From: owner-avalon-digest@smoe.org (avalon-digest) To: avalon-digest@smoe.org Subject: avalon-digest V10 #154 Reply-To: avalon@smoe.org Sender: owner-avalon-digest@smoe.org Errors-To: owner-avalon-digest@smoe.org Precedence: bulk avalon-digest Wednesday, June 29 2005 Volume 10 : Number 154 Today's Subjects: ----------------- [AVALON] Clarkson reviews Ferry ["Andy Cooper" ] RE: [AVALON] Clarkson reviews Ferry [philip77@tiscali.co.uk] To leave the list, mail majordomo@smoe.org with: unsubscribe avalon-digest ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: Tue, 28 Jun 2005 14:33:14 +0000 From: "Andy Cooper" Subject: [AVALON] Clarkson reviews Ferry Apologies if this has already been posted but it made me laugh.......it seems "owar Jezza woz at Camden". ~~~~~~~ Snipped from the Sunday Times, Jeremy Clarkson wrote:- I know I have something of a reputation for being a rock dinosaur but you should see my daughters record collection. Of course, it isnt a record collection as such; its an assembly of ones and noughts on her computer, but anyway, being 10, she likes Maroon Five and Avril Somethingorother, but mostly her binary ballads are from Led Zep, which she thinks are so cool, and Bad Company. This means, of course, she doesnt mind at all when Mummy and Daddy go out at night to see artists you thought had gone west in a puddle of vomit and chemicals some time in 1976. In the past couple of years weve seen Roger Waters, Blondie, Yes, the Who (half of whom have actually gone west in a puddle of vomit and chemicals) and then last week, Roxy Music. Bryan Ferry is a remarkable human specimen. He is a man for whom the ageing process has had no meaning. He may now be a hundred and twenty-twelve but there are no man breasts, no spread and no sign of a hair hole. And you should see him move. Be assured, his rebellious pro-hunting son Otis can never say to a mate: Hey, you dance like my dad. Because no one, no matter how athletic they be, is that good. The man redefines anyones concept of cool. He even makes whistling cool, which is technically impossible. And whats more, its rumoured he once ticked off a younger son for swearing while their hijacked jet was in the process of nose-diving. And this iciness comes through on stage as his band of real, proper, clever and talented musicians run through a set of songs that would leave any modern band open-mouthed in astonishment. The best thing, though, is that the audience was also far cooler than anything youll find at a teenage rave. There were no football shirts, no spots and none of that awful greased-down hair that is so popular with tyre fitters. There were one or two rather strange-looking creatures whose barnet had been styled in 1974 and then left to thin out all by itself. I may have also seen some black T-shirts tucked into jeans, which also dated from the early Seventies. But for the most part it was bright-eyed, middle-aged people for whom time has been kind. There was no unduly long queue for the lavatory cubicles, nobody was flogging bags of expensive aspirins, and in the ballads, instead of waving cigarette lighters around, everyone held up their mobile phones so their kids could hear the tunes too. Best of all, nobody was beaten up and murdered on the way out. Everyone just piled into their Range Rovers and went for something to eat. Now, compare this with sharing a tent, in a field, having spent the day listening to a bunch of teenagers in spectacularly baggy trousers banging bits of garden furniture together. It doesnt even get close. Rocknroll, Im beginning to suspect, is not a going concern. Its not, as we have always thought, simply a means by which teenagers can annoy their parents but rather a one-off 30-year moment in the development of music. Like baroque and skiffle and oratorio. Every attempt to change the original formula, be it hip-hop, garage, techno or rap, certainly grates with those older than 12, but thats its only purpose. Its not music to annoy the old. Its just a noise to annoy the old. Which means that when its fans become old, it will not survive. I can absolutely guarantee that 30 years from now, nobody will be going all the way to London to see P Diddly, or whatever hes called this week. Whereas, my wife and I will be availing ourselves of cheap-rate rail fares and heading to Camden, again, to see Bryan Ferry, again. And you know what: he still wont have any man breasts and hell still be dancing like a hard-bodied ballerina. ~~~~~~~~ All the best... Andy C ___________________________________________________________________________ To unsubscribe, mail majordomo@smoe.org with: unsubscribe avalon ------------------------------ Date: Tue, 28 Jun 2005 22:40:08 +0100 From: philip77@tiscali.co.uk Subject: RE: [AVALON] Clarkson reviews Ferry Clarkson is usually a prat, but sometimes I find a sneakin g admiration for him. Like when he travelled round the world in 24 hours or when he went in search of his ancestry for the BBC. Here , he has it again. Philip ___________________________________________________________ Book yourself something to look forward to in 2005. 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