poem on high school welcome back cheerleaders dressed in gold and blue old lockers that barely open god, why isn't any of this new? at the point when i've seen it all homecoming, prom, football games and elerms glue can't understand why they only accept college ruled paper can't explain why black ink is so great the same halls that i have walked on without any shoes the same halls where he kissed me where he held my hand where i realized he is worse then cafeteria food going back monday back to the world which i don't belong going back to that three story yellow brick school right in middle of town going back to where i've been for the past 3 years yet still no one cares they call the stadium the fishbowl our mascot is a running tarpon all of these things bother me. they are welcoming me back to hell for the last year wonder what they will do will they cry? will they yell? i'm not nervous anymore, just a little embarrased wish i could be like thelma and run from all of this going back to the same place which i dread for one last year. kat ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 15 Aug 1998 17:17:47 -0500 (CDT) From: Uneaq1@webtv.net (Maggie) Subject: ET: me Oh wow...a whole post about me!! I don't know whether to call this poetry or prose...it might be both. 8-15-98 I am an oxymoron. I like to be alone, but I love to be with people. I have fallen in love with the ocean...but I live in Minnesota. I can't wait 'til we move out to Oregon. But I almost start to cry thinking about leaving my friends. I am 14. I am a Cancer, but my mom's a Capricorn (the exact opposite). I am blonde...but I wish I were a redhead. I love going up and sitting on the roof and watching the sky and thinking. I like wearing camoflage. I like my nickname, Squid. I really like guys, but I'm too shy to flirt. Guys gawk at me...I blush. I am almost curvy...at least, compared to my friends. I medaled in Speech this year. The one-act competition play I was in made it to Sections. I love to act. I'm shy. I'm not popular...but I have plenty of friends. Put simply, I'm an oxymoron. Maggie...the oxmoronic angel :Þ Every beginning comes from some other beginning's end. ~Semisonic, "Closing Time" PS: Thanks for reading my ramblings!! ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 15 Aug 1998 20:34:14 -0400 From: "Seth D. Fulmer" Subject: ET: poem about me Ok, this poem is about me(yes and no)...The first part is probably the part MOST like me, although the rest of the poem is about me in a way as well. I hope everyone enjoys it. I wrote it a while ago when I was really upset about how my life was going(not that it's any better now) I hope you all take care and Have a Great Day!! :) Seth D. Fulmer mailto:kaosking@voicenet.com ============================================================= The Odyssey of Chaos by Mr. Seth D. Fulmer I am born before all time, during, and afterwards as well I love and I hate; I adore and destroy I am emotionless, and I think logically But I cry at the slightest thought of an unborn baby about to die I think democratic thoughts, and wish for free speech I demand individuality in everything one thinks and preaches I create happiness for others by providing that which others cannot However at the same moment, I wish for everyone to bow down to me like an idol in the street, like the king of the world, or a god of the universe I believe myself almighty, yet at the same time I humble before the poor I would never strike a woman, yet I will never be held captive by one I am my own master, yet I am servant to all There is a being on a planet called Earth He lived a pitiful existence always villing to be more Early in his life, he was cursed through and through by the lords of the Universe when he came into the world He was cursed with obesity for most of his youth, His eyesight was poor, and glass was no help In the third year of his schooling, his hormones shone through He chased after his fellow female classmates as if they were criminals He was never told "NO!, Don't do that again" Instead, he was told "Go to the corner and stand" Now, that my dear friends did no good for him There's not a punishment alive that will make him repent not fire, not ice, not a million lashes of whips And now, as an adult, there's not a word that will change him For he is his own person, an individual self-established His parents, nor his peers, nor his reverend minister had a say in what he declared would be his beliefs. He does what he wants, whenver and where he wants If it happens to conflict with somebody or himself, he says "C'est la vie! Who cares? I certainly don't" Now, this being, on Earth, passed gracefully through life He tuned his own morals and personality for delight When around group A, he would show them person A But when he walked to group B, person A lived no longer When he was around group A and group B at the very same time, the personalities might conflict and in that case he tried to get himself away from the situation at hand He shied away from situations that might make him lose hand He had little emotion except for anger, and volition Life would give him a pinochle deck with which to play Hearts He was never ever surprised, nor happy, nor sad Anger struck like thunder if betrayal ever stung. He cared little of his appearance;He saw it very minor for what use was there for mating when you could easily have the world He met a group of friends in his eighth year of school; The group remained like that far beyond the end of the road In his senior year of High School, he was forced to make a date He had promised his darling sister that he was going to the prom He searched throughout the school for the perfect girl to ask, but after searching far and wide, all he found was one She was beautiful as night with a blue dress and sparkles The poor sir felt guilty that she had to drive over When they arrived at the dance hall, and parked and signed in, The couple met up with the lady's good friends After pictures were taken and dinner was eaten, the finely dressed couple went over for their picture Once that was done, and the essentials were finished, the two took some time alone on the dance floor Several dances were danced while through others he sat out He ran into teachers that joined in the fun A Spanish teacher, an english teacher, the principal too He was simply delighted as he liked to see people happy Later that evening when the couple went home, the gentlemen wished to continue and tried all his might to ask the girl out on a second of dates The only thing keeping him was what she said next The lady replied before he even asked, "I'd like to stay friends and continue no longer." Well, the being on Earth kept the pictures of the event He placed them in a wooden box and some items were engraved Later on, some pictures will have been placed for public view on a place in cyberspace where only intelligent people grew Along with some pictures of other times in his past, and poems such as these he placed them at last But alas this is jumping too far in the future, this future is near, but not soon enough. The fine sir's first year in the next school of choice remained to him a mystery as he embarked for this flight. He tried out his hand at new personalities he grew in the summer before, and his life long ago He met some great friends, all strange to his liking But then he made enemies the same quantity still While looking for fun on an evening before class, He came to a movie that was a ruse for some boys With one of his friends he had met the week before, he watched the great cinema and then headed for the door A few days later in the week, his curiosity was peaked as to what this organization was about. Through talking in a circle, and munching on some pretzles, the young man had made up his mind The ceremony was in two days He was scared none the less of the tortures this fraternity might do to him His thoughts were of films of hazing and late-night drills and disrespect as young men should never receive But soon it was over, and none too soon either The young man was turned into a pledge Through ten weeks of trials, of quizzes, and of burials of morals and principles so dear this being from Earth was brainwashed and worse and will thus never be the same He was subjected to books, to paddles, and trips to places where God only dreamed of finding someday In the spring of that year, after this gentlemen turned acquired his membership into the brotherhood, the chapter then voted that he would then be the master of pledges for the chapter to be Ten weeks of hazing that he put through the brothers, through intense struggles of language, and interests, and bothers, this young man pursued and pushed the class forward to the best of his knowledge they did their best in college At the end of the trial, which was shorter than his, thus making it more difficult for him to succeed, the pledges became brothers and thus came the day that this young and kind gentleman would receive a pie in the face That summer yet still would put him through hell with depression, big stress and still more He cried to his friends, made love to long pins, and even had thoughts of suicide The biggest peer pressure would come end of summer when he found out from his school where to work It would be far from home and alas he would be alone far from anywhere of interest to him Once that time came to move in the game, the stress would be sure to follow He was forced against will to be driven until his new roomate was sure to arrive For a week, no two or three, he learned his fair share of this language that was too easy to care But as the time flew, he needed to learn more for the job became more to bear Around the third week of that hellish scenario, the scholarly gentleman took hospice with a local chapter of his fraternity The group acted kind, and appeared just the same He went to their RUSH event and was surprised by the turnout only to find there would be no pledgeclass Then came a time when a brother from his home chapter decided to mosey on over to the local school He used his sweet charm and delighted the females He made sick sweet jokes that only they could get The brother from home and the gentleman too accompanied the brothers to their dorm rooms The gentleman chatted with the one brother all while the sweet talker arranged his way with the others Finally, the brothers kicked the two sirs from their room politely of course and escorted them to the door So there finishes the story of the poor lad from Earth His life was pathetic, stinky and not well He stayed depressed most of the time while continuing to please others This gentleman had no real life of which to tell But this is the story of my son you see For I am, was and will be Chaos in Prophecy ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 15 Aug 1998 20:04:38 -0700 From: "Naomi Vaughn" Subject: ET: poem about me hey angels~ wasn't sure whether or not to post this cause it's kinda stupid imo..but I figured I may as well ~ later angels!! love ya's, Naomi the unknown angel "i'm not sick...but i'm not well..." -flagpole sitta, harvey danger - ---- *Me* I'm taller than my mom, but that's not saying much. I'm technically a blonde, but don't always look it. I love my hazel eyes. People say my braces make me look older; older than what, I'm not sure. I'm the most concieted insecure person I know. I don't have enemies, and I've been told I'm too nice. I hate my waist and thighs, but my friends say I look good in a bikini. I've been called unique and interesting, and haven't yet decided if that's a good thing. I just want to fit in. I don't love very easily, ever since a guy confessed his feelings to me, and I couldn't return them. He ripped me apart, for treating him the way I did. but he doesn't know, that I hated myself so passionatley for hurting him the way I did, that I was depressed and suicidal for months. He doesn't know that I would have gladly taken his pain. I just want to be accepted. I can't stand myself, and I'm bad with people. I'm really shy, but I talk too much. I wring my hands when I'm nervous. I love to laugh, and I'm most honest around 2 or 3 in the morning. My friends get mad at me for talking bad about myself, and I often feel like a burden. I depend on others for my happiness, even though I know I shouldn't. I feel like a fake, cause I don't believe this can really be who I am. I can't date, and I feel foolish cause I wish I knew what it felt like to be kissed. I'm just waiting to live, and I hate myself for it. I don't know what I want to be, and I don't know who I am, but I've never wanted to be anyone else. 8-16-98 - --- "How many corners do I have to turn? How many times do I have to learn, All the love I have is in my mind?" ~Verve Angelfire for your free web-based e-mail. http://www.angelfire.com ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 15 Aug 1998 20:44:15 -0700 From: Karen Miller Subject: ET: are selves Look at us. We all are calling are selves ugly, or stupid or saying we want to fit in calling are selves fakes and old and nothings, god we thrash are selves as if we mean nothing to the world like if we die know one will care. tell me am I the only one seeing this? holly " is it me or you that I'm afraid cant bring myself to let you go" Madonna "bad girl" ------------------------------ End of eda-thoughts-digest V1 #115 **********************************